There has got to be another way.............?

Question

My little girl is 10 months now and still doesnt go to sleep on her own. I know I dont want to make her cry all night, I dont believe in doing that. Im not in a hurry to get her to sleep on her own and would like to transition her slowly. Id like her for to be falling asleep on her own around two. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I highly reccommend reading the book "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. I used a lot of the techniques she talked about and it worked out very well. I was very against the "cry it out" method with my 4 month old. I dont think its ever a good idea to let your child cry it out.

Answer 2

This is the thing. She either falls asleep on or with you, or she cries when she's put to bed on her own. You don't really have much of a choice here. She's not going to cry every night for the rest of her life if you put her down on her own, and letting her cry it out doesn't cause neediness later in life. She doesn't have to cry the entire night either- which she won't because she will eventually become tired and fall asleep. I know you think this is cruel, but it's really not. If she's not in pain, she's been fed, changed, etc. then she's fine. I used to be this way, too : ), and I felt so bad even thinking about it. But it had to be done.

-First, make sure she's going to bed/falling asleep about the same time every night. This is just so she gets used to sleeping at the same time every night. If this is already done, great! If not, let it sink in for about 2 weeks, doing what you've been doing.

-Put her down in her crib, tell her goodnight- do whatever your routine is- that will help wind her down and let her know what's going on. Turn off the light, sit in the rocking chair and let her cry for about 10 minutes or so. You can comfort her with your voice, your hands, but DO NOT pick her up. Repeat.

She's only crying because she's fighting change. She only knows what she's already used to. She's not crying because she's hurting, or hungry, or wet, or unloved. She's crying because this is not where or how she usually sleeps. It's going to take some time to get used to, and her crying is her way of telling you that this is not what's "supposed" to happen. When she gets on the bus for her first day of kindergarten, and she says she doesn't want to go and starts crying, you're not going to say "Oh you don't have to go if you don't want to." You're going to hold back your own tears, and tell her that she has to go. After a while, she'll come along- just like she will when she *learns* how to sleep on her own.

The reason why it's important to do it now, is because kids get smarter and smarter as they get older. It will be so much more diffucult to teach a two-year old to sleep on their own when they can get out of bed, open the door, and hop into your bed in the middle of the night. Or when they're already throwing tantrums.

Answer 3

I know she's 10 months old but please don't let that baby cry herself to sleep. How sad that would be. I would start by putting her in her crib & sitting next to it on the floor. Pat her & make sure she doesn't need anything. Sit there until she falls asleep. Each night move a little further away from the crib. If she cries pat her, don't speak to her, just pat her, stroke her head, etc. Eventually you'll be in the doorway. The next night you be outside the door, the next night close the door part way, on & on until the door is closed. It will be gradual & won't be easy but it does work. Just whatever you do don't let her cry it out, that is so unbelievabley cruel. I get from your question that you don't do that & wouldn't do that anyway. Good luck.

Answer 4

I know many people that don't believe in letting their babies cry it out when they are young and they now have 4 and 5 year olds that still have sleep issues - fighting it, coming out or their rooms numerous times and coming in their parents rooms in the middle of the night -every night. Get some sleep books, my favorite was "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". You won't regret it, because the longer you wait to deal with your child's sleep issues, the harder it will get. Letting her cry it out as prescribed in these books will make her a better sleeper and in turn she will be happier during the day, a better learner, and you will be an even better mom, getting the full nights sleep that you deserve.

Answer 5

A piece of advise that my pediatrician gave me was to let the baby cry for about 20 minutes, then check on her, rub her back, reassure her that she's ok, but do not pick her up. Leave the room again for 10 minutes, then repeat the reassurances all the time not picking her up. Keep doing this and within a few days, your daughter should be sleeping on her own. We had nothing but success with this.

Answer 6

Try this!!!! The first night let her cry for 5 mins. then go get her. Let her know you will be there for her. The second night let her cry 5 more mins. and go get her. Try this for 3 or 4 nights 5 more mins each time. If this doesn't work try and lay a shirt of yours or hubby's that you have worn recently in the crib with her. My son is 4 and half months and sleeps in his room by hisself no problems. Both methods worked for us. Good luck and God Bless

Answer 7

Falling asleep on her own around 2? No, she should have been falling asleep on her own for months now. Put her in her crib and close the door. Let her cry it out until she falls asleep. If she wakes up after that then walk in and softly "shhh" her back to sleep or sing to her or rub her back. Do anything you have to as long as you don't pick her up. Help her to fall asleep but don't help her too much.

Answer 8

When she falls asleep at a time off her schedule wake her and play with her and when you are ready for her to sleep she will be tired and should go to sleep fast. Don't over do it but you can get her on the schedule you want.Ease her into it and be consistent.

Answer 9

"Crying it out" is not a cruel or scarring experience for children. In fact, there are many situations in childhood where children need to learn to "self-soothe". The job of a parent is not to make sure that their children never cry... the job of a parent is to teach our children how to make it in the world sucessfully and happily as productive, responsible people.

Put your daughter in bed, kiss her goodnight, and close the door behind you. She'll be sleeping through the night within the week.

Answer 10

The only way to do it is to put her in her bed, close the door, and let her fall asleep. My daughter sings and talks till she gets tired. Try playing a radio or tape for her. Do not go in or she will keep screaming till you come in. Read her a book, put on the music and leave. Good luck. It will not take her long to figure it out.