I have dated this girl exclusively for the past 4 months.*More on that below*.We went to the same high-school&she graduated the year after me.I am 30&she is only 8.5 months younger than me. We have almost everything in common.I've never met a better girl.*Before I started dating her, she said she had recently gotten out of a 1.5 year relationship with a guy that "cheated" on her (no details other than he kissed his ex when he was committed to her).She has commitment issues now and refuses to commit to me.Things were going extremely slow in the beginning, even her wanting to kiss me but holding back on the first 5+dates.Then she finally kissed me, things started going really fast&she said she was going to "have a talk" with her x-bf&that she wouldn't be able to hang out w/him anymore.Next thing I know, she refused to have "the talk"w/him&ended up having "the talk" w/me&I had done nothing in the mean time to f' things up.She hangs out w/ him even after i proposed.NowWe can't even b frnz
2006-10-18 09:20:40 · 15 answers · asked by snowfreeze3 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She'd rather "be friends" with a guy that treats her like crap than be friends with a guy that treats her like the princess that she is. She even has a 5 y/o and that's gonna be a prob because he is jacked up in the head pretty badly, but she seems to be attracted to that. Please help... :~
2006-10-18 09:21:56 · update #1
Unfortunately, that seems to be the way it goes. I met someone about 6 months ago. She was in a bad marriage and wanted out badly. We fell totally in love. Due to circumstances ($$$$) she had to continue to live with her husband (even though they had had 'the talk' and knew that things were thru) She told me that things were ok and that she told him until things were final and they were on their own that they were 'just roommates'. I was fine w/this until I found out that they were still sleeping in the same bed.
We knew that we were absolutely perfect for each other and what an amazing future we would have and had even talked of certain aspects of 'our' wedding......
Needless to say, all of that is gone now.
I wish you the very best !!!!!
ps- to all those who say 'move on', when you've been in our situation you'll realize how it just isn't THAT easy to do.......
2006-10-18 09:30:25 · answer #1 · answered by ben d 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is really too much you can do bro. Apparently when she went to have the talk with the ex, he said some stuff to get her back. Some girls just would rather have the bad guy then the good one.
If you really want her back, start dating and show her that you don't even miss her and then she will be trying to come back to you.
2006-10-18 09:25:39 · answer #2 · answered by b-rad 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's be clear: you were dating her exclusively, but she was playing both sides. Even though you might want to "rescue her" from her ex, she isn't likely to let you considering how much she follows him around like a puppy dog. She needs to know what a loser he is, but the only way that will happen is if she finds out for herself. You deserve better. Move on and find someone who appreciates you.
2006-10-18 09:27:03 · answer #3 · answered by francesfarmer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to hear that
I was in the same boat, my ex and i went out together for five months and eventually he dumped me to go back to his ex.
I would really consider moving on.
I know that you are in love with her and if she was in love with you there would be no question concerning her ex boyfriend.
Give her the space and time apart and if she truly loves you she will come and find you and hopefully you two will be happy and contented together but if not you know that it is not meant to be and hopefully you will meet someone else and be happy
good luck to you.
2006-10-18 09:31:46 · answer #4 · answered by blondegirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What type of help are you looking for?
She has made her decision so let her stand by it now. It seems like you're searching for drama. Get over it and move on. There are lots of women out there who wouldn't behave this way and would love to be treated like a priness.
2006-10-18 09:24:44 · answer #5 · answered by OohLaLa 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She seems hooked on the ex and unable to let go. If he is like a father to her child, she may want to give it another chance. Its unfortunate when a relationship is one-sided and even sadder when one goes back, for more of the same.
2006-10-18 09:30:13 · answer #6 · answered by yolkyolk 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell you this but you need to move on and find someone that's wants to be with you. You sound like a great guy that's have a lot to give a good woman.
Good Luck!!
2006-10-18 09:28:51 · answer #7 · answered by Debbie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that. Sounds like she was never over her ex. You'll just have to deal with it and move on. Sorry to say some women are like that. I hope you'll be all right, though. Good Luck!
2006-10-18 09:24:07 · answer #8 · answered by cutesquaw69 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Move on. Don't waste anymore time & energy on this chick. She's obviously still in love with the ex.
Sorry.
2006-10-18 09:25:03 · answer #9 · answered by Tonya L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not that she's picking the bad guy over the good guy. She's picking the one her heart still loves. Its not meant to be between you and her.
2006-10-18 09:28:39 · answer #10 · answered by JustMe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋