I am a 22yo male who's a college sr. I dont have a gf right now. However, in March I was diagnosed with Depressive Mood Disorder and an Anxiety disorder-I also was a cutter but NEVER harmful to anyone else. I take meds for both and do well. However, I don't know how long I should keep that to myself if I was dating someone. Would you be freaked out?(I have had the problems since I was 14 but nobody ever could figure it out and get me help-as far as my family) I am scared to tell too early bc she could get scared off and if I waited too long that she would feel hurt by having a secret kept from her. It is nothing major in my life really. I function just normally and everything. It is just that I take three little pills every morning and I have to stay on them so I can stay "normal" and healthy. I am not sure what to do.
2006-10-18 09:53:56 · 9 answers · asked by Trojan8408 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hi this happened to me. My ex boyfriend didn't tell me for awhile. We were dating for about 3 months before he told me he had a depressive disorder. I later found his prescriptions as well.. He was fine but i could tell when he would forget to take them. This had nothing to do with why he is my ex so don't be discouraged. He moved away for work so we split. I asked him why he waited to tell me and he said he wanted to make sure that we were going to be together for awhile.. Speaking from experience I would tell them but not on the first date. I would see how things go for little bit and when feelings start to develop i would let them know.. After dating you hopefully things will work out and you will feel comfortable enough to tell them. Don't keep it from them too long its not fair.
2006-10-18 10:05:31 · answer #1 · answered by Shy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely, this is one of those things someone deserves to know up front. If a girl decides to reject you because of it, that is her own issue and you should not take it personally. I have been diagnosed with chronic major depression and I have been on meds for a few years; I disclose this info fairly soon when getting to know someone that I might want to date. I know what you mean though about timing, it's not exactly first-date conversation, but definitely before getting 'involved'. Good luck :)
2006-10-18 17:28:48 · answer #2 · answered by zmj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,I to suffer from depression,and several other things that I take meds. for to stay "NORMAL" as you put it.We are normal,whatever that really means.We just came to realize that there were things in our lives that we couldn't deal with like others can.I admire you for being intelligent enough to get the help you needed.Allot of us turn to destructive behaviour.We hurt so much on the inside that we do things to ourselves so we can SEE the pain.I don't know why I'm telling you,I'm sure you already know all this.Maybe to let you know I completely understand your feelings and fears.I've been on meds since 1990,but it wasn't until last year I got professional help after I stopped drinking and,was properly diagnosed,put on the proper meds,and I feel like I've been given a new life.Instead of cutting,I turned to alcohol,and abusive men.My husband,is so completely understanding,in fact 1 1/2 yrs.ago his sister passed,and he was having a difficult time.The doctor put him on a low dose of Lexapro,and he thought he would take it for maybe 6mos.to a year.2mos,ago the doctor asked him if he wanted to start weaning himself off,and he said no.He feels much better on the med,and said he didn't realize that he had been sad.In this day and age with all the drugs that people take(illegal drugs) and the way that alcohol is so widely accepted,it's no wonder that adults are more and more depressed,addicted,or just in general,have so many mental disorders.More people need to realize that they have a problem and need to get help.
Anyway,sorry about getting off track there.I wouldn't worry about when you tell a girl or anyone else,about you being on meds.If it scares anyone away,they weren't for you anyway.You are living proof that help is available,and does work.You might even help someone else,thats afraid to ask for help,for fear of being called "CRAZY".I don't go around telling everyone on the street,but I'm certainly not ashamed to to tell my background to anyone.I wouldn't be worried to say to someone,I have diabetes and it's a diease.This too is a real diease,and you didn't ask for it.But you were smart enough to get help.I would hold my head up high,be proud of who you are,as I say,"warts and all"! If you're in the company of a girl that you think you could get serious about,just tell her,"there's something I want to tell you about myself,it's no big deal.But I really like you and want to share this with you".Like I said earlier,if this scares somone off,they weren't for you anyway.If you're a warm,caring(and you sound like you are)thoughtful guy that treats a girl with respect,that's all that should matter.Whatever happens though,if you strike out with someone and you think the reason is because of your condition,please DO NOT stop taking your meds.You sound smart enough to know something was wrong,and you reached out.I'm sure you like the feeling the way you are with the meds not to want to go off them. You just go on and have a wonderful life,and I pray all that's good comes your way.And that girl WILL come when the time is right. God bless
2006-10-18 17:59:03 · answer #3 · answered by LEJIANE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that admitting you have a problem and that you did something to resolve it is a wise move and should not turn a girl off if she finds out. Build trust first with whomever you date before telling them though. When the time is right for them to know you'll know it and be able to share that part of yourself freely without fearing rejection.
2006-10-18 17:10:59 · answer #4 · answered by hljones1169 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you think your going to have feelings for the person You don't need to disclose anything. I think once you have decided that someone is special enough to disclose all of your personal life then maybe you would want to let them know, I doubt anyone would judge for that especially if they really care about you and if they do have a problem w/ it then they are not worth your time!
2006-10-18 17:01:11 · answer #5 · answered by michele_zanella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were up front about it with me, I think I would be able to deal with it better. But if you tried to hide it from me and I had to find out because you forgot to get your prescription filled, then i would freak out.
2006-10-18 16:57:39 · answer #6 · answered by wilsonhutchison04 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her or them, which ever, because if they like you enough that wouldn't bother them. If you have to stay on them then it should be ok with them.
2006-10-18 16:57:46 · answer #7 · answered by Sweet Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wouldn't bother me. It's the world we live in..
2006-10-18 16:58:10 · answer #8 · answered by Mintygoodness1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well that don't bother me none i usted to cut also but quit along time ago so,no it don't freak me none
2006-10-18 16:58:40 · answer #9 · answered by ashley c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋