I've Thrown Myself Away! My Low-Self Esteem and Lack of Confidence is making me suicidal!?

Question

During my high school years I had higher self esteem I could look people in the eye and hold meaningful conversations expressing my point of view.Ppl always complimented me on how attractive and intelligent I was.When I was younger i was told I held a conversation like an adult. Oh you should have seen me. I always had a professional appearance even at the age of 14-16!I used to be a socialite.
Now Im 19.I've gained about 60 pounds and it's messing with my self-image. When I'm talking to pple I notice I stutter alot now. I mix words together(sorta like aperson who had a mild stroke I Didn't have a stroke tho). I find myself placing my hands over my face/chin/neck/cheeks to hide facial hair caused by Polycystic Ovaries. I always pulling my shirt upwards by the collar cuz of chest hair.I feel worthless. Id rather stay out of public cuz I feel so unattractive. PEOPLE SEE ME AND SAY THAT I HAVE THROWN MYSELF AWAY! and it's true!I dont wanna be this way anymore but theres nothing I can do!

Answer 1

YOU'RE ONLY 19! You have not thrown yourself away. Lose some weight. It is better for your health and it will only get harder as you grow older. You should see a endocrinologist about the facial hair. These things will work wonders for your self esteem. Hang in there girl. We're with you.

Answer 2

If you can't do it, no one can do it for you. All the things you are talking about are superficial. Can you still think? Can you still use your body in positive ways? The only worthless thing that I read about is your attitude. You are alive. There are people out there who have much worse things going on than you. I know, there are people starving in Africa too. But it is true. Go visit a hospital, see the people there. Go visit a nursing home, see the poor people who have outlived their bodies. Then, look around you, find something that interests you. Make a goal of 10 lb. weight loss and make it realistic, say 3 months. Then, truly work for that goal. Ask about medications or remedies for the facial and body hair. Hold your head up, no matter what. You are what God made you and that cannot be wrong. The facial and body hair and weight are symptoms of a problem that can be fixed. The anxiety in public and the stuttering can be dealt with in counselling or prayer. Which ever way you choose to deal with it. Frankly, I use both. I believe that we are here for a purpose, and maybe yours is to get through this bad time so you can help others through theirs. Don't give up on yourself.

Answer 3

The best thing you can do is remember that no matter what you look like, no matter how you sound, you are an amazing person. You are a smart, well-spoken person. You have to remind yourself that you mean something to someone-whether it's your best friend, your mom or your dog, you are something to someone. Even if you're nothing to yourself. Remember that you don't have to impress anyone but yourself, so go get a manicure, or buy yourself that new pair of jeans. It's okay to spoil yourself sometimes, and sometimes that's just what you NEED to do. That transition between high school and "life" is hard, especially when you're sick- I have cervical cancer and I was diagnosed my first year in college. It's hard, you feel really bad about yourself. Just remember that you are worth the extra mile, and go for it. You will be okay!

Answer 4

are you in school? if so there are councelors on campus. if not, i'm sure we all agree to please tell a counselor and get help! if $ is a problem call the toll-free crisis counseling # for your area. you are brave to step up and ask for help on the internet! now take it a step foward and bring it to someone who can hear your voice! remember today does not have to be tomorrow. by the way there is no such thing as "throwing yourself away". you are a human being; as we all are, and what's important is that you work with what you got. everybody goes through changes up and down. you are down, so let's start the road upward! good luck! take care of yourself by getting help. you can't do this on your own, it's obvious that it's eating you up!

Answer 5

First of all you are not worthless. If you accept yourself, others will accept you too. You have to feel good about yourself first. Try doing things that you enjoy, pamper yourself, and get some self esteem girl! You are a gift from God and have so much of yourself to give. Don't sell yourself short.

Answer 6

Only you can decide how to look at yourself, People are arrogent and only see what's on the outside because that is what the eyes are made for. If you believe you have thrown yourself away then fix it! Noone else can help you if you can't help yourself.

Answer 7

God, that sucks. I am so sorry. Polycystic ovary disease does cause weigh gain and the extra hair. I hope you are seeing a good endocrinologist? Here are some options:http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000369.htm

Talk to your doctor about a diet for you that reduces your insulin levels.

Good luck.

Answer 8

had the same problem, and man that was the worst time of my life. i swear a lot to people and usually i don't but just have faith and DON'T KILL YOURSELF over this! try talking to someone about it - I think someone upstairs always ready to listen!

Answer 9

dont worry, you probably ramble on alot and no one listens to you at all. gain more weight and you can be the bearded lady at the circus. There you'll make plenty of freaks. I mean friends.

Answer 10

i think thet this site is wery helpfull http://www.theaones.com/hypnosis.htm