whats this mean, please help?
ok about a month ago, i spilled my guts to one of my friends, told her that i like her alot, and all this stuff, shes only 13. well she wrote me back and said she hasnt ever seen us as more thanfriends, and that she dont like me like that but she dont want it to ruin our 8 year frendship.. well..over the past month, I've been avoiding her, simply for my sake, just simply not to bring those feelings back up, cuz when I'm around her they all come back. but she emailed me yesterday, and said she was sad, becauze it was straining our friendship. and she wants things like they used to be, well i told her why i had been avoinding her, and she said she totatlly understood why. well, I know she dont like me like that now, but am I crazy to think there mite be sumthin in the future, cuz she was obvioulsy ( she said) she was really sad, seeing us like this, and since shes only 13, am i crazy to think there mite be sumthin in the next year or two? she also said, " dont take the rejection to heart
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13 minutes ago
that the reason was probably stupid anyway, whats that mean?
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3 days ago
and for those who say, I am punsihing her, I am not in any way. We have had very friendly discussions, and she understands why, things have been this way. And I have reassured her, promised her, that I will make things the way the used to. Do u really think I want to lose the friendship as well? I mean, that hurts.
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12 hours ago
I mean, its not like I'm ugly, I'm very atractive, and so is she. I mean I'm fit, I play varsity baseball, and am only a sophmore, It's not like I'm a geek or anything. And the same with her, she is very good lookin, has guys hitting on her all the time, and is on the national swim team, I just dont know what to do, cuz i swear to god i love her more than anything in this world
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3 days ago
i mean i just cant get over her, I have never in my life, liked anyone, or felt so strongly for somone. Believe me, this isnt a crush, I have had many, but htis is more
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4 days ago
but, since me and her are friends again, we were talking about this girl who likes me, but i dont like her... and the girl i like, said i should just tell her i wanna stay friends, just incase i ever change my mind....?? which is the exact same thing she told me.. what it mean??
2006-10-19 03:33:59 · 14 answers · asked by robinson z 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I really do think there is potential for her to like you "like that" in the future, yes. You scared her a bit by giving her all your heart like that. Now you seem like a sure thing because you like her (save yourself from that). Plus you may seem weak, because you just showed your weak side. (Nice, but she wants strength.) I believe you that this is more, so play it smart. She will notice you, so don't look at her to see if she is looking at or noticing you. Do your homework on what will make you a more attractive guy, and do it. Since you have a good established friendship, focus now on the superficial things that make guys your age sexy. Jocks may be cool, but who is actually getting the girl? Even if it is some superstar? Imitate, but only on the surface. Stay you on the inside. This sounds dumb but is what it will take to turn the friendship into more. Girls can be so sure that they want to be friends, but sometimes guys can turn that completely around by just being irresistable. Even the most difficult girls are really easy if you just find the right key. Good luck to you. Be careful about focussing to much on her, remember to focus on you, that is what she will see.
2006-10-19 03:59:31 · answer #1 · answered by LadyPom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of telling you what to do, let me drop some wisdom on you:
1) friends make the best lovers
2) 13 year olds may not be ready for real relationships--she has a crush on three guys: a movie star, a rock star, and the same guy all 50 girls in her class do, and doesn't think in real terms about having a boyfriend.
3) Friendships fizzle with time anyway, don't worry about ruining anything by starting a relationship.
3.5) Don't hide from her/avoid her because she doesn't like you that way. Accept that she doesn't, and work on making yourself more attractive generally, rather than trying to get her. Hang around her as much as possible without being her lost puppy dog following her everywhere.
4) If she isn't attracted to you, telling her how much you like her won't change that. Nothing is less attractive than being needy. Even if you are a cool guy otherwise, the more she thinks you need her, the less she will like you. You two shouldn't 'need' each other until you have a much deeper relationship. (Exception: you could try blowing her away with a grand, romantic, Cassanova gesture, but if it doesn't work, you are done with her--I don't advise it.)
4.5) Logic doesn't work here--don't argue a case for yourself. Just be attractive and wait until she becomes attracted.
5) You aren't ready for five yet!
6) If she isn't attracted to you, date or at least flirt with other women. One of the big differences between men and women is that women think that a man who is with women is hotter than a man without women. Therefore, if you start hanging around a lot of women and date some cute ones, your friend will start thinking you are a hottie and might try to steal from the girls you are flirting with. (Weird--I know--a guy sees a hot girl with a bf and thinks it will be so much trouble to steal her away from him that he should look for someone single--women don't think like that though! They think a single guy is one who can't get a girl!)
I just saw Lady Pom's answer--she knows her stuff too!
2006-10-19 03:58:40 · answer #2 · answered by wayfaroutthere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you guys have been friends for a long time is whats probably making her think twice about getting any closer with you. You gotta look at what can happen and what you will be giving up here. If you guys did end up going out... ull have ur goodtimes & all, but what if you guys breakup oneday? then what are u gonna do.... chances are u guys wont be friends anymore... or if you guys still are friends there will still be an odd vibe between you two. Losing an 8 year friendship would not be worth it at all... just stay friends w/ her, then maybe someday you guys will end up going out...but for now kick back and enjoy life!! Also the fact that u are staying away from her is really understandable.. but for how long r u gonna stay away? In the end it will all work out the way its supposed to... the saying goes "no pain, no gain." Email me if u need anymore help.
2016-05-22 01:54:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she is playing a trick on you or something. You see I believe that if she wanted you she would tell it to you clearly. It is obvious but as you refer this 2 year vacuum between you and her, this might have been an obstacle to her love for you. Nevertheless, what you have to do is to keep and hold this bond between you and her stable. You do not want to lose her and you do not want to lose that 8 year friendship too. As time passes you will discover the real aspects of saying you that.
P.S. I'm 15 too and I know how it feels. Do not hesitate to IM for further advice or information.
2006-10-19 03:39:15 · answer #4 · answered by einstein_junior 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't have the patience to read that book you wrote but I can guarantee that it will work out if you give it some time. She's only 13 now wait until she's 15 or 16 and then ask her how she feels towards you. She won't say no!
2006-10-19 03:37:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whew! You are 15, take a break. You will not fall in love until 25 or up. Take a break, date, stop trying to be so serious so soon. You do not love her. Well, you do, but first of all, you don't know what love is really like. Expierence before you start to enjoy.
2006-10-19 03:36:59 · answer #6 · answered by Love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I kow where u r comeing from but don't run from it .If she is a real friend she well understand and look passed that and still be ur friend just keep ur head up and still keep ur friendship going and if she does like u she well come round sooner then u think ok
2006-10-19 03:46:08 · answer #7 · answered by melissa_werner2002 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
poor guy, you cant make someone love you, and stay good friends who knows in a few years maybe it will click with her. She is sooo young, as u r 2 but wait a few more years let her catch up.
2006-10-19 03:38:22 · answer #8 · answered by Diana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IGHT LOOK HOMIE AM PURTORICAN AND MEXICAN AND A WAZ GOING TROUGHT THA SAME THING AND JUST STAY GOOD FRIENDS I NO YOUR PROBALY GONNA READ THIS AND JUST SAY THAT I DONT NOW HOW IT FEELZ TO LIKE OR TO JUST LOVE A PERSON WHO DOEST FEEL DA SAME WAY BOUT CHU BUT YO JUST STAY AS CLOSE FRIENDS FEELZ ME SO JUST DONT WORRUN ANYTHIN SPECIAL THAT U GUYS GOT WIT EACH OTHA FEELS ME WEN DA TIME IS RITE SHELL ACCEPT U
2006-10-19 03:42:07 · answer #9 · answered by jay d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear child give it some time. Don't push it and let God send you to her and he'll send her to you. Believe me when I tell you this because I know from experience.
2006-10-19 03:39:50 · answer #10 · answered by Chaka J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋