my husband is away at basic for the army!?

Question

Hey My hubbie is gone at basic and not only am I having a hard time dealing and he has only been gone for 2 days . I do not have a address to write him yet and I am going crazy.......... What should or can I send hime any suggestion I do not want my whole letter filled with just i miss you! Any help would be appreactiated..can I send pics?

Answer 1

Hello, may I ask how your doing today...lonely and lost I'm sure...take a breath and relax...

I know the way your feeling right now...when I was 18 years old my boyfriend at the time joined the USN, (my husband of 25 years now) he was my rock...I thought the world was going to end without him...We retired from the USN 5 years ago after 20yrs...and raised our daughters in the service, they loved it...and so did I, I miss it truely a life time adventure...new friends, extended family, and travel. now retired with lifetime benefits...ask your parents about how wonderful they are...

I promise it will get easier...I would like to share some military wifes survival tips...

First of all the life you know know will sease to exsist...he is government property now...bummer...for him...he will have to do what he's told...lol...anyways...I suggest that you start writing him every night about the daily activities that go on in your life...but hold back anything unhappy or sad this will only make him worry...keep the letters light...:) this will ensure him that things are ok and your ok...reassure him how much you love and miss him daily...remind him why he's doing this, its for the betterment of your family and how much you appreciate what he's doing for you both...keep up his self esteem...boot camp is very tough and trying on the physical body, and it is also a mental game...they shave their heads and then make them wear those crappy bootcamp monkey uniforms...then they work on their nerves and break them down, only to build them back up... the way they want them to be...its kind of like really rough on them...so please keep your letters happy and up beat...they need not have the extra pressure, that your not ok...send happy pictures and sweet memories and use cologne on the envelopes...this gives the smell of home... a warm tender spot....also every night after writing the letter lick it and stamp it and write numbers on the front 1,2,3,etc...that way when you get your 1st letter, and a return address you will be able to send them all, and he will know which one to read 1st...

Later he will be able to receive care packages...this is when it gets fun...be creative send photos...send a camera and tell him to take pictures and tell him to send it back and then develope it...see what he sees its a blast...send home baked cookies...send a cute pair of panties that smells like perfume...he will get a real kick out of that...but better wait till he gets of ''A'' school for that, thats after basic...just have a blast threw the mail, a silly romantic one at that.... this will surely keep up his moral...lol...

If this is going to be a career choice and he does the full 20yrs. as we did...just remember that YOU are going to have to keep the homefront strong for both of you...you will have to be patient and when he comes home, you will have to give him space to re-adjust to home life before you concern him with all your troubles...if you have kids you will be both mom and dad so be diplomatic...and reasure everyone that this is ok, and daddy loves them...

The biggest thing, is that, it is just as hard on them as it is on you...

You will have a wonderful life, and the new friends you will meet after basic, when he goes to his first duty station, and the many more you will meet during the time you will be in service, will be the greatest friends you will ever have...they will be in the same boat as you are, and you will have a extended family and a lifes vacation at your feet...ENJOY IT!

Their is also someone you should familerise yourself with, and that is the UMSBUDSMEN...this is a leason between your husbands command and you, if you ever need anything that is who you should contact...they will have all the information on your husband and how to contact him if he's away...and they will also help you if you need anything when you are moving... in or out...they also have wives clubs...their is a abundant of resources for you once he finishes basic...so just hang in their...sweeti...

.....THE TOUGHEST JOB IN THE MILITARY, IS BEING A MILITARY WIFE.....

He loves you!!!
Enjoy your new life...and may God Bless you Both...and we appreciate the sacrifices you both are making for our Country...

If you would like to e-mail me for any reason please feel free to [e-mail]...
I used to be a Umbudsmen and I would love to help you if needed...

...God Bless...

ps.
go on myspace, their are several women on there, in your situation and they have chat rooms...this could also be of some comfort to you...several of my daughters friends are spouse lonly too! They chat on the myspace...

Answer 2

He is probably still at reception and hes waiting until he goes to his training unit to send you the address. Yes you can send pictures but, no nudity and try to send small pics. When I went through basic in 98 we were only given a small cork board for pics. Please send letters. Its a real morale booster no matter if that's all you talk about is how much you miss him. I'm not sure on all the rules now a days but, he will let you know. Just give him a few days to get you the address. It took me about a week before i finally got mine. It all depends on the filling process. Once he gets in the training portion you can send packages too. I hope this helped or will help you.

Answer 3

What my wife and I did while I was away, was to create a "diary". We would write down the things that we did that day, and then once a week we would mail it to each other. That way, we knew what was going on with the other. You can set the time for 2 days, 3 days, whatever. You will get a letter from him and it will have his address. Right now, HE doesn't even know his address. By the end of the week, he will be with his unit, and either a letter will be on the way, or he will have called with the information.

Thanks for your service

Answer 4

Justin C has the best advice for you. Try to hang in there, it's hard but there are support groups for military wives. Definitely start a letter and get some pictures together, he's missing you too. You should probably get involved in some activities outside of the house. Maybe you could join a women's bowling league or something. Good luck.

Answer 5

I am in the army and i have gone through alot of this with my wife, expect more things like this, sorry to tell you. But what you can do is start the letter and say what you wanna say in it. He will call or write you very soon, prolly in the next day, because its manditory. You can send him candy, pictures, letters, anything to keep the time going. I recommend writting alot to him and keep a cell phone so he can call it. If you want to talk more about the military life email me at [e-mail]. Good luck.

Answer 6

Sooner are later you will hear from him. And you'll get his address where you can write to him as often as you like. But I hate to be the one to break the news to you sweetie. This is only the beg. He may get deployed for long long periods of times. There's gonna be alot of time you find yourself alone in the future b/c of the career path he has choosen. But I will say this. If this is what he belives in and what he wonts to do with his life. He needs your support. He needs to know he carrys your love with him always. He needs to hear and know you'll wait on him no matter what. The time the distance nothing can separte the love you 2 hold for one another. But until you do hear from him. Write in a journal. Express yourself that way. He'll be fine and so will you... Best of luck to you and your hubbie...

Answer 7

Hi.... and calm down a little. I was off to basic at the ripe old age of 19 with the foreknowledge that my final destination was Vietnam and when I finally went there in 1968 I left behind a young pregnant wife. We too were desparate for each other and were afraid of the unknown for one another and as individuals. Do not isloate yourself. Talk to both of the families and share how you feel while you are waiting to establish contact with him. He is just as desparate to hear from you too but is likely fine. The first few days of basic training are very hectic and he isn't likely to be allowed the time to call you. BUT he will be directed and given time to write to you soon. I hope you get his address soon and you likely will. In the unlikely event that you do not hear from him in about 10 days or so contact your local Red Cross. They have workers at each chapter who are trained and have contacts that will find people in the military quickly. All you need to know in this instance is that he is on whatever base and in basic. (It is helpful to know his full name and social security number. They will do the rest. And don't be bashful. Some guys get so balled up that they don't get the opportunity to write and all Red Cross workers that handle these cases have had calls from relatives of soldiers who just want to hear from them. (My wife was a Red Cross worker in this field for years and handled many cases.) And don't worry about getting him in trouble either. I went in as a Private E1 but went to OCS and became a 2d LT and finally a captain. As a company commander I would occasionally have someone who lost touch with his family or just 'forgot' when they last wrote home. I'd have an NCO call them in, give them a telephone and let them call their people. Then I would have them write a letter and remind them to keep up the contact. The Army even then was concerned that its men stay in touch with their families. Now the Army is more friendly. It tends to keep the moral up. Let me thank him and you for his service and wish you both the best.

Answer 8

You can visit the recruiter station. They can help you out.

There is alot of support agencies that the army uses. You could speak with a Chaplain if they have one or you could ask to get into the Recuiting Battalions Family Support Group.

Start with the Recuiters, They should be able to do something for you.

Good luck and thank your husband for his service from me.
"Airborne"

Answer 9

Yes, send him non-pornographic pictures and write him telling about what's going on in your life. Of course tell him that you miss him and send your kisses and hugs, but whatever you do don't send him a "Dear John" letter.

Answer 10

You will be written. Drill Sergeants force recruits to write to alleviate this situation.

Check out the following US military veterans site