Should I take away my 25 month olds pacifier now or after the baby come?

Question

I have a 25 month old who loves her binki. She really only uses it in her bed and in the car. Sometimes if she is having a really bad day she will walk around with it. I can see how much it soothes her just by looking at her face muscles relax. I am due to have a baby in a couple more weeks who will also probably have a binki. Should I take my 2 year olds now or wait until the baby comes? I was thinking that I can use the baby to stress that binkis are for babies and maybe she will want to give it up. What do you think?

Answer 1

I think a 25 month old is also a baby and it will be very important for your to keep that tenderly in mind as she is dethroned. Dentists will tell you there's nothing wrong with her having it for years more.

Babies who nurse nurse for comfort. Babies who don't, and some who do and can't get enough, use a pacifier for comfort. You see this yourself. What is changing that she no longer needs her comfort? (I'm guessing not much.)

I wouldn't use her being the big girl and the baby being a baby as motivation for her. Likely as not, it will stress her out and invalidate her experience of life. She is still very very very young. Let her be young, too, in addition to the newer baby.

You can try the big sister thing and see if it appeals to her, but you will meet her emotional needs much better if you think of yourself as having two babies - until the day she starts telling you with pride the ways she's bigger. But, they're not too far apart in age and she'll still be young essentially while the baby's young.

Let her teach you how kids her age act - they act like her. The best thing you can do is accept her as she is and not try to make her 'grow up' faster than is her natural development. Don't tell her how she should be, let her be.

You're dethroning her and this is devastating, and you are giving her a baby sibling and that is wonderful. But don't make her resent that baby more than she already will (and she will - your birth order will indicate how clued in to that you might be already) by telling her that the very natural and 'babyish' ways she feels and things she wants are no longer hers.

That's just my opinion, I could be wrong.

Enjoy these wonderful babies!

Answer 2

That seems like a good idea but at the same time, the 25 month old may be really hard to handle along with a new baby if you take the binky away from her and then this new baby that she will probably be jeolouse of anyways gets to have the binky. I would try to get the binky away now and do tell her that they are for babys and when the baby comes and she she he/she with it then you can say "see the binkys are for babys" . Goodluck!

Answer 3

I would do it now. It only took my boys about three days before they were completely over not having theirs anymore. They were 22 months when we took it away and by then they were only taking it at nap time and bed time anyway. I think the 2 year old will have enough changes to deal with when the new baby arrives and could possibly think that the new baby is the reason why she can't have her binki. She may end up resenting the baby because she will associate the arrival of the new baby with the loss of her security. You can still say, "See, aren't you glad you got rid of your binki. I told you they were only for babies. You are such a big girl."

Answer 4

If it we me , Id let her have it a bit longer.. it will more than likely cause some resentment towards the new baby, and there will probably be some of that anyways..lol Maybe when your little girl is a bit older, you could tell her that this xmas we are going to hang all your binkies on the xmas tree and in return santa will leave you presents and just no more binkie at all after that. That worked a treat with my daughter, she tried to flog my friends babies binkie a few times but just exlpained to her that she's too old now and santa gave you presents in return for them remember, can't let santa down ..lol

Answer 5

The birth of your second child will bring so much change in her life. You can try it now, but when they are young they revert into old ways whenever anything in their lives change. My oldest loved her binky, too. She was 1 1/2, and I snipped off the tip while she wasn't looking, and told her that binky was broken. She did know that the store sold more, but I took her somewhere that didn't sell them, and told her all binky's are gone-gone. She was devastated at first, but she was over it in a week or so.

Answer 6

Try to explain to her that pacifiers are for babies and now that she's going to be a big sister, it's time to take her binki and give it to the baby.

She may seem resentful at first, but maybe if you include her and make her part of the event (have her "give" the pacifier to the new baby the first time she sees it), she'll probably feel proud of herself.

Good luck

Answer 7

Why do you want to take it away? If your childs binki gives her a sense of security and comfort why would you want to change that?
I've never seen a six year old with a pacifier! Relax and let her do it in her own time.

Answer 8

over 2 and still suckin on a binky? take it away asap!! Does she still take a bottle too? Potty Trained Yet?
Dont wait too long because the binky may cause dental problems in the future.

Answer 9

I had the same problem my 3 year old had a sus and i was pregnant .Think about it the baby will have a pacifier and ur 25month old too?cut it now or else he will steal it from the other sibling and that will make it harder to cut it later on .

Answer 10

She's a bit old to still be needing a pacifier, I was fortunate enough to have my first two never using one. In fact they would spit it out no matter what I did lol. Try coaxing her away from it by giving her a cracker while in the car and getting her used to it not being in her mouth.