Will mental illnesses like personality disorders+depression sort themselves out eventually,or is help needed?

Question

I feel suicidal and used to feel blue quite a lot. I have a horrible personality and find it hard not to fall out with people. I change from needed everyone to wanting to be a loner. I feel hated by those around me and like an outcast. I always do things wrong and have a strong sense of guilt. I did go to a psychiatrist once, but felt very bad one day like there was no point to anything including the appointment, so didn't go, and due to communication difficulties I couldn't write a letter or phone to explain why I hadn't been to the appointment. This happened a year ago. I feel really bad about missing it without telling him, as I hate being abandoned myself so me not turning up was kinda horrible. To get another appointment I would have had to contact him, so as you can tell, that was the end of it. I didn't really find useful the few meetings we had useful. I don't really go to the docs for physical problems, I let them sort themselves out, will this just sort itself out?

I was okay during the summer months when I was on the otherside of the world, maybe this was because I felt very carefree and was able to let myself go. That made me think that it could go away by itself, but then again, when am I ever going to be able to spent as much money and time on these I want to do for 6 weeks pretty much non-stop. I did feel down a few times when there was tension with people and various other incidents, but it didn't last as long as it previously had.

Also I was just wondering if its outside factors which create chemicals which trigger depression, which then need to be zapped or altered so that depression is no longer there, and then we need to figure out how to stop those chemicals being produced everytime we are affected by the outside world? Or... what? Can someone explain that sort of side to it please?

The personality disorder came from me looking at a website which described Borderline Personality Disorder very much like me.

http://psychcentral.com/personality/

Do you think he'll mind if I'm apologising a year after it happened?

I haven't really noticed that I'm feeling much in this last day - I still sometimes have noticed that other people are talking without including me, and that makes me lonely, but is this just a lack of feeling, or a lack of depression? I'm confused!

Answer 1

To be honest, I think it is quite unlikely to just 'sort itself out'. Visiting the doctor, taking medication or trying one of the various 'talking therapies' might not be the solution for you, but you do need to make positive steps.
Have you been diagnosed with a personality disorder? You say you have a horrible personality, but it is very likely that you are a nice person - the low self esteem, feeling worthless and hating yourself is common with depression.
I've suffered from depression for about 7 years, but I'm not having treatment at the moment - I'm trying to solve it myself. It isn't the easy route, but it might be worth considering. I'm trying to make positive changes to improve my mood, and I'm also working on improving my self-esteem. I struggle to maintain relationships, and I'm trying to work on that - I want to be a better person.
If you decide not to go back in to treatment, I'd recommend that you plan each day. Right down what you need to acheive, getting washing, getting dressed, leaving the house. Try and eat heathily, don't drink, don't take drugs. Regular exercise really helps me, and I think it helps a lot of people.
I can understand how you feel, but if you wnt to go back to the psychatirst, you should get in touch. I'm sure he will understand as alot of people that suffer from depression do things like that - I was in 3 therapies, and just stopped going a few months ago.
If you want to talk to someone who's been through something similar, get in touch.

Answer 2

It's unlikely to 'sort itself out'; you need to have help for the conditions you mention, specifically the depression and the feelings of low self-esteem, guilt etc.

Personality disorder??? Is this your diagnosis or has it come from a professional?

It would be a good idea to write a note to the psychiatrist explaining why you didn't attend however, you wouldn't be the first. It could be useful for you to see a psychologist rather than a psychiatrist (although one could refer you to the other as necessary).

It sounds as though you are very capable of communicating your feelings and are brave to be so forthright to a group of people you don't know. It would be useful for you to find out why all this has happened to you and why you feel the way you do. It may be something fairly obvious which perhaps hasn't occurred to you, or possibly something at an unconscious level.
Whatever - it needs sorting out and you need help so you can recover and start enjoying life again.
You may need a prescription to help you over this bad patch but a talking therapy is definitely the best way to help you to make positive changes.
Good luck ~RJS

Answer 3

I hate to say it but I do think that you need some help. I'm like you and I want everything to work out on it's own but unfortunately it's usually not possible. It sounds like you have problems with anxiety and depression so it would be best to get help. I doubt your doctor will even remember that you didn't show up for your last appointment and if you feel that uncomfortable with it then maybe you should just find another doctor to go to. I haven't been to the doctor (psychiatrist) in years but I lost my daughter in July and have been going crazy ever since then. It has gotten extremely bad the past couple months and I recently decided that I NEED to see a counselor about it. I have yet to make the appointment yet but I now know that I do need help and I am going to call to get it.
Good Luck!!

Answer 4

Sounds familiar. I've struggled with depression before and I am sorry. It really can be very frusterating and confusing.

In my case, I was going through some stressful times and I had grown up in a very stressful and hostile environment. And ended up resorting to numerous (failed, obviously) suicide attempts.

I am much, much better now. I tried all of the possible remedies, and I'll let you know which ones helped the most. I went to a family doctor who offered both prescription remedies, as well as natural ones. At first we tried various prescription medications, but I was very dissappointed with the side effects (like insomnia or a decreased libido). However, those were just the side effects they had on me, that doesn't mean you'll react that way. For me, excercise (even just taking a daily walk), a healthier diet and generally a healthier lifestyle, more reading etc gave me strength to start pulling through. I also found volunteering to help others the most successful way to pull myself out of depression. It was really hard to motivate myself to take the first step, but the more I kept busy, the better I was. Now I am happily married and have a beautiful daughter, who keeps me very busy. Life has never been better.

In short, in my case, things did sort themselves out, but I had to keep myself occupied in the mean time -- mostly to keep me from dwelling on my problems. I hope things get better for you. Don't feel like you have to be a hero, get help and talk to people (not psycaiatrist, they tend to make you dwell on your problems, which can be counter-productive) and councillors. Good luck!

Answer 5

I wish I could lie to you and tell you that this will all just work itself out. But that would be a HUGE lie. What you are experiencing are major bouts of depression. It is probably caused by a chemical imbalance in your brain and not anything you have done. If more people would realize that they wouldn't feel so bad about themselves and be so impossibly hard on themselves. You just need help...and that's ok. We all need help sometimes. Please don't ignore all that you are feeling and just hope that it will go away. Get to a doctor right away. They can help you and you can get your life back. You are worth it whether you think so right now or not. God didn't make any junk and that goes for everyone and everything. You owe it to yourself to get the help you deserve and desperately need. Good luck and God Bless!!!!

Answer 6

In my experience, no. You've got a lot of symptoms going on without treatment and in order to "let this sort itself out", you need to face the bottom-line cause of your feelings. All of the symptoms and BS going on in your life will prevent you from looking deep enough to find the cause of your feelings and, believe me, it's there and waiting to come out. With the help of a qualified therapist and possibly medication to manage your symptoms, you can have a more normal life. But just like an alcoholic, you need admit you have a problem and then you need to find help for your problem. Without that, you will continue to feel the way you do and you won't make an progress towards a better life. And, you can get better if you work hard enough!

Answer 7

Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..

But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.

Helping you eliminate depression?

Answer 8

No, it will not sort itself out. i think you know that well and that is the beginning of a positive move. try and get books that educate you on how u feel. it happens to most people at least once in their life time. personally i felt the same some few years back. what i did which am still doing is to understand myself all the time. i try to love myself in a healthy way. take good care of myself. Another thing that helped was faith in God. I hope this doesn't sound superficial. faith helped me to realized that i was loved by God no matter what i did and still do. faith helped rebuild my selfworth. Get good motivational books to read. they help alot. try and change the way u look at things. that also helps. Remember: life is soo beautiful. try and enjoy it.

Answer 9

It has to be said that they often don't sort themselves out. With most people, a combination of medication and councelling seems to be the best shot. It really depends on the severity of your condition and what, exactly, it is. Your GP should be the best person to diagnose and begin treatment although they're not always helpfull with problems such as this. If yours is no good, you have the right to change. Good luck

Answer 10

Well what happens with problems like depression is that if you don´t care of them in the right way they turn into a cronic state so I recommend you go to a therapist, one you feel confoetable with and sort out you problems. Besides for depression sometimes you need prescribed medication and therapy so good luck.