I have no bridesmaid that instantly comes to mind.
Here are my choices, help me decide please.
1. Friend. My friend for about a year. She is not a very good friend, but is my only female friend. I do not think she is very supportive of my marriage and is jealous. I do not agree with her lifestyle, but do not judge her outside my own thoughts.
2. Cousin. I really like my cousin a lot, but don't talk to her outside of the holidays. She is also very very tall.
3. My sister. She is 14. Our groomsman choosen is over 50.
4. Have none. This would be asking my husband to give up his.
5. Other.... any suggestions?
2006-10-19 06:22:53 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
First forget about the "ideal" that wedding magazines and wedding planners try to cram down our throats. The only important thing is the actual marriage, everything else is just window dressing. Height, weight, age, balance, etc. do not matter; choose the attendant(s) you will be most comfortable with.
From your description, I would not choose your friend. The relationship does not sound appropriate for this. Use your cousin or sister if you want, but the maid of honor and best man usually sign as witnesses and your sister may be ineligible for this task because of her age. She could still be your maid of honor, but another adult might have to be the witness. You could have just one attendant or multiple male attendants. If you're really undecided, put out a few feelers among friends and family; you might discover someone who wants to do this that you haven't thought about. Make the final decision yourself. My sister was only my maid of honor because it was expected not because we were close. That is one of only two things I would change about my wedding if I could go back and do it over. The other would have been giving my godparents a greater role.
2006-10-19 09:26:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, what a tough situation. Well let me ask you a question: Do you have to have both of you sides even?
I would say if you want your friend in there then you should put her last because she doesn't sound supportive but if I were you I wouldn't ask her because you really want somebody who is supportive of your marriage that is what this whole thing is about.
As for your maid-of-honor I would ask the person that is around the most, the one that is the most supportive and you think will always be there for you.
I think you should put your sister in there. I went through a debate with my mom on this one and I ended up putting her in there and I couldn't have made a better choice. Who cares about how old the other people are?
What about his family? Does he have any sisters? Do you have any church members that you are good friends with?
If you don't mind the sides being uneven then you can have some girls up front and then he can have his 5 girls. I am trying hard to come up with some ideas but since I don't know you it is really hard! If you would like some more help feel free to send me an email! I will be glad to email back and forth and figure this thing out for your wedding!
2006-10-19 07:21:30 · answer #2 · answered by glitter3317 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey, not anything says you need to permit any person understand approximately the interior you, and the way you suppose, proper now. They most effective have the proper to understand while making a decision to inform them, and if you do not decide on to try this simply but, than that is good enough. Don't do it. Your pal is getting married and that is a groovy factor. She shall be completely happy, and you are going to be completely happy for her. That does not have some thing to do together with your long term plans, whether or not you married or no longer, so why draw the ones parallels? This is whatever in her lifestyles that she has requested you to take facet in. You might attend her marriage ceremony as a visitor, proper? Being within the occasion is a fair larger honor, and also you must simply take it as such. She values you as a pal, simply as you're. Take that as such too! Given time I suppose you are going to discover your enthusiasm for her marriage ceremony, and could have a satisfactory time at it. For now, you're simply soul looking and feeling a bit of funky. Chocolate remedies nearly the whole lot. I suggest copious quantities, mixed with looking cartoons to your pj's, after which going for a stroll within the sunshine. Take care.
2016-08-31 23:28:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard one...You certainly only want to choose people who will support you during this important time, there is no room for jealousy! What about your mom as a maid of honor? Your little sister could always be a Jr. bridesmaid and the bridesmaid's height won't matter-all eyes should and will be on you! I'm not sure how much time you actually have but don't make any rushed decisions, and don't focus so much on the number of your bridesmaids being even with the groomsmen, yes it's traditional but it's not worth you having to pick random girls as your bridesmaids so it's really not that important.
2006-10-19 06:37:48 · answer #4 · answered by my_belovd 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe someone from your work who is over 50 as well . What is with all these ppl having symetrical weddings. By that i mean all the ppl have to match.? I did not have that and mine turned out just fine. You know what I have had 3 couples that attended our wedding get married . They were some of the oddest couples you could have found anywhere. So just figure something out . Maybe you have an aunt that is over 50? I think you can come up with something. Good luck and god bless.
2006-10-19 08:48:43 · answer #5 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd say your sister - she'll probably be really touched and might even be hurt if you didn't include her. She doesn't have to really have much contact w/ the best man, so the age thing doesn't matter much.
Or your Mom? Or his family? Or move away from best man / maid of honor and just choose honored witnesses - he can keep his best man as his and you can choose anyone - male or female as yours.
Avoid the friend who is not supportive. The cousin would be fine as well.
2006-10-19 08:29:54 · answer #6 · answered by cmc1217 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would ask your cousin and your sister. Even though your sister is young, she is still your sister and it would be nice to include her. She only has to walk with the groomsmen and pose for some pictures, so the age difference shouldn't be a problem. Do you have any close male friends? They can also be your attendants (or bridesmen, as they are sometimes called). Also, you don't have to have the same number of attendants as your groom has. You might also consider having some of his family as your attendants if he has a sister.
2006-10-19 06:59:48 · answer #7 · answered by Blue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really need to figure out who you will be most comfortable with standing next to you when you are getting married. You don't want to feel uncomfortable while you and your future husband are getting married. Even if you choose to go with your 14 year old sister, it doesn't matter that your husband to be groomsmen is over 50, no one will care. Getting married is about you and your future husband and what makes you two happy. Good luck and congratulations.
2006-10-19 08:56:28 · answer #8 · answered by rainydayislandgirl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Out of those I'd pick the cousin. But also make sure the bridemaid you do choose is responsible cause responsibilities do come with the role. Good luck!
2006-10-19 08:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by luckee137 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
how about the cousin and the 14 year old
my wedding i had ages 9 - 26 (5 girls)
your friend doesn't sound like someone who should even be going to the wedding since she is jealous of you
2006-10-20 05:09:29 · answer #10 · answered by Jenn 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋