my boyfriend of 7 years is an alcoholic. he has recently cut down on his drinking. he has lied to me SEVERAL times and i dont know if he can be trusted. hes lied about the smallest things to saying hes not had a beer, when infact, he had. A.A. is out of the question. he refuses to attend. should i just cut my loses or hang in there?
2006-10-18 03:47:29 · 10 answers · asked by leslie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
7 years and you haven't gotten married yet? Hummm this should tell you right there that he is not looking for a commitment. Alchol is an addiction that is very hard to kick. I would let him know that if he has no plans of going to AA or cutting it out completely then you are going to leave. Keep to your word. Let him know he needs to stay off the alcohol. Some guys will quit for a few months and then they are back at it again. I would not tolerate this. You should think better of yourself than to be with someone that drinks like this. Does he treat you bad during these times? I think once he tells a few lies then it opens the door up to more lying. I wouldn't be able to trust someone like this. I personally would want a better life for myself. This isn't a helathy realtionship. Get out if he doesn't want to quit.
2006-10-18 03:55:01 · answer #1 · answered by hehmommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you really love him? If you do and you decide to hang in there it will not be easy. You really can't trust an alcoholic when he is drinking. It is a disease, but you just have to ask yourself if the relationship is worth it? Does he put you (or if you have any kids) in danger? Is he working or unemployed. Why is AA out of the question? You may have to give him an ultimatum either go to rehab or lose you. You just have to be ready if he chooses the alcohol over you. If you do stay with him you should go to Al-Anon. It's like AA but for families of alcoholics. Good luck.
2006-10-18 04:01:36 · answer #2 · answered by kat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seven years is a very long time. He knows exactly what to tell you and that you will always be there to believe his stories. Get out while the getting is good. If he has lied SEVERAL times, then you probably don't even know the true man.Lying is a habit, just like his drinking.If he doesn't care to get help for his drinking it's because he doesn't want help.Don't be his crutch and you'll see he can't stand on his own.......Good luck
2006-10-18 05:31:27 · answer #3 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he is lying to you should be your answer here. If he lies about little things how can he be trusted to handle bigger things? Trust is a hard thing to maintain in the best of situations so I would cut my losses and look for someone who is gonna respect me enough to tell the truth.
2006-10-18 04:06:32 · answer #4 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him, hang in there. Otherwise, don't put yourself through the pain. And I wouldn't make him choose, beer or me. Because if he is an alchoholic, that won't work.
2006-10-18 03:53:32 · answer #5 · answered by Fran Y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to an AL ANON anon meeting for your self. they will help you sort out what you should do. Al anon is in the phone book if not phone AA, and they will find an Al anon meeting for you, This will help YOU
2006-10-18 03:57:34 · answer #6 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him.
Not because he is an alcoholic, but because he lies to you and won't attend AA.
If he loves you, he would do something right.
Dave
2006-10-18 03:54:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You owed him 10 dollars? how could you? That's horrible.
2016-05-21 23:29:15 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut your losses! It's not worth it to try and help if he is not willing to change. It will only get worse.
2006-10-18 03:55:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
never belive , and he never back his normal life
2006-10-18 04:04:38 · answer #10 · answered by Shameem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋