I need some advice from the women.?

Question

Hello,

I am 24 years old and my girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 almost 4 years. We have lived in the same apartment for 1 year. Before they we drove truck for a whole year and got along great being together 24/7 in a small box. However, two weeks ago she came to me and had a really troubled look on her face. She told me that she was feeling no longer in love with me. At first I thought I felt the sameway. But, now it is killing me, we still live in the same apartment. I truly want her back in my life with me. I asked her the other day how she is feeling about all this. She said "I dunno what I want, part of me wants to be with you. The other part of me wants to be single again." I know you can't force someone to be inlove with you. But, is there something I can try to do to bring that spark back for her? Any advice would be much help.

Thank you

Mike

I want to thank you all VERY MUCH! You have all made me feel alot better. I have made up my mind. I am going to give her the space she wants and needs. But, I will let her know that I will always be there for her at the sametime. The last hard part is we have to live in the same aprtment for 3 more months before the lease is up. that is what is going to make it harder. But, again, I am going to try what the most of you said!

Thanks so much!

Mike

Answer 1

Sorry, this is a hard situation. I would say pull away a bit, show her what life would be like without your love. Maybe once she has to go without she'll realize she wants it back.

Answer 2

Well Mike, My fiance and I were on the truck together for 1 1/2 yrs. You learn a lot about each other during that time and you both grow as a couple. Maybe she decided that she didn't want to be together anymore after being in such a confined space. Give her some room, don't pressure her, that will only make her run. Don't change who you are, be the same as always. From that, she will see that you are who you say you are. Women need to know that the person they love is always going to be there, no matter what happens or how they feel at any given moment. She really could be confused right now. Just let her be who she is.

Answer 3

Mike, I feel your pain. I've been where you are and I can tell you that it is going to hurt like hell for a long time. Right now she just seems to be confused as to what she wants. She didn't say that she didn't love you which is good, but she did say that she wants to be single again which isn't good at all. I would recommend that you allow her to be single and let her do whatever it is that she wants to do and if she isn't happy being single then you be there for her when she is hurting. Don't remind her what a good thing she has with you everyday cause it will just make her want to be free even more. Sometimes a person just needs a break from the person they are with especially after almost 4 yrs. Give her space and allow her to do what it is that she is looking for. She will be back and if she doesn't then just know that she isn't the one that God has for you in your life. Loving someone always hurts when they come to a point in their lives when they just needs space but give it to her and be patient. Now, that doesn't mean that you can't enjoy life just because the 2 of you arent' together. You make that decision but if she is worth loving then she must be worth waiting for. I hope it works out for the best. God bless.

Answer 4

This is a tough one. I think maybe you guys do need some time apart. Sounds like you are together a little or a lot too much. Maybe encourage her to be with friends and you spend time with some of yours, but keep it clear how you feel about her. That you do want this to work. I think if you give it some time, she will come around. If part of her still wants to be with you believe me she won't leave knowing that. It won't feel right. Try to find out if there are any changes that you can make to help improve the relationship. Let her know if she could make any as well. Good luck.

Answer 5

It seems the two of you spent entirely too much time together. There's nothing to talk about. When your with someone 24/7 you know everything about them. My BF and I live together, but he works days and I work nights. We only have the weekends together and we enjoy every bit of time we have. We talk about how our work is throughout the week, and things that are going on in the coming week. I'm suggesting you try to find something new about her and romance her. Change can be a good thing.

Answer 6

Think back to your first reaction which was feeling the same as her. I think that u 2 hae been together for some time that you are use 2 being with her. Ya'll got together young maybe if give eachother some space alone you can really know what you want.

Answer 7

This is tough. I am not sure why you both would be feeling ambivalent. Something is not right. Try inviting her out again. Take her to dinner. Don't wear her out talking about the relationship. Just go out to have fun. Tell her you both could use that kind of break, no strings oir expectations attached. If she is going to rediscover her passion, it will not be in long talks in the kitchen or whinning sessions from you. It will only be in the chemistry of fun and mutual interest. If that does not work, move out and start over, gracefully and kindly.

Answer 8

i am not a women .. but i can relate ... try giving each other more free time alone you said you drove a truck well you where not there all the time she had her free time and maybe when you and her are with each other do fun stuff go out with friends remember what is was like when you first met the things you's did do them again some doors in her heart are closing but that dont mean other doors cant be opened..... best of luck....i hope i helped

Answer 9

Sorry to hear about this.. it really sucks to be in this type of situation. U need to realise she obviously needs to be apart from you now. Any trying to convince her or begging her to come back is'nt gonna work. As hard as it is you gotta let some things go and if they come back it was meant to be. Pls believe me.. if shes gonna realise she wants to stay with you, shes gonna do it on her own. Hope everything works out for the best! Everything happens for a reason....

Answer 10

You could ask her to marry you. One year is long enough to play house. If she sees that you want a serious commitment, maybe she will feel differently about the siutuation. If she agrees, try a 6 month engagement to be sure you are both on the same page.