Do people who do this...is it a spur of the moment decision or is it planned for a long time. I'm trying to make some sense out of this madness. Thank you.
2006-10-19 00:38:24 · 20 answers · asked by steph h 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
First of all, let me express my condolences. Let me assure you, it wasn't 'madness'. Depression has nothing to do with insanity. Depressed folks may think they're losing their mind, but they're not. It's more about hopelessness and desperation. It is caused by an imbalance in the neurotransmitters, seratonin and norepinephrine in the brain. It's highly unlikely that it was spur of the moment decision. I was thinking about it for a long time before I attempted it (twice). Did I discuss it with anyone? No. Depressed people are reluctant to share their feelings with "normies" and these thoughts just spin around in their mind over and over. Feel free to email me if I can be of more help. Again, I'm very sorry for your loss.
It's apparent that some of these people have no idea what they're talking about. For a depressed person, it has nothing to do with selfishness, cowardice, foolishness, or anything of the sort. Please don't listen to them. If you want me to try to clarify this, let me know.
2006-10-19 00:48:56 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Peachy® 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dear steph,
Let me start by saying that I am very sorry for your loss and that suicide is not always planned or premeditated or spur of the moment usually people that commit suicide feel overwhelmed with problems and the only way they can cope is by ending it all its too bad that your husband didn't seek out help. Don't beat your self up its not necessarily your fault. Be strong for your children's sake if nothing else and you may never have an answer or want to know why. I hope that you find some peace and are strong for your self and children.
Shawn
2006-10-19 00:48:20 · answer #2 · answered by shawn_mauldin 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
From my perspective ( I tried to commit suicide 7 times) it is something that lies in one mind. Not always at the fore front but it's there. There are many contributing factors that will lead a person to think there is no way out,no solution, or no hope. But there is a rare few that had previous mental/medical problems that did it on the fly. As a survivor the first few attempts were planned, but the last few were spur of the moment. I am sorry for ever having tried. I am sorry it happened to someone you loved. Take care and God Bless you and your family.
2006-10-19 00:51:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off, I am so very sorry for your, as well as your children's lose. There are so many different reasons that someone chooses to do this. Some people do this spur of the moment and others consider this over time. But for certain there is a reason they do what they do. And you may never know why he did what he did. Some people do leave notes (letters) why they do it while others don't. I know this answer may not help you, but without knowing in fuller detail this is the best I can give you. Again my condolences to you and your kids. May God Bless you.
2006-10-19 00:49:25 · answer #4 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think a normal person with no previous thoughts of suicide just does it on the spur of the moment. He may not have planned to do it specifically on that day in that way for a long time in advance, but I would bet he was thinking a lot about committing suicide in the weeks preceding it.
I cant know for sure, of course.
I hope you are doing ok.
2006-10-19 00:43:10 · answer #5 · answered by Phil S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your loss. In my opinion, people who commit suicide, do it more on the spur of the moment. Those who plan it out, I beleive are hoping someone will intervene.
Was your husband having problems or has he been dealing with issues for some time?
2006-10-19 06:21:01 · answer #6 · answered by Wild seed 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had 2 suicide attempts. Personally, I planned the second one to the point where I read a book written by a doctor on how to effectively terminate my life. However, half way thru the process, I changed my mind about committing suicide. The first attempt at suicide was impulsive. I just starting swallowing pills and did not stop. Luckily, I did not swallow enough. The psychiatrist at the hospital told me that the second attempt where I was rationalizing suicide and planning it so rationally-that was the type of person who would succeed at suicide. I am sorry for your loss.
2006-10-19 01:00:06 · answer #7 · answered by catzrme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry about your loss, I wouldn't even know where to begin to answer your question because honestly I think for how much ever studying goes into people committing suicide the most that anybody can come up with is it is out of severe depression, if a person gets help than maybe they will make it, if they don't than they either live with depression for the rest of their lives or they commit suicide like your husband did, I don't know how someone would know wether or not a person sits around thinking about this for months or years on end or wether or not it is just a spur of the moment thing, the only person who knows that is the one who takes their own life, don't know if this will help any or not but if you would like to talk feel free to contact me
2006-10-19 00:46:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have fought depression since age 13, and am 57 now.
I think of it as a bad, impulsive solution to a temporary problem. An emotional crisis comes up. Pressure builds. Quick sometimes. You think that you can't stand it. But you can, if you believe that it will pass.
Depression lies to you that it is permanent.
I will give you the resources that I have found, ones that work for me, because it would be amazing if you did not feel some depression off of this.
Never, ever, for a nanosecond, tell yourself that you are responsible!!! He was responsible!!
For local depression support groups and phone numbers:
http://www.dbsalliance.org
You will have anxiety:
http://www.adaa.org
"The Feeling Good Book" is the best depression help. Distorted thinking causes depression, and this book has ways to stop it, and put positive things in it's place:
http://www.feelinggood.com
If you or the children ever self injure to cope:
http://www.self-injury.net
To help children understand:
http://www.survivingsuicide.com/children.htm
If it ever gets super bad:
911
1-800-SUICIDE
Ma'am, get yourself and the children counselling if you haven't, and I pray that you have. Love yourself first, it must be that way, learn to think you are a good person if you have to scream it at yourself, hug the kids, and hide nothing, grieve, and help them grieve.
Cry until you are cried out.
Email me if you want to, once, or every day!
sauronsnightmare@yahoo.com
2006-10-19 00:59:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
it can be both ways, depending on the situation. he could have been thinking of it for a long time if he had been feeling pressured over months or it could have been a spur of the moment where he had a problem he couldnt face , couldnt see his way clear of.survivors can never be sure manily because altho we love the person we cannot see into his mind. i personally feel that suicide is a cowards way out. it leaves those left behind feeling that somehow they are to blame and trust me YOU AREN'T !!! you really cannot make sense of a senseless ,selfish act. all you can do is try to put your life back together and keep going. hugs and prayers for you and your children.
2006-10-19 00:48:08 · answer #10 · answered by kayann01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋