How do you cheer up an Atheist lady who is near the end of her life and has nothing to look forward to?

Question

this friend of mine - she's older - thinks she is near dying, and she's very depressed because she doesn't believe that there is a good afterlife. She is not sure what to expect, but thinks that if there is any afterlife at all, there's no way of knowing that it would be good.

How can I help her not be depressed? I don't want to push my faith on her. But I want her to be peaceful and happy.

this question is not made up! grrrr.

Answer 1

Console her with the fact that not one person on earth knows if there's an afterlife or what one would be like.

Many people claim to know there is one but it's not fact and there's no evidence that there IS an afterlife.

Maybe there is one, maybe not. Maybe it's great, maybe not. It's a surprise and an adventure that she gets to go on soon.

"How can I help her not be depressed? I don't want to push my faith on her. But I want her to be peaceful and happy."

You sound like a very good friend.

Answer 2

You don't have to push your faith, but you could share with her the hope you have for her. For instance, if I was in your situation, I would share the following with my friend. I would let her know that this is what I believe will be:

The Bible assures us: “There are new heavens and a new earth that we are awaiting according to [God’s] promise, and in these righteousness is to dwell.” (2 Peter 3:13; Isaiah 65:17) Sometimes when the Bible speaks of “the earth,” it means the people who live on the earth. (Genesis 11:1) So the righteous “new earth” is a society of people who receive God’s approval. Jesus promised that in the coming new world, those approved by God would receive the gift of “everlasting life.” (Mark 10:30) John 3:16 and 17:3 tells us what Jesus said we must do to receive everlasting life. Since the dead "are conscious of nothing", there is no need to fear dying or the dead. (Eccl. 9:5,6) Now consider from the Bible the blessings that will be enjoyed by those who qualify for that wonderful gift from God in the coming earthly Paradise.

Sickness will vanish. As Ruler of God’s heavenly Kingdom, Jesus will do healing on a far grander scale than when he was on earth. (Matthew 9:35; Mark 1:40-42; John 5:5-9) Then “no resident will say: ‘I am sick.’”—Isaiah 33:24; 35:5, 6.

Dead loved ones will be restored to life with the prospect of never dying. All those sleeping in death who are in God’s memory will be brought back to life. In fact, “there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.”—Acts 24:15; John 5:28, 29.

I wouldn't read it all too her like it is written here, but the thoughts are what I would share. Hopefully, even if she herself doesn't believe it but for a second, it can give her some comfort.

I wish you the best!

Answer 3

Foolish is he who frets at night,
And lies awake to worry.
A weary man when morning comes,
He finds all as bad as before.

Straight from the Havamal. The Scandinavian/Asatruar way of saying "don't worry, because worry does you no good".

I agree with Debra, tho. Let her know you love her. Keep her company, hold her hand if she wants it and let her tell you her fears. You don't have to proselytize. I actually feel it would not be advisable as you would most likely just add to her anxiety if she didn't convert to your faith. And if she did - it would be insincere as it was based on fear. I hope the diety you worship is too smart to fall for that.

Focus on the positive as much as possible. Distract her from any morbid thoughts, if you can. Laugh and talk and joke with her. Do the same things you'd do for any depressed friend who WASN'T dying. If you look at her as a dying person rather than a friend who is depressed, she'll sense it and respond appropriately - with more anxiety.

Good luck and bless you for being such a caring friend to that lady. I wish her well on her journey and hope she finds peace before she goes beyond the veil.

~Morg~

Answer 4

I've been there too. I had a friend who walked away from her faith and was to the point of being suicidal. I learned that there's not a whole lot you can do for them. Prayer, compassion, and love is about all that you can give them to ease their mind. And let her know what a blessing she is to you. It's a very hard thing to go through, but I'm glad that she has someone like you who is obviously willing to go to some great lengths for her. Asking for help to help someone else is a great thing to do, you are truly a blessing to her.

Answer 5

You are kidding right? Here's what the hospice people, nurses and doctors do in my neck of the woods. They prescribe atropine, stand around like a coven of witches while the poor dying patient suffers irrational fears and anxiety. That'll teach them to be atheist. Give 'em a taste of HELL. Well, they did that to my mom. They say it's to open the airways of cancer patients but I could not find that anywhere on the 'net. The 'groundless fear and anxiety' was well documented however.

Answer 6

Care for her. She doesn't need hope of the after life. Instead, make her remember the fruitful and happy days. If there is any consolation, share her the joy that her remains will nourish the earth and life would feed from it. Do not force her into believing now.

Answer 7

This actually happened to me. Maybe you could read it to her. It sure changed my opinion.

Several years ago I had an unusual experience concerning an uncle, a distant relative who lived over a thousand miles away.

While driving my car I suddenly felt the unmistakable presence of this relative that I hardly even knew. He was more like someone I had heard about than someone I knew. It was very strange; it felt as though I was momentarily lifted right out of my physical body. I seemed to be suspended somehow beyond space and time, bathed in a love so intense It felt like I could have just disappear into it at any moment if It would have let me. It only lasted for a few seconds, but it seemed to last forever at the same time. I realize how crazy this must sound. The experience was so strong that at first I was afraid I was loosing my grip on reality. I finally managed to chalk it up to an over active imagination.

Three days later I got a call from my aunt telling me that this uncle we are talking about had gone into a coma and died the day I had the experience. It felt like ice water had been poured down my back when she told me this. I had lost any real ideas of God or faith and had become somewhat of an atheist. Needless to say this experience caused me to rethink some of the conclusions I had come to.

I feel blessed to now understand that even in our darkest confusion something loves us so much that it went out of its way to assist me and bring me back to a state of absolute certainty about Gods love for us.
During the experience it seemed like there was a vast amount of information that I was somehow allowed access to. One thing that I came away from this experience understanding beyond any shadow of a doubt was that any Idea that God is unhappy with us or would judge or allow us to be punished for any reason is simply impossible.

I can’t explain the love I felt with words. They simply don’t make words big enough or complete enough to do this. The only way I can begin to convey this love to you is to say that there was simply nothing else there. Nothing but love. No hint of judgment, no displeasure of any sort. It is as though God sees us as being as perfect as we were the day we were created. It is only in our confused idea of ourselves that we seem to have changed.

I hope this is of some help to you. Good luck. Love and blessings.

Your brother don

Answer 8

True happiness comes through salvation. What good is a few years (her last) of peace when she'll spend eternity in hell? God has put you in her path for a reason and that is to lead her to Him. Don't focus on a TEMPORARY happiness solution, focus on her PERMINENT happiness.

Answer 9

If her will was to be as such, then nobody could help.
But, as a believer you can pray for her soul, with or without her presence. If some person on earth loves her, we realize that God even loves her much more.

Answer 10

what kind of person is she? is she kind ? well regardless, u should console her and comfort her in the present, dont worry her about the afterlife, afterall she has her own opinions about it(as does everyone) and you should just focus on cheering her up, its not hard, talk to her about life etc u dont have to impose ur faith on her.