My 7 year old daughter took it upon herself to "borrow" a quarter out of her stepdad's car console! I was very disappointed with her. She is a good girl besides that. Honor Roll three years straight, Citizens Certificates, helps around the house a great deal, and is very involved in church. What do you parents think is a fitting punishment?So far I have decided to take her TV and computer usage away. Thanks!
2006-10-18 12:03:01 · 28 answers · asked by Jm 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I think it is great that you see this as punishment worthy. This may be the lesson that will remind her for years to come why "borrowing without permission" isnt good. I know I had a lesson of my own when I was her age. Maybe you could have her write some ways that she could have earned the quarter instead of just taking it.
i.e. wash dishes, clean her room, etc. Good luck.
2006-10-18 12:09:36 · answer #1 · answered by Angela C 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm not sure why there is a punishment at all. Does she have a history of stealing? You describe her as a good girl that doesn't usually do wrong. So, why so harsh? She is 7. She took a quarter that was in an open area in a family vehicle. If you disapprove then explain that to her. Explain that just because the money is out in the open does not mean it is hers to take. Tell her that next time she takes money without asking that she'll have to be punished.
I really don't understand why she needs to be punished over this. Kids are growing and learning. I think it is highly possible that she had no idea this was wrong. From the way you describe her I am betting that she wouldn't have done it had she known it was wrong. So, simply explain that to her and let it go.
2006-10-19 01:14:29 · answer #2 · answered by Amelia 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
You haven't said if you have taught her not to take what isn't hers. There is considerable difference in the mind of a 7 year old as to what is not hers and what is just laying around. If she had never been told that the money in the car was not to be taken and treated as another persons property then your punishment is unjust. You need to sit down with your daughter and make sure that she has understood what you had thought she knew. If she did not understand then your assumption that she did was wrong and you need to appoligize to her not for the repraimand of taking the money but that you did not realize that the money belonged to someone else.
On the other hand, if she had a clear understanding that the money belonged to her father then the "punishment" really does not fit the crime. You should come up with a "work project" that will assign a monitary value to the money vs the work. Then explain that it took her father time at work to earn the money that she took so she understands the relationship between the "work project and the value of the money taken.
This was the method that my wife and I used with our six kids and they very quickly learned the value of work and money and how they went together.
They also learned to value what was anothers property from the same relationship.
2006-10-18 19:21:59 · answer #3 · answered by .*. 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
The Miser
A MISER sold all that he had and bought a lump of gold, which he buried in a hole in the ground by the side of an old wall and went to look at daily. One of his workmen observed his frequent visits to the spot and decided to watch his movements. He soon discovered the secret of the hidden treasure, and digging down, came to the lump of gold, and stole it. The Miser, on his next visit, found the hole empty and began to tear his hair and to make loud lamentations. A neighbor, seeing him overcome with grief and learning the cause, said, "Pray do not grieve so; but go and take a stone, and place it in the hole, and fancy that the gold is still lying there. It will do you quite the same service; for when the gold was there, you had it not, as you did not make the slightest use of it."
The Wolf, the Fox, and the Ape
A WOLF accused a Fox of theft, but the Fox entirely denied the charge. An Ape undertook to adjudge the matter between them. When each had fully stated his case the Ape announced this sentence: "I do not think you, Wolf, ever lost what you claim; and I do believe you, Fox, to have stolen what you so stoutly deny."
The dishonest, if they act honestly, get no credit.
The Thief and the Housedog
A THIEF came in the night to break into a house. He brought with him several slices of meat in order to pacify the Housedog, so that he would not alarm his master by barking. As the Thief threw him the pieces of meat, the Dog said, "If you think to stop my mouth, you will be greatly mistaken. This sudden kindness at your hands will only make me more watchful, lest under these unexpected favors to myself, you have some private ends to accomplish for your own benefit, and for my master's injury."
The Prophet
A WIZARD, sitting in the marketplace, was telling the fortunes of the passers-by when a person ran up in great haste, and announced to him that the doors of his house had been broken open and that all his goods were being stolen. He sighed heavily and hastened away as fast as he could run. A neighbor saw him running and said, "Oh! you fellow there! you say you can foretell the fortunes of others; how is it you did not foresee your own?'
2006-10-18 19:22:16 · answer #4 · answered by shlomogon 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would make her return the money and apologize to her stepdad. I would also explain to her how much trouble people can get into for stealing, even if it is a small amount or item. I think the punishment was fine but not for too long, she is only 7 and is still learning.
2006-10-18 19:12:07 · answer #5 · answered by Mrs E 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I actually think your punishment is excessive. At that age with a long drawn out thing like that the point of why they are being punished is lost. Mine would get a spanking. The point is made (which it needs to be), the air is cleared, and everyone can move on. It sounds like you have a great daughter so it will probably never happen again--but she does need to be punished.
2006-10-19 04:29:10 · answer #6 · answered by beckychr007 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think I would be finding out why she felt the need to take the money before I punished her at all. Does she get an allowance for helping around the house? Is someone at school bullying her and making her give them money? I would get to the bottom of it as it seems to be very out of character from how you described her. I think the tv and computer usage would be enough for this infraction.
2006-10-18 19:10:22 · answer #7 · answered by dragonrider707 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
A good lecture and taking away the TV/computer for 1-2 days should be enough for the theft of 25 cents. What did she really gain by taking 25 cents anyway? She couldn't even buy a candy bar with that.
2006-10-18 19:05:00 · answer #8 · answered by nido_tr3s 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
its only 25 cents, but teaching that stealing is wrong is good for her. i would make her write a "im sorry" note to her step dad and maybe talk to her about starting an allowance, get her to sweep and tidy up around the house for her allowance. teach her that in order to get money it has to be earned, not stolden from others.
i think the TV and computer are a good punishment. but she sounds like a good kid, i would punish her too much over 25 cents.
2006-10-18 19:11:33 · answer #9 · answered by xoxo_onecutegal_xoxo 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You choice sounds like a fair one to me. Obviously you wouldn't be upset with her if she wasn't already familiar with the rules as far as money goes. I think that the AMOUNT of money is irrelevant, it's the fact that she took something that didn't belong to her. Allowing her to take something not hers without any recriminations at all would only confuse her. You know your standards of dicipline best I would say that "borrowing" without asking is in line with lying in terms of setting a dicipline.
2006-10-19 03:02:43 · answer #10 · answered by Christina M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋