Who's fault is it these girls turn out this way?

Question

Today on the "Maury" show, the show was titled "I'm in 9th grade and I'll do anything to get pregnant". The guests of the show were a bunch of 13/14 yr. old girls who want to become mothers now--even though they are only 13 and 14.

The girls all had their mothers there. The mothers were nice, mature, and normal women. You could tell they actually cared about their children because they would show pictures of the girls when they were younger, they would talk about how they used to have straight A's in school, etc.

Now, these girls are dressed in mini skirts and pratically using their bras as shirts. They admitted to having sex with tens or even hundreds of men and now were doing everything in their power to get pregnant.

My question is: Who's fault is it that they are like that? I mean, is it still the parents fault? The mothers all seemed like they cared and wanted "their little girls" back. Who's fault is it? Is it the parents' fault, or do some girls just end up like this?

Answer 1

You must remember this is a TV show. They do need ratings--some or most of it is probably fake or over exaggerated. I blame lots of things. Sure the parents could have fault. Schools have a fault--they are far less strict now then they were when I was in school. They may be lonely, depressed, or upset about their lives. They may have been raped at an early age and now are just experiencing the side effects. There are so many things that could have gone "wrong" but the girls are not admitting to them which is general during the teenage years when they "know everything." As a teenager I got into trouble (not with sex or anything like that) and looking back now I honestly don't know of a single thing my parents ever could have done differently.

Also I believe we need to stop playing the blame game with teens these days. It seems at times regardless of their up bringing they still can turn out good or bad--it's their decision.

Answer 2

I think it is a little of both. The parents should be in total control at the ages of those children. What they are allowed to wear shows a little about how the parents treat them. If the parents allow them to look like hookers then what really makes you think that they care about the sex their kids are having? People can seem normal, nice, and mature on t.v. but how are they in real life? At 13 and 14 kids are going through all kinds of changes, they see babies on TV and decide they need one. They are also around their friends who are doing the same things, so they want to also. However, they are old enough to know better. I put more on the parents though because they are the adults. They shouldn't be buying their kids clothes like that and they definitely shouldn't allow their kids alone with boys so much they are having multiple partners. Lack of attention from home could also be the problem. As for the, "where are the dads" i keep seeing, I was raised without my father and didn't turn into a child like those you seen on TV. I think a 1 parent household can do just as well as a 2 parent one. I think it just has to do with how the kids are being raised by those parents. And from what you say, those ones aren't raising their kids so well.

Answer 3

its actually the parents fault be it the father or the mother. some parents try to be over bearing causing their children to rebel and do as they please while others try to be the "cool parent" and give their child anything they want causing the child to feel neglected and possibly unloved because the parent shows no reguard for their safety its not that the child doesnt know these things will hurt them its the fact they are testing the parent to see if they care enough about them to do anything about it the teenage years are rough to deal with children through because of raging hormones and mixed emotions that they may not understand so they lash out at what they see as an authoritive figure partially to try to gain leverage over them. both overbearing and neglectfull parenting can cause this kind of reaction in a child it is a bit more rare than the norm but it happens at times

Answer 4

I think a lot of parents try to be strict when the kids turn 13-15 to hold them back. I was strict right from the start and they knew what was right and wrong. There were always consequences at home. I don't see these girls having any consequences. Their mothers (and dads) should show them what real life is like. They obviously don't know. If they are forced to take care of themselves, (like buy their own clothes, laundry soap, etc.) they would see that they still have a lot to learn.

Answer 5

Well, I have seen these episodes, and almost ALL of these parents have no father. A 2 parent home is CRUCIAL to raising a kid. Having kids out of wedlock, or getting married to young and having kids with a guy that chances are will not be the so call "one" (the "one" is such a BS concept), or getting married without even knowing the guy and then having kids is causing these problems!!! These girls are this way because the were pushed to the side because their parents are to concerned about their lives and being "comfortable" then paying attention to the lives they created. To many people in this society are greedy, self centered f******!!!!

Answer 6

The problem here is not a 'moral' one.

The issue we're looking at here isn't why these girls are having sex.

Its why they think having a baby at their age is a good idea. These girls are living completely detached from reality. They are setting themselves up to likely not finish high school, giving up any kind of social life, they will lose their friends, and have to devote their entire life to their newborn. I have a very hard time believing these girls have a realistic grasp on what is involved in being a single teen mother who hasn't even finished high school. My wife said she found it hard enough being a mother at 30 with a supportive husband and a decent family income. These girls are looking to walk into a brutally difficult situation that will not fully resolve for decades.

They need a wake up call. They need to spend a week living with a newborn. I imagine most of them will be on birth control in a flash.

Answer 7

I don't think that it's just the mothers who are at fault. The fathers have a big role in this too. I do think that somewhere along the lines the communication stopped between them and that's where it all went down hill. You can't entirely blame the mothers but you can't exclude them either. No matter how innocent they seem to be on that show you don't really know what the home life is like for those kids.

Answer 8

I suppose that the parents have some of the responsibility, but I always wonder....How long do we blame the parents? Until the child is 18, 20? I think a parent could try to instill what is right or wrong, have the child face the consequences of their actions, etc...but you cannot control another person's behaviour. A 13 or 14 can make bad choices, repeatedly....
Don't get me wrong, I do believe that parents have a HUGE influence on their children...but does mom get blamed forever?

Answer 9

It is there parents fault, and keep in mind that an absent dad is a huge issue. So is a mom that doesn't properly discipline. Most single moms don't because it was the dad's job when they were together. Not knocking single moms, I am a custodial dad of 3 I know what it is like. When family's break up the dynamics change and parents need to be able to adapt to compensate, when they don't they end up on Maury.

Answer 10

It has to be the parents to some extent- how are these little girls able to have sex with all these guys if their parents are so involved, why are they dressing the way they do if they aren't allowed to wear things like that. I think their parents do care but I also think they are too busy to deal with it until it is too late. These little girls are left unsupervised and have decided to have babies to love, to get attention and to have a bond with. Their fathers are missing from this also. It is a bigger difference in a girls life if her dad is missing when it comes to this type of behavior. Thanks goodness I only have boys!!! These little girls seem to grow up too fast anymore.