Is there something wrong wit a 38 year old who still goes clubbing every weekend. He's got two kids to two different women. He's good looking, has a great job. I was dating him, until he started ignoring me for no good reason or until he got his leg over a couple of times (everything was great between us). If he's doing this at 38, what do you think the problem is?
2006-10-19 07:39:14 · 46 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
By the way, I'm 22. He's a bit of a playboy, but at 38, there's a problem, plus I know he can't get a girl better than me
2006-10-19 07:43:52 · update #1
Thanks for your advice x x
2006-10-19 08:03:16 · update #2
First if he was such a great guy he wouldn't have ignored you "for no good reason", second what PROOF do you have that he wasn't married twice (2)? Men lie, especially to you girls like you. You said you're 22 years old, and "the best thing to happen to him" well sweetie he's had a lot of 22 yr old girls who thought the same thing.
The real question is what's wrong with a 22 yr old girl who wants to date a man that's 16 yrs her senior. Now, I could see it at 30 and 46, believe it or not you WILL mature through your 20's. Like it or not the older men get the more insecure they become, they start looking for a young thing to put on their arm, makes them feel better about getting older. Or is it because you'll do things with him/for him that an older, more mature, more secure woman wouldn't do, and for good reason.
But the question I wanted to ask was what is the attraction to a 40 yr old man and 20 something girl? Is it the prestige? Does he make you feel older, more mature?
From a womans point of view, any 38 yr old guy who's hanging out in young bars, "clubing" and picking up young chicks is creepy. More than likely a woman his own age wouldn't have anything to do with him, he can only relate to younger people.
2006-10-19 08:02:55 · answer #1 · answered by Stephie 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd say he, most likely, grew up around alot of women, maybe several sisters, got a real good education, and completely understands the disadvantages in our society, (U.S.) of being
married...He realizes that you can be a complete, and happy person,
friend, mate, father, etc with out an antiquated and unfair membership in the establishment of marriage..and also understands that variety is the spice of life....if a great relationship with one woman is good, then a great relationship with many women is great...
We are a disposable society, jobs, interests, friends, partners, etc., as well as our constant need for change (homes, cars, hobbies, fast food,) make it all most impossible for a one on one long term relationship to work..Your 38 yr old man know this and is smart enough to avoid the pitfall marriage has become for the American male...
What you see is what you get...enjoy while you can, nothing lasts forever, except dirt.
That's my 2 cents, don't take it personal.
2006-10-19 08:04:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
my brother in law was 35 when he got married. Hadn't dated a lot, but met Ms Right, and the rest was history. My brother dated a lot and was okay with the idea of marriage, but ended up breaking up with some girls rather than progress towards it, until he found Ms Right. He was... thirty-two. a former boss was 38, he said. Had been career focused until that point. Different strokes for different folks, huh?
2016-05-22 02:37:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He likes being a playboy. Enjoy it for what it was and move on. Do not call him! The same thing happened to me once, and the rejection hurt a lot, but if he wants to see other people there is nothing you can do about it. Your not the only girl he has done this to, and you wont be the last. It will catch up to him though. I don't care how much money a guy has, at 38 he is definitly going to be the old man at the bar, everyone is making fun of. He is going do die a bitter lonely old man.
2006-10-19 07:49:02 · answer #4 · answered by dumbblond 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
He may have a problem with commitment. What's the reason he's not with his childrens' mothers? He could have been hurt in the past by a woman. Or might like to live the life of a bachelor.
2006-10-19 07:43:00 · answer #5 · answered by Branded with the Dark Mark 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Two kids by two different women, and still goes clubbing at 38, sounds like a scumbag to me. This guy is a womanizer, just looking for sex, I seriously doubt he wanted those kids, but was too irresponsible to wear a condom. Stay FAR FAR away from him, lest you become pregnant or just another notch on his belt.
2006-10-19 07:42:07 · answer #6 · answered by Zach S. 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Possible reasons:
1) committment phobie
2) Having too much fun playing the field
3) Mamma's boy
4) Bi-sexual
2006-10-19 07:42:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's probably not married because he starts ignoring women for no good reason after he's been dating them for a while. There could be any number of reasons that he's doing that (fear, isn't interested in staying with only one woman, ADHD, ect) - but you can't change any of them, only he can, and only if he wants to.
2006-10-19 07:42:13 · answer #8 · answered by Jess 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The trick is to focus on yourself - what do you want and what do you need?
If he's ignoring you, that's a bad sign.
Move on, and don't even waste any time thinking about him.
Find a man who meets your needs.
2006-10-19 07:42:33 · answer #9 · answered by a_blue_grey_mist 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've met or seen (online) in the past few yrs more middle aged guys that claim to have never been married. I would wonder about the desire or ability to commit of anyone that age (or older) that had never been married or in a long term (several years long) relationship.
2006-10-19 07:41:40 · answer #10 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋