I am trying to gain a man's perspective on this. I am not looking for a relationship with a man, and he can have as little or as much contact with the child as he likes (no child support or money). My advice from family and friends has been to get pregnant and not inform the 'donor' that I am trying to fall pregnant. Just let him know after I do.
2006-10-18 15:16:48 · 18 answers · asked by bustedpink81 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I think you should choose the child's potential father very carefully and tell him beforehand that is what you want. Anything else seems a little underhand and selfish and doesn't show respect for the man.
I have a friend who did just this and she has two lovely kids by the same man. She had a great deal of respect for the guys she asked (I wasn't one of them) because she is a lovely, caring person - and that shows in her kids and the way she has raised them.
2006-10-18 15:21:14 · answer #1 · answered by Owlwings 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is wrong. If you want to have a baby that is fine, but you need to tell the person that is going to be the father. number one they may not want to be a father, but will feel they must be if they have a child...at least a good man would. Two they may want a child and fight you for custody.
Also, before you have a child with someone you may want to check their medical background and make sure you are not risking defects in their genes.
How would you feel if some guy you slept with just wanted to use you as an "oven" and poked holes in the condom to get you pregnant, and then told you that you can just give him the baby after you have it...he just wanted a kid. I would feel violated and used and so would any guy you did this to!
It is a moral issue he has the right to know what he is getting himself into.
2006-10-18 15:20:41 · answer #2 · answered by paganmom 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
That's is the most selfish uncaring thing you could do. Not for the man, but for your child. Why would you want to bring a child into the world with deception. What if the man isn't ready for father hood and rejects the child, what will you tell them then? OH momma tricked your daddy, so he wanted nothing to do with you? Why not wait until you find the man you want to spend the rest of your life with and bring a child into a stable home with 2 parents?
2006-10-18 15:27:35 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would go to a sperm back, the donors are kept confidential and and they do not know you. you can even pick eye color if they were talented in a specific think (like music etc) hair color race aned it is gaurenteed clean no germs or viruses unlike alot of sexual partners. I can only tell you this, I lost track of a woman I had sex with 20 years ago and I always wonder if she had a child. I do know that if she did i would want to know it. and be part of that childs life. Also when the child grows up, what do you say when he/she askes "who's my daddy"?
2006-10-18 15:39:38 · answer #4 · answered by ken z 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are able to constantly tell your mum the place you're and who you're with. it rather is terrific for secure practices. i do no longer rather understand what to make of your mum's remark the two. This rather does matter on how previous you're. i'm guessing you're 13 or 14 so i could clarify who this boy is, how intense high quality he's (he could be in case you;re going with him), what action picture you're seeing and the place and what you're doing in the previous and after. Your mum will see your adulthood and honesty as have confidence you to pass maximum possibly. sturdy luck and that i desire you have relaxing!
2016-10-02 10:55:50 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not believe you have the right to decide to use someone in this way. A father has rights to his child and the child has a right to know his father. I think it's immoral and unethical to use someone for their sperm for you to be gratified to become a mother. It would be like someone taking an egg from you and had a baby with it - how would you like it not to be told and not even be informed? A child has the right to know his father. Go to a sperm bank if you have to but don't use somebody to fill your need.
2006-10-18 15:23:40 · answer #6 · answered by MissHazel 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is totally sick and demented, and there should either be a law against it, or a precedent for suing you in a civil court.
And after screwing the guy in two ways, why are you so anxious to be a "single mom" (not by chance, but by choice), depriving the baby of a father? I really think you should see a psychiatrist, that is, if you can find one who isn't a liberal, if that's humanly possilbe.
I would call this whole thing selfishness to the extreme.
2006-10-18 15:19:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
It would be completely wrong for you to not tell the guy!
My personal input, every child needs a mother and a father!!!! So try to wait until you do find a guy you want to spend your life with and then think about kids!
2006-10-18 15:21:10 · answer #8 · answered by monroe1172002 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You are much too stupid to be a parent. It's not up to you to say "no child support". There are laws in place for these things. If a guy gets your pregnant, he will be legally obligated to pay child support. Grow up and educate yourself.
2013-12-22 22:47:44 · answer #9 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should you have more rights than a father? It takes two to make the baby and both of you should have equal rights with the child. Parenting is not a game.
You sound extremely selfish. Maybe you should reconsider having a child until you are emotionally ready.
2006-10-18 15:26:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋