Why are my kids so out of control! I can't take it anymore, they are driving me nuts!?

Question

I have 3 children and I am 7and a half months pregnant. My 5 yr old girl goes to school from 8 til 2:30. When she gets home all hell breaks loose! My 4 yr old starts running and yelling, my 2 yr old takes her stuff and she gets all mad and starts whining and throwing fits b/c people are touching her stuff. She also throws fits about everything. She tries to punish my 2 and 4 yr old, I keep telling her I am the mom! I punish them by either giving them a spanking or sending them to their room. They just don't listen and it seems like no matter how much I discipline them they just keep on! there dad left, I think that might be causing some of the problems, but geez, enough is enough! I just can't take it!They argue with each other all the time. Why do they act so bad?

I tend to yell at them sometimes when I can't take it anymore. I don't want to it just comes out. I really don't think I should be getting this upset while I am pregnant.

for all you people that say spanking is not a good method. In the bible it says spare the rod and spoil the child. I go by the bible that is why I spank.

Answer 1

I would ask how you spank? Some parents think a spanking is a simple 1 or 2 swats on the covered bottom. Not here. We call that what it is, a swat. A spanking in our home consists of taking my girls to a privet area (there room) pulling down pants and putting them over our lap for a good dozen sharp spanks on the bottom. I know it sounds harsh but if you make a spanking a serious event and not just a reaction, you will find you do much less of them. I'd say keep up the spanking, but be more consistent with it.

Good Luck

Answer 2

It's the age. You shouldn't just give up or anything, but you probably aren't helping the situation much by being this upset. Do you have a trsuted friend or relative that could take the kids for some nice big block of time, like a week-end day or a whole night? Stash them with someone, pour yourself a bubble bath or something, and chill a bit. It's understandable that you would be frustrated, your kids are all at those ages, you are on your own, and you are pregnant. But... you gotta just keep on keeping on, honey, because that's what 5,2, and 4 year olds are like. Ask for help, stash them with someone trustworthy, and take a break when you need to. You will be calmer, and that will help them to cool it, too.

Answer 3

Out Of Control Kids

Answer 4

Some people say I am oversimplistic. But I strongly believe there is way too little spanking. And what spanking there is, is often done ineffectively.

Although I was spanked as a kid I was convinced in college that it was inappropriate. So I did not at first spank when I had my own kids. To make a long story short--in the course of being a Mom I changed my tune and decided my parents were not so dumb and old fashioned after all.

I know that anectodal stories are not very useful--but that is the major reason I spank--it works for me. I also think it is fairer and less mean than punishments like time outs and groundings. A spanking gets the punishment over and the air is cleared. The other things drag the thing out. I don't want to be a parental jailer. With younger kids I think the whole point of why they are being punsihed is lost. With older kids it is no more of an effective punishment and inspiration to strive for better behavior than jailing adults is.


I think if more parents would spank--and do it correctly--they would be very surprprised by the results they get. And I don't mean for every little thing but not just as a last resort either. The real key to making it work is consistency.

It does not seem to be working with your kids very well. the most important thing, as I said is consistency, you must spank each and every time--no matter how unpleasant it is--and I know it is. Second, a spanking should sting. I do not advocate hurting or beating children obviously--but the immediate goal of a spanking should be a very memorial sting. Given the age of your kids they should be getting it on their bare fannies. And with the two older ones I would spank with something like a paddle--a wooden spoon, back of a hairbrush, etc.

I should also mention all the research that has been done on this subject showing it is bad. These are all statistically flawed. Infact to the surprise of one researchers who surveyed all the research--he found it to be the most effective method of getting children to comply with the wishes of their parents. For more of discusion of this see what some of the research actually says at http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-GgIFACYzfqWx8YwvtspSWVmWzA--?cq=1&p=793

There is a reason parents have been spanking since time immemorial. The anti-spanking movement is very new. And like a lot of new untested ideas I am convinced it is wrong.

Answer 5

Hun, I am a mother of 3 -but I'm not pregnant - but I know how you feel. As soon as my 5 yr old and my 2 yr old are together, all hell breaks lose. It's as if a tornado came blowing through my apartment. If they get like that, try to get some help with them. It could be b.c they aren't getting enough one-on-one time with mommy so they are acting out to get your attention. If you feel like you are losing control, just put them in a room for a minute, go into the restroom and have yourself a good cry. Or try to settle them all down and read them a book.

Answer 6

Here some suggestion--with what I call the A, B, C's of parenting...

A) take a parenting class, it might help
B) Ask family to come on over to help or babysitter so you can get out because you could be overwhelmed
C) Do time out and never yell
D) spend time with each of them at different time so they feel special
E) Take a walk with the children to get exercise and relieve some stress
F) Pray a lot and thank god for all the blessings in your life
G) Don't spend too much time on the computer because they eat up time you don't have with 3 1/2 children.

Answer 7

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
Why are my kids so out of control! I can't take it anymore, they are driving me nuts!?
I have 3 children and I am 7and a half months pregnant. My 5 yr old girl goes to school from 8 til 2:30. When she gets home all hell breaks loose! My 4 yr old starts running and yelling, my 2 yr old takes her stuff and she gets all mad and starts whining and throwing fits b/c people are touching...

Answer 8

first of all, have you thought about starting birth control. Your kids are so young, and they need alot of your attention right now. They don't have the conceptual capabilities to think that you can't handle everything they do. It will just get worse once the baby arrives, since they will feel even more neglected.
First thing to do is create a time of day when you spend some alone time with each of your 3 children; even if you only can spend just 5 minutes with each by them selves, while you have quiet time for the others. This means no TV, No toys etc. Have them play with puzzles, drawing, or picture books, organise their toys in zip-lock bags, something productive they can do without making too much noise. Maybe even ask the 5 year old to read a book to one of the younger ones. If they break the quiet time rules, they loose tv, and desert, friend time etc.
after you have spend afew minutes with each one alone, make a family circle and have everyone tell somthing good about their day.
You need to give spanks for extremely bad behavior, but if its somthing like throwing a fit... sit them down for a discussion and tell them their behavior is unacceptable. Tell them the consiquences of their acctions( no tv, no toy play, no toys, quiet time reading book on bed etc) and for how long. Always enforce the restrictions so they know they will not ever get off easy.
Create charts for them
good behavior gets a star
bad behavior gets a red X
get this many stars and you get special privilages
get this many X's and you get these privilages taken away

do this weekly...hopefully this might give them a goal to be better, because all kids want to be good...they just need a way to keep tally. Heep the chart at their eye level so they can see how they are doing.

Also, you should take afew minutes each day, wether its in the morning, or after dinner...have them sit crossed legged in a circle, put their hands on their knees and do a meditation, play some relaxing music. do this with them, tell them to relax their bodies, close their eyes...they will feel their bodies starting to feel lighter, and make up a journey for them...kids have great imaginations and will imagine everything you say. Create an interesting adventure, such as taking a trip to a far away planet, or deep into a jungle, or to a secret under-world with amazing creatures. keep it short, but make it interesting. Once the adventure is over, tell them that you are all on your flight back home, and then you all open your eyes on the count of three. This will relax them, make them feel you are spending quality time togethewr.

Answer 9

It sounds like they're simply at "that age." Spanking is OK as long as it's not the final punishment. One thing to consider: give them projects with incentives. Like, you might have your daughter do some kind of project (like a drawing or a story) and when she's done, she gets a reward, maybe a treat or something. If you can engage their minds, that can often make a difference.
Also, be mindful of how much refined sugar they are getting in their food,as this can cause a lot of hyper-behavioral problems.
Best of luck to you!

Answer 10

First and foremost, when you feel like all hell is breaking loose.... COUNT TO TEN,,really,,it works,,,, that way you wont react of out anger......you have to maintain your sanity,, because if you and your children loose your sanity at the same time,,, that is no good. You are the adult,,,, show them that. Children learn hostility from somewhere, (sometimes.) Secondly,, you need a break,, if you have a family member that can help you out for a few every now and then so that you can have time to yourself,, that would be great. You need to have time for yourself so that you dont feel stuck in the same old routine every day. Call a good freind,,(dont leave your kids with just anyone) someone who you can trust.