I am going crazy, I am 25 now and I am going crazy , I did't have a stable job?

Question

(just got fired two weeks ago). I am just home going crazy trying to figure out what I should do with my life, while my parents are yelling at me the same way when I was 5, they are telling me " you are grown man,now you should have be married with kids already with a stable income just like your look at your older brothers already had been earning stable income when they were only 23 , why are you worse then them". I feel like a low life. I don't know why I am still thinking and not working. I am not sure if I should go to college although I never was good in school. In school only when I was trying hard I managed to pass my test but I was still averaging 75% in my classes. I was never able to be the best in anything except playing video games and cracking jokes. a lot was bothering me in high school like I couldn't pay attention to the teacher because there were too many sexy females in class, and that could still be a problem for me in college

Answer 1

Military is the way to go. Not only is it a stable income but also it will make you grow up some...and ofcourse they have nice looking ladies in it so GO FOR IT!

Answer 2

First of all, your parents are wrong for comparing you to your brothers. We're all unique with different abilities.

I'm wondering if the distraction issue is about more than girls. My son is wonderful at video games but has a hard time in school, although he's very bright. He has borderline ADD and a short-term memory problem. I think you may have a valid learning disability of some kind that is interfering and making you feel like less than you are. Be aware that the first thing people want to do if the word "disability" comes up is to prescribe meds because it's easier for them. Sometimes that is necessary. Sometimes, though, you only need to learn how things work for you. We can't all fit in the same box.

You're on the right track if you're so concerned about what you "should" be doing. It isn't your parents' opinions that matter, it's your opinion of yourself that matters, and I say this as a parent.

Remember first that there's nothing wrong with you ... a "disability" is really only a "difference" and most of the brightest and most prominent people on earth would be technically labelled with a disability.

Find something that works with your interest. Try a video/computer/game store. Maybe try taking one or two classes at a time at a junior college instead of going full force into it, and work part time in between. One step at a time... you'll get there.

Answer 3

I don't think you're going crazy. I think you're a little bit lazy, unmotivated, and well, basically those two things. Depressed maybe too.... I mean, you say you don't even try and had a job, and there are people who would do very well in one who go through hell in a handbasket just to get a minimum wage job they're overqualified for.... Sounds like this has been a pattern in your life if your parents keep bugging you. I don't think you should be married with kids at all though, if that consoles you any. You're too young agewise and emotionally. Sorry if I sound touchy and too personal, but today I'm just telling it like it is and right now you gotta figure out how to be less distracted by things and how to live your life productively.

Answer 4

hello sweetie. Thinking is sometimes better than working. And it does not mean anything if you were good or bad in school. College is not like school. I think you should not tell your parents about the details of your life. What's more important, don't complain to them. Make sure they know you are proud of what you do. Sometimes you get fired because you work as a clerk and the job who fits you is really CEO. Your parents sure want the best for you but sometimes they do not understand the direction of their kids and they get anxious. For these anxious people, the best is to avoid telling them about problems. Try to take time for yourself, make a deadline, say 3 months, and then you'll have to make a choice .

Answer 5

Your not that old. I don't think you should be married and having kids yet. But you should be seriously thinking about your future at this point. I have found that the hardest thing for me was deciding what I wanted to do. Once I decided the rest was easy. Yo have to think about what interests you and try to turn that into a career. You like video games? Maybe some kind of computer design program. You like cracking jokes? Well I can't think of anything for that but maybe you can! like I said, just decide on something and then just do it. If it means going to school, then do it. School is a lot easier to handle when you there for a purpose, like on a career track. And remember whatever you decide on, you can always change it if you don't like it. Nothing is set in stone. These days people change careers like they cange their underwear. Just get something under your belt and you can build on things from there. And don't be stupid about the girls distracting you. That was high school. Your a grown man now.

Answer 6

You didnt say whether or not you're still living in your parents home. They can only treat you like a five year old if you let them.
If you dont know what you want to do with your life at least get a job and support yourself until you figure it out. I didnt go back to college until I was 28. You dont have to be the best at what you choose, just do your best. At 23, if you're not in school you should be living in your own apartment and paying your own bills at the least....as long as you're doing that your parents have nothing to complain about!

Answer 7

You need to get a job while you are figuring out what to do with your life. My son went through almost exactly the same thing. He had very high SAT scores but he couldn't stand to be in school. He got a job at a large retail store and now manages it. He makes a very good income. You can do the same. Your parents aren't helping matters by comparing you to your brothers. Get a job and get out of the house. Make up your mind to grow up and take care of business.

Answer 8

You should get a job doing something you like, and one that reimburses you for college fees. Set your own goals, rather than allowing your parents to. Make it your goal to advance within the company.

Ask them WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO EARN THEIR RESPECT, the next time they belittle you and make negative comparisons. Ask them if they would be motivated by constant criticism from their boss.

If you have distraction issues in school, then take online courses. Those require that you are good with time management (especially if you work) and require that you on;y answer to yourself. This can be quite motivating, when you "take the wheel". Online courses are much much more challenging than spoon-fed ones where you meet for class, so don't let anyone else tell you any different.

When you are earning enough from your job, then move out and get your own place.

It sounds like you have anxiety issues (your difficulty with focus and school performance). Some confuse this with ADD but is often simply anxiety. Anxiety is not a weakness. The only weakness associated with anxiety, is procrastination or avoidance (slacking, video games).

You might at first feel overwhelmed with responsibility with a job and school, but with each accomplishment, you will begin to feel more confident. With each good score and grade, you will have better self-esteem, which will make you more resilliant to criticism.

Think about this: Think about how it would change you life to switch every "I can't" with "I am not willing to".

Think of problems and obstacles as opportunities in disguise. They are challenges to 1 learn something, 2-improve something, and 3- overcome something. Step up to the challenge.

College is such a small challenge in life, when you look at the big picture. It seems harder than it is now, because you are doing it someone else's way. You are living your life by someone else's rules, and your brothers have set the bar pretty high for the approval of your parents.

Face it. They will always do this, because they don't know any better ways to motivate you. Kids don't come with owner's manuals, and they only know what they were taught as children themselves.

This is why you need to seek your own validation, which will motivate you to produce better results. Online classes sometimes require group participation (posts, comments, questions, responses) and often are reviewed or rated by your peers (the other people nationwide that are in the same class). You won't be answering to an authority, but rather yourself, while getting feedback from your peers. Participation is usually graded, or earns you more points toward your grade.

There's virtually no way to cheat, either. Online courses usuallly have open-book tests, but with time limits and you only get to enter the exam once. You call the shots.

Get out of your comfort zone and step up to a few challenges. Go work at a fitness center or a tanning salon (you'll meet lots of girls) or a home improvement store (meet MILF's). Use your social skills of flattery and rapport building to earn the business of MILF's looking to remodel their kitchens, etc.

Keep your social life to weekends only, and don't hang with people who don't respect your time (when you're not working, and you need to do assignments).

Good luck with this, and I know that you have it in you to do well with whatever you want to do. Criticism is not very motivating, and is also self-serving. It is discouraging and it makes you say "why bother". PROVE THEM WRONG!!!!

You can't change your parents, but you can only inspire them to feel differently about you by changing your own behavior. It has to be thier idea. If they see you trying, then they will react differently. Especially if you''re too busy to listen to them because you have a test to take, or you have to work.

Answer 9

Don't panic. Lots of people are still looking around at your age. It seems to me you should find a job that would allow you to move away from home. Perhaps you can share with a roommate. Then work the job and take your time thinking about what you like and what you don't like.
You just need time. Take it.

Answer 10

grow up get out of the house with mom and dad and be all you can be.you are 25 years old get a life.Maybe your m/d wants you gone I would.You are not a low life just a boy in a mans body,playing games and joking needs to be over, if you went back to school who would pay for it.Go to school get a job do both prove that you are a man maybe you want let the females hinder your studys if you work ,and for once pay your own way.