Is The Mother Responsible When Her Child Gets Molested?? (Follow Up)?

Question

I think most of you completely misunderstood my question.

First of all, let's get one thing out of the way. Yes, the molestor is the one ultimately at fault for doing what child molestors do. No question about that.

But, if you read the news and you read studies, you will find that about 1 in 4 females in America, has been sexually molested as a child. And over 75% of them were molested by someone that was either in the family or was considered a friend of the family.

Is everyone still following me? Good.

Now, if mothers - ALL mothers - just became a little bit smarter and stopped being so gullible and trusting, then they could prevent over 90% of the molestations happening today.

Mothers should simply not leave their children around men unsupervised. Period

Now I know there are a few female molestors, but compared to men the ratio is tiny.

As far as fathers being responsible too. I would say yes. But ultimately, the mother is the one who has to step up, because some...

fathers themselves are molestors. Only the mother can be totally trusted with her child. And yes, there are mothers who kill their kids etc....I know this. But I'm talking about 99.999% of the time.

The mother has the one making the good judgement, because fathers are often themselves the ones committing the crime.

And no, I'm not saying mothers should escort their kids to the bathroom at the mall or sit with them at school. That's not what I said.

I said just don't leave you child unsupervised with any male.

There are hopefully no males in the female bathroom at the mall, and there are plenty of people at school, so mothers don't need to be there.

I'm simply saying that if all mothers stopped leaving their kids with any male unsupervised, then, most molestations would be prevented.

Oh, and to the girl who said she was molested by her mother's boyfriend while her mother was "cleaning up,".....um, I would say your mother was at fault for that. She was stupid.

Answer 1

I agree with you 100%. I have two daughters and I won't even leave them at a soccer practice without my supervision. I absolutely trust no one and tell them they are not allowed to be in their classrooms alone with any adults. I think parents these days are too trusting and automatically give adults their trust before it has been earned. All it takes is for me to not be paying attention one time, and it could happen. I also feel that the father is responsible as well, to protect his children too, but I am not going to relax because I don't trust him to be as diligent with these things like I am.

Answer 2

I do not believe the mother/father is responsible unless s/he knew it was happening and let it continue or was the molestor. Sooner or later you have to trust someone, because you simply can't always be there to watch over your child. The father is someone whom you should be able to trust. No one goes into a relationship if they think the man is going to be a child molestor. A father also has just as much responsibility in protecting the child as the mother.

A mother/father can do preventitive measures such as not let a child around known molesters or people that allowed the molestation to continue. A parent can also make sure they know the person they are leaving their child with. Also, a parent can talk to their child about not letting anyone touch their private areas and what to do if they feel threatend such as scream really loud. A child should also be encouraged to hang out in groups of 3 or more boys and girls and not to be alone in a room with an unknown adult or teacher/coach.

In the end it is the mother and father's responsibility to watch out for the child, but they can not be blaimed for a child molestation. There sometimes is just know way to know it would occur. Molester's can be female or male, be friend, family, or stranger, 92 or 6 years old, any race, color, or nationality, have an exterior personality of a saint or monster, and seem like the most trustworthy person in the world. There is just know way to know who may or may not molest your child.

Answer 3

Yes, a mother can keep her child from being molested in PREVENTABLE and forseeable situtations.
A mother leaving her child with a sister and the sister having a boyfriend mother didn't know about coming over is unforseeable.
A mother leaving her child with the boyfreind is forseeable and preventable.
I agree with you, I would not leave my daughter (OR SON) with even a male relative, because I don't trust men. I don't.
But as a survivor of that, I am very supersensitive about those things.
Women do molest. They do. My good friend in middle school blew me away when she told me that her mother french kissed her at the age of 5. It does happen.
When someone has been molested for a long time, they run a really high risk of doing it themselves. It is a horrible, vicious cycle.
But bottom line, wrong or not, my little girl won't be left alone with any male. She even sits next to me in church, I know wolves come in sheep's clothing way too often.
But no matter what, a women shouldn't be blamed for the actions of another. Not everyone can walk around being paranoid about every man. I am just that way because of my past.

Answer 4

A lot of times molesters spend months or even years infiltrating themselves into the lives of the family before they actually molest the child. They will pick out the single mother at church or somewhere else where they can try to approach you to make friends. These sick people know how to manipulate you and your child and take a long time building up trust so that they can eventually spend time alone with your child. After getting to know someone for a year or two you might agree to let little Johnny go on a fishing trip or to the movies with him because he has deceived you and knew all the right things to say and do to make you trust him. I think in the end, you just have to protect your children the best you can and start teaching them at a very early age what is inappropriate. Make sure you explain to your children that nothing bad will happen to them or you if they tell you something, as long as they are telling the truth, since a lot of molesters threaten to hurt the child or parents if the child tells. Also make sure to let your child know that it would never, ever be their fault and they would never be in trouble for telling you that someone tried to touch them.

Answer 5

I agree that at times a mother is mostly at fault. I have a two year old daughter and I am very strict on who is around her. I only let certain people I trust around her when I am not there. When it comes to a male around her I don't leave no matter who it is. I don't trust any males except her grandpa, her father, and my brother. Thats it. I read about womens men molesting their child and it tears me up. Some of the women knew what was going on and they deserve to be shot just as well as the molester, but in some cases the women don't know it at all. Its really sad and they all need shot. I don't even let people touch her at walmart. They try to be cute with her and I tell them that she hates strangers so they back off. People are really creepy. I feel really sorry for any child with a stupid mother and perverted dad. I think laws need to be stricter. In the town I lived and now work in there is a cop who was arrested for molesting his step daughter. He got out of it and is now transfering jobs to somewhere else. Where he is going I don't know, but hopefully somewhere where he has a better chance of getting shot. So I do agree half of the mothers are at fault. If they really know there kid they should know something is going on that should't be.

Answer 6

I would say that the mother definitely has to open her eyes and be aware of everyone around her children. It is impossible to watch them every minute of every day. At school, for instance they are around many adults in a supervisory position who could readily take advantage of them. I can't be there at school. What about the ministers who we are supposed to trust. The point is: To some degree, yes a mother is responsible, but there are many aspects of a child's life where the mother can not be there to protect them all the time. We also, as adults, believe that we can trust certain people in an authoritative position with our children such as: teachers, ministers. It is a horrible thing that we have to even have a discussion on a matter like this. Too much is happening to too many children these days.

Answer 7

"any male"?????? your talking about even there father??

I haven't read your first question yet but it sounds like you may have been a victim yourself, if that is the case then I am very sorry for your pain.

I think I know a little where your coming from. A lot of mothers should they had a better head on there shoulders could have prevented there kids molestation. But remember bad men seek out these kind of women (weaker, abused)

I am sorry though, I have 3 girls and they spend quite a lot of time with there dad. I fully trust him, otherwise we wouldn't be married. I am not going to supervise my daughters when there with the one person i know would put his life before there's with out a second thought. The only fear I have of my husband is what he would do to someone should they harm one of his "Ladies"

Answer 8

How would you like to be a father and not be able to be left alone with your child? That is what you are saying, "Mothers should simply not leave their children around men unsupervised. Period" I completely disagree. I have a 15 month old and my husband would absolutely die if I wouldn't let him alone with her. My father also loves being with my daughter. I believe that PARENTS should take extra care of protecting their children. I would never let my daughter alone with a stranger, but I wouldn't dream of supervising every visit she makes to her papa's or when she's with her daddy. Chances are that most PARENTS are not going to let their child go with just anybody and in the rare case that they do, they should be held responsible. Both mother and father.

Answer 9

Ok, that is not true. A lot of people get molested at school or at church (I did). You would have to know every single move your child makes ya know! Also if your child is a boy then they go to the mens bathroom it could happen there, that happened to my ex when he was a child. It is not the mothers fault unless the mother is completly neglective or has something to do with it.

Answer 10

As others have spoke of, you are able to record an attraction and/or ***** to the judicial ethics board. even with the undeniable fact that, in case you propose on taking the 2d determination, you are able to communicate it along with your criminal expert because of the fact your "criminal diagnosis" that's a humorous tale. First, the courtroom case you cite is a Washington State case, analyzing Washington State regulation. It has NO precedent fee in Texas. Judges can take the dicta into attention, even with the undeniable fact that that's no longer binding, and a Texas decide has to obey Texas regulation till that's challenged. Secondly, the regulation you cite is irrelevant - it has no longer something to do with testimony the decide did or did no longer pay attention. the only undertaking it grants for is criminal or civil effects, which do no longer rely on your custody listening to. i do no longer understand no rely if or no longer the decide made the right determination. even with the undeniable fact that, by ability of spouting this nonsense you fairly needless to say show which you have no longer any theory what you're conversing approximately.