I broke up wit my bf durin d summer, but now we are back in college he keps tellin me he loves me and now i have even heard strangers talking bout it! I know i will never ever get back with him and i have made that very clear, but he still doesnt seem to get the message! how can i convince him to get over me??? i feel so guilty at the moment and hate the way people think im a ***** just because i dont like him! help me!!
2006-10-17 23:14:48 · 20 answers · asked by helpme2000 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell him that he deserves someone who will love him and that it isn't you, you can't give him what he deserves.
Also tell him that he can't give you what you want, and let him know that if you stayed together you would end up hating him and as a result he could hate you and you would never want that.
Get him to remember the good times that he had with you and let him know that those won't happen again with you but he could have good times with somebody else.
Let him know what you like about him and stress heavily that OTHER girls will also like these qualities.
What he needs is to be complete with you so he no longer thinks of you but he looks forward to something new with somebody else.
In other words give him hope but make it clear that you two are heading in different directions.
Try not to make him jealous, there is no need to hurt him any more and you don't want to feel any more guilt.
2006-10-17 23:27:44 · answer #1 · answered by lifeontrack2006 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't your problem, its his. Im afraid that he'll only get over you in time or when he meets someone new. Nothing you can do or say to him will convince him that your not the one for him becasuse thats what he has in his head. Maybe just sit him down and explain how you are feeling about the whole situation.
Tell him that you are really sorry that things have gotten the way that they have between you but it'd be unfair on both of you to be together when you aren't in love with him anymore. Compliment him and say that he's an amazing guy and there is someone out there for him, its just not you.
2006-10-17 23:22:36 · answer #2 · answered by vickicraig86@btinternet.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You couldn't make it clearer! some of the civilise answers given are the best course. i.e. changing your mobile/cell number. Or kindly speaking with him. But it's true, you can't make somebody fall out of love with you! in fact it's quite flattering that you have somebody who's into you. But at the same time, you want it within sanity boundaries ...which will not spill into emotional conflict of any sort. What is your respected age and his? Has he had a lot of fail relationships in the past. Is he insecure and sometime possessive. Was he bullied or trouble in some sort of way, he may have disclose to you, in the time you was with him? It all stems from somewhere? It could be well the fact that he hasn't had somebody given him that affection he longs for in his life...so therefore he envisions you ...as you treated him good etc?
2006-10-18 01:58:11 · answer #3 · answered by darkdealx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have my sympathy, my ex is still bombarding me with texts 16 months after we split & he is 37!! I have tried to stay friends as we are both 'adults' but he just keeps asking the same questions over & over, I get the feeling that he won't stop unless he gets the answers he wants to hear which just isn't going to happen, I have well and truly moved on, I have a new man and we are very happy, I just wish he could do the same.
2006-10-17 23:43:59 · answer #4 · answered by shortstuff 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Standing up in a crowded space and say something like this....
I have an Announcement to make.
''I had a relationship with '_____________' and now I no longer feel the same as I did. He knows this and yet is trying to make life difficult for me through the spread of gossip that comes back to me.''
''I've tried being straight, and kind, but now it seems I just need to be straight, with everyone who seems concerned about how I have been treating him. Sorry, but it's over.''
Of course, you use your own words and find your own space / place to make this announcement, because it seems as if you need to simply get 'your message across' - to all.
Good luck.
Sash.
2006-10-18 00:15:43 · answer #5 · answered by sashtou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can´t make someone fall out of love with you just like that.
The best you can hope for is that you find someone else and he accepts that, then perhaps he can move on as well.
Just cos he lets people know he still loves you doesn´t mean that he really does, it´s like he´s trying to plant the seeds of doubt in your head.
Stop feeling guilty, It´s your life and your heart !!!!!!
2006-10-17 23:21:16 · answer #6 · answered by Peter R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't you feel guilty, you have done nothing wrong. The relationship was over, you finished it, that is your absolute right. He can't get over you because you are so fab!! You are not a b***h. He will move on, and grow up eventually, just feel sorry for him, he has lost someone as wonderful as you!!!
2006-10-17 23:19:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Forget what other people think. Just tell him it won't happen if he still doesn't get the message ignore him and he will eventually get the message unless he is a stalker then you will have to get a restraining order.
2006-10-18 05:09:28 · answer #8 · answered by John T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him in the nuts.....
On a more serious note...it sounds like you should completely ignore him. Just by talking to him it sounds like he thinks there is a hope you're still interested.
If he still persists in trying to talk then tell him you will complain to your teachers of harrassment if he carries on. That's basically what he's trying to do...
2006-10-18 00:49:46 · answer #9 · answered by Edward R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice would be to jus deal with it for now and totally ignore him, if u speak to him even in a friendly way he may take it the wrong way. he will soon get the message, even if it does take a while! try to take it as a compliment even though it's annoying! good luck!
2006-10-17 23:40:35 · answer #10 · answered by Jess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋