Baby sleeping in separate room?

Question

Me and my wife had our first baby almost two years ago. At first the baby slept in a small basinet next to my wife's bed, this was more convenient for middle of the night nursings. At three months we tried to move the baby to a crib but she did not accept it and we ended up having the baby share the master bed with us.

We now decided to move the baby (toddler really now) to her own bed and own room, my wife will also wean the baby in the next few weeks.

If anyone went through this before I'd appreciate sharing your experiences. What difficulties might we face? any tricks to make it easy for the baby and the mother?

Thanks.

Answer 1

I don't believe in co-sleeping. It only causes problems like you're now facing.

First thing you need to do, is to stop referring to her as a baby. She's not a baby. She's 2 whole years old. She's not an infant--she can walk and talk and do all sorts of things. Put her in her toddler bed and if she gets up then put her back. If she gets up again, put her back in bed.

Answer 2

Does your baby have a favourite stuffed toy or blanket? Saving that toy for bedtime might make the transition more comforting for her.

Are you still using a baby monitor? If not you may want to "introduce" it to your toddler and show her that while she's sleeping mommy and daddy will always be listening. Use the monitor until she's a little older and can sleep well on her own.

Finally try soothing bedtime techniques to get your little one relaxed and sleepy. Bathe her, read her a story, sing to her, if you're religious say bedtime prayers....all those things will calm her down before bed and comfort her.

No matter what you are bound to have some rough nights at first. She'll scream and cry and throw little tantrums. She'll keep trying to get out of bed and come back into yours...it is defintiely going to be hard at first.

But stick to your guns. No matter what, don't let her back in your bed. One of you might have to lie with her until she falls alseep. You also may have to let her cry herself to sleep (I know it's heart-breaking). But for the sake of her independance and your marriage (you and your wife NEED to have your bed to yourselves again!) it must be done.

As for your wife, she's going to have a tough time too. Be as supportive and affectionate as possible right now. Hold her while you're sleeping in bed together so that she's comforted and doesn't feel like something's "missing".

Good luck!

Answer 3

Wow, you have gotten yourself into a really tough situation (of course, I'm sure you know that) Thankfully I learned with the first one that the sleeping thing is crucial when you move them to their own room...I always kept mine in a cradle next to my side of the bed for the same reason you suggested...ease in middle-of-the-night nursingand when they had outgrown the cradle or bassinet then it was into a crib in their own room. If she's 2 you should be able to communicate with her. Talk to her, tell her what's going on. Explain what you are doing and why you are doing it. Put her in her bed, tuck her in (I said prayers with them and at the end, in my own head, I prayed they'd stay in bed) If she gets up and comes to you...take her back to bed. You have to be consistent every single time. Don't give in because if you lose this little battle, believe me, you'll be losing bigger battles all the years she's growing up. It will be tough on you and your wife in the beginning, but this too will pass. It makes it easier if you can spend time during the day in her own room with her. Putting away toys, teach her make the bed, maybe if she colors something you can hang it on the wall in her room, play games with her in there...we also used to go in the room, get dressed for bed and then wrestle around on the floor until they were a little more tired out and then just put them in their beds. Whatever you do, do it consistently and make this work !!!! It may be hard the first couple of nights but give her a week and you will be amazed at what you have accomplished....all of you! Hope this helps !

Answer 4

When my son was born, he needed to sleep on my chest, but no matter what, I kept trying to get him to sleep in his cradle. For every nap and bedtime, I started him in the cradle. If he was really fussy, I would either co-sleep or put him in his car seat. When his nursery was finished, his first night in there, I slept on cushions on the floor so when he cried, I was right there to reassure him. He's 6 months old and has been staying in his own crib in his own room without sleeping with mommy for about 2 1/2 months now.

Other things that helped.....I started out with a cradle because babies prefer smaller spaces. I swaddled until he didn't like swaddling. I also raised the head of the crib so he could breathe better.

Answer 5

She should be sleeping through the night without feedings lonnng ago.

Put her in her bed everytime she gets out of it. EVERY TIME.

Its incredibly hard to undo the family bed routine once you've ingrained it in a child. You MUST MSUT MUST be consistant. She wakes up and comes into your room, you carry her back to her room and put her in her bed. She follows you out crying, you put her back in her bed and leave.

HOw ever many times she gets up, how ever many nights it takes. No questions asked.

There is NO OTHER WAY to do it. none.

She has to learn that she can safely fall asleep, stay asleep, and wake up in her own bed. The only way she can learn that is by doing it. You're not abandoning her, and she doesnt feel neglected, so DONT try to project your own concerns and insecurities on her by reacting as though what you're doing is wrong.

You're doing her a favor, trust me. I was 19 and had to sleep on the bedroom floor of my room mate's room until i got married. I grew up CONSTANTLY being allowed into myparents bed.

Iam 23, married, and pregnant, and i still have a hard time sleeping alone.

DONT DO THAT TO YOUR KID.

Answer 6

properly whenever you sense gentle rather. My son is 3 & a million/2 months previous and now sleeps in his very own room that's good next to ours. He transitioned there approximately 3 weeks in the past and it rather works out properly :) yet my husband is deploying in might and that i could carry the toddler decrease back in my room so I purely isn't lonely lol

Answer 7

i have a 9mos old with my fiance and am currently working on the same issue. iam perfectly fine with it and so is our son but its my fiance with the problem, its his first child (and a son). the way he works hes usually gone before the baby goes to sleep so i have no problem putting the baby in the other room but when he comes home he loves to get him up to play while he relaxes from work. when i wake up in the morning i find the baby in bed with us. we are trying to get my fiance different working hours and we are even trying to get my fiance to have his time with our son before he goes to work. i have another son froma previous relationship so that really helped with the baby. it was alot easier for the baby to wake up in the middle of the night to see his brother there and often went back to sleep after a changeing and a new bottle. to help distract your wife you could try getting her to use that time as her time or try to rekindle your love life since your baby has been in your bed for so long. good luck.

Answer 8

k im one of 10 so im used to this stuff.
wati till the baby is asleep then take her to her room and make sure u have a intercom type thing to hear wat is going on that should work. hope i was helpful