Why do some men cheat on their wives?

Question

I accidently came to know that my father is having relationship with another women.My mom dosn't know abt this. He was really a very nice person and he showed so much love towards me and my mom.I never expected him to do such things.I dont know what to do.Should i say this to my mom?

Answer 1

Remind your dad nicely: God hates cheating. Cheating is immoral. If he repents and changes, it is ok, God will forgive.

In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives you air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives you water to drink and food to eat.
God gives you a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves you, and you are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
(Digestion of above can even prevent depression and suicide attempt.)

Answer 2

Let your father know you know, and tell him you won't tell mom unless he buys you a new car or gives you a large sum of money. NOT! Just kidding! It is hard for you to know exactly why this is happening. Sometimes men have the "mid-life crisis" syndrome where they are terrified of aging and they have to get acknowledgment from younger women, or maybe the wife is having menopausal lack of sexual drive, and that is affecting their sex life. It could be any number of things. You must handle this very carefully. The very first thing I would recommend is not tell either parent, but go to a trusted advisor, an adult you trust more than any others, and ask for their advice how to handle this situation. If you can't think of anyone, I would suggest your counselor at school, because this person could be held accountable if they don't handle it professionally. I would NOT recommend a good friend of either parent. Maybe even ask the counselor to talk to your parents for you so you don't appear to be taking one's side over the other. If he/she won't agree to do this, ask if they know someone who will talk to your parents. I would NOT recommend going to the police about this because you may open a huge can of worms which you may regret later. Practice compassion and forgiveness with your parents, both of them. Everyone makes mistakes from time to time and the answer is not to do harm to them but help them rise above it. Good luck and I hope everything turns out well for your family. I also like the responses of mrtray and Spoilt999.

Answer 3

On the assumption that you are young and dependent upon your parents, meaning they are paying your rent. This is grown folk business and very difficult for you understand why he is doing what he is doing. There is no one answer or even a few answers only your father knows why it is that he is doing what he is doing. I in your case, would sit back and evaluate the stiuation, how it is effecting family life, are there major problems as a result of this. Then I would carefully sit down with your father after concrete proof and discuss it with him. That would be the first step beyond that would be determined as a result of the with the sitdown with your father. I would not, by all means go to your mother prior.

Answer 4

Sorry to say that men do not have to have a reason to cheat! Women on the otherhand are normally lacking something when they cheat: attention, affection, romance, communication, sex, etc. Women in happy relationships dont cheat the majority of the time. Men can be in a happy relationship and still cheat because they do not think the way women do. Men do think with their other heads.....and they don't have to have a reason to cheat........If you know your mom is unhappy in her marriage then I would say something to her about it. Realize though that this will probably be very traumatic....If she is happy though; dont say anything to her about it. I would, however, say something to your father. Some people may say that it isnt your business, but it is in a way because you care about your mom and you dont want her to get hurt.

Answer 5

Because men are always and forever thinking with their little head and not their big head. Then they say "I am sorry", but what they really mean is they are sorry they got caught, if they get caught, but eventually, as stupid as they can be when they choose this behavior they will.
I can't stand cheaters. Women or men for that matter. I have zero tolerance. Its easier to and more classier to walk away first then play. My Dad caused my Mom to have a nervous breakdown because of his constant , never ending cheating habits and I swore to God, I would never ever want to do that or be like him in any way shape or form.

Answer 6

Generally ladies hate lust, addiction and gambling. Therefore such persons have no other way than to cheat their wives.
At present you avoid telling your mom directly but ask her in flow of such subject that if it happens with her what action she will take. If she opts divorce and if there is no financial problem then you can tell, that too by confirming thrice. But remember well that as soon as you reveal it your family atmosphere will be spoiled.

Answer 7

When you promise to be faithful to someone at the wedding ceremony,.... unfortunately it doesn't mean that someone actually means it. Sad, but true. Being faithful is a choice. Most don't have self discipline enough to actually stick to that promise.
Let me ask you this: how did you feel when you found out... let's say from a scale 1-10 (ten is worst).... if the answer is 10- your Mom will feel 10X1000. Do you want to spare her that pain? I beg you to spare her. Have mercy on her.... when she is happy- be happy for her and imagine how much of that spunk would be wiped out, if you told her about your Dad's unfaithfulness. The thing with adultery is that it's the adulterer who has a problem (doesn't have self-discipline)... but she will start blaming herself and she will feel so down at all time for a loooooong time- her self esteem will be totally affected. Don't do that to her.... practice self discipline on this one: do not tell her no matter what!!!! Talk to your Dad instead. Tell him that you know.

Answer 8

You are in a really difficult situation. I would tell your father to tell your mother or you will. Are you sure your mom doesn't know? Many women know but don't want to admit it because then they'll be forced to deal with the situation or else look like a complete fool and it may be better for them for a variety of reasons to stay in the marriage.

Answer 9

oh, tough. Realize tho his relationship with this other woman has nothing to do with the relationship and love he has for you. It should have no bearing on how you think he feels for you.

I would tell your mom. She needs to know. You care about her, but you also care about your dad, so you may feel stuck in the middle. I would want to know if my fiance was cheating on me...wouldn't you? As much as it is going to hurt her it will be better for her in the long run.

I'm not really sure why men cheat. Maybe they feel old and unattractive and need to prove they are still attractive by going to someone else? Maybe there are probs in the marriage and its their way of getting away from it?

The bottom line is do what you feel in your heart is the right way to go. You are going to hurt someone, and be hurt, by spilling the beans none the less. But imagine how mom is going to feel if she finds out some other way, and realizes you knew about it all along!

Answer 10

Saying that to your mom will complicate things more, there might be some misunderstanding, but if there isnt then you should discuss this with your dad, and tell him about the consequences. If he really loves you and your mother he'll quit cheating for good!