Does anyone know of any great parenting books...?

Question

Does anyone know of any great parenting books that show different techniques to parenting? Including them all (spanking vs. not spanking, letting them cry out vs. not letting them cry out) without making another technique bad--or not able to be used and is strictly factual. Something that also shows how this effects a child's behavior in later life.

I have the "What to Expect..." series and would like something else. I'm not much for parenting guides but I'm doing a big research project/speech for school--that counts for a big part of my grade. While I have my own views on parenting I would like my speech and project to not be biased because I am a parent and of course I feel I am doing what is "right" for my children.

Feel free to leave any comments on what you as a parent with grown children or what you as an adult experienced while growing up that had a positive/negative effect on you as an adult. I may use responses in my speech for reference.

Thank you!

Answer 1

Here are some of my favorites. I can’t think of any that don’t make the other side look bad. Usually when one writes a book they want to argue their ideas. These books do explain pros and cons of different disciplining techniques.

Children: The Challenge by Rudolf Dreikers
Presents timeless, no-nonsense advice and techniques for dealing with misbehavior using natural and logical consequences

Discipline Without Tears by Rudolf Dreikers
Stresses encouragement, cooperation, and disciplining children lovingly and effectively.

P.E.T. Parent Effectiveness Training by Thomas Gordon
Addresses issues of family communication, conflict resolution, and raising responsible children without shame or punishment.

Discipline That Works by Thomas Gordon
Provides evidence that punitive discipline and punishment are harmful to children and are ineffective as a means to fostering children’s good behavior. Provides strategies to help children control their own behavior.

Punished by Rewards by Alfie Kohn
Highly compelling argument against the use of extrinsic praise (“Good job!”), prizes, and reward systems in child rearing. Presents alternative, more effective, means to raising well behaved. Creative, highly achieving children.

Guiding Young Children by Eleanor Reynolds
Practical problem solving techniques that exclude the use of punishment, blame, or guilt. Presents techniques for developing listening skills, negotiation, conflict resolution, and setting limits.

Your Baby and Child by Penelope Leach
Comprehensive guide to the child’s physical, cognitive, social, and emotional development from birth to age five. Offers sensible advice to parents for many of the challenges commonly presented at each stage of development.

Good luck with your research and speech!

Answer 2

There is a beautiful series called "Positive Discipline" (i.e. Positive Discipline for the First Three Years, Positive Discipline for Preschoolers, etc.). This book bases it's information on the opinions of several experts, and helps parents to understand not just what YOU should do, but WHY your children do the things they do. They allow you a bit of insight into the mind of toddlers who can't yet speak well, and help to you to understand why your child does the things he/she does.

They also offer helpful alternative discipline techniques, and emphasize the point that discipline is not the same as punishment, but is instead the act of teaching right from wrong (Discipline is actually derived from the Latin word Disciple, meaning "to teach").

Good Luck!

Answer 3

Dr. William Sears has a series of books. The Baby Book (birth to two) The Sleep Book, The Discipline Book, etc..
While Dr. Sears is an advocate of attachment parenting, he is a firm believer in listening to the moms. He always says, "if you resent it, change it!". I like him because he is not heavy handed and only shares his experiences, studies and what he has learned from the mom's of his patients.
I think it would be hard to find a book that has it all. For a book to be credible it needs to be written by an "expert" and most experts choose a field, style, etc...
I am guessing they are at the library and of course the book stores.

As for the last part...something that had a positive effect on me growing up was that I knew my parents loved me, no doubt, and that they loved each other. For my mom, my dad came first and for my dad my mom came first. My parents raised us to Goooo...but in a good way...the raised us to be independent and self-sufficient but we always, always knew we could count on them.

Answer 4

Honestly Lindsey, don't use a book. Go with your instincts on what YOU know as a parent. Talk to your friends, your own parents, other relatives, co-workers, etc... who also have children. Obtain real life research, not what some doctor or psychologist writes in their opinion. But whatever you do, stay away from Dr. Spock's books! One of his son's is in prison and the other one committed suicide.

Answer 5

Parenting with Love and Logic by Jim Fay. It basically talks about establishing boundaries and teaching your child the right and wrong by having them except all consequences for their actions..its a great guide!

Answer 6

Why would you need that when you can come on here? Just kidding :-)

The only one I've used that was helpful was called "Doctor's book of home remedies for children". It has alot of things in it that are helpful for everything from chicken pox to separation anxiety.

Answer 7

Maybe the Nannie books might help. I haven't read the books myself, but have seen the shows on TV.

Answer 8

ten principles of mother-infant bonding to change the world by james w. prescott.not a book but a great start

Answer 9

All the "What to Expect" Books are wonderful. They have what to expect when expecting ...the first year...first five years...etc etc

Answer 10

what to expect and parenting love