I was raped from the time I was 9 and it lasted for 5 years. My own blood brother did it. How can I get over this and live a normal life?
2006-10-17 18:23:26 · 37 answers · asked by Perfectly Insane 5 in Health ➔ Mental Health
unfourtantly my dear you can't. no matter how hard you try you will never forget it. when i was in college in 98 i was rapped by five guys. sure they went to jail for a short period of time, but they took somehing from me that i was never able to get back. my advise is to seek help. having a professional to talk to will not only help you with the process of trying to move on but it will also give you the confiedece so you can start to live a normal life.
2006-10-17 18:27:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for whats happened to you and I hope you know that you will go in life. The only real advice I can say is that maybe you shouldn't try and forget what happened to you. I know that might sound pointless but it's not. Use your past as a way to grow and become stronger. Help others by sharing your story with people who have had your same experiences. I to know what it is like to feel rock bottom. I am just now starting to get my life back. When I was suffering I though that no one has a worse life than me, but now i see that even though some things in our lives might seem bad, there are others who have felt the same and your not alone. I don't know your whole story but I'm sure you could find a support group somewhere. or even a counselor. IF those don't help than get support from someone who is close to you. I hope that I could be of help and just remember that the sun will rise. It is going to take time to feel better, but eventually that time will come.
-Lots of love, and best wishes!!
2006-10-17 18:36:08 · answer #2 · answered by cougarbrooke08 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ryan,
This is a very serious issue, and you haven't said how old you are. I assume you're not still being abused. I am very sorry for what you have gone through, and would suggest you seek counseling. There are very good counselors that can help you to deal with the hurt and issues that will obviously affect your life from what has happened to you. If you are in school, you can get help through the counseling center there, or through a local church. Most places such as these don't charge a fee, and are more than willing to help. If you don't have access to any place like this, you can even look in your local phone book for places such as abuse hot-lines and such where they can lead you in the right direction for help. I think the hardest step is probably stepping out and admitting you need help. Once you've started counseling, I think you'll realize you've got a long journey, but it's totally worth working through. God be with you and bless you!
2006-10-17 18:32:36 · answer #3 · answered by holyhiphopper 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all I want to tell you how sorry I am for all of the pain you have been experiencing. I also want you to know that it wasn't your fault and that you did nothing wrong to deserve such abusive behavior. I pray that that brother is no longer in your life or has any contact with you. I am a RN who is a Psychiatric Nurse Educator and want you to know that help is available for you and that you need professional help to get over this and to be able to experience a normal sexual relationship. You do not say whether you told your parents about this sexual abuse and what their response was. This is an aspect of your abuse that also needs to be dealt with because it will affect all future contact you have with them. I do not know your present age and if you are still a minor or not. At any rate I would suggest that you first turn to your family physician and ask for a referal for counseling. If finances are a problem you might start with Call Rape for counseling help or there are also Mental Health Services that have a sliding scale for charges. Also a Pastor at your church might be able to give you some support. Unfortunately there is no easy answer to help with the pain but the important thing is to always remember that you are a unique and loved child of God and God will provide you with people along your path of life that will guide you, support you and love you. Don't try to change things all on your own but do reach out to others to help you. I wish I could give you a big hug and let you know that what happened to you was totally unfair. I also want to congratulate you for taking this giant step of reaching out to others on this web site and sharing with them your deepest pain of being raped for five years by your own brother. I acknowledge your personal courage in reaching out in your pain and believe that your determination and loving spirit will lead you to the peace in your life that you so deserve. May God bless you and heal you of all your emotional pain.
2006-10-17 19:10:56 · answer #4 · answered by marnie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe me, I know what youre going through b/c my family suffered a similar situation but it involved about 6 girls in my family and was left unsaid for years. First of all, this is something you will never forget, and something you will have to deal with for the rest of your life. The good news is that you have the choice as to how this will affect you. Either you can let it eat at you, depress you, give you trust issues, or whatever, or you can get some help with the situation which from experience I highly highly highly recommed!!! I dont know the situation but if you feel its necessary, you should confront him, put him in jail, etc, basically do what you need to do to make the situation have some sort of an ending or closure. If you dont, you might struggle with knowing you could have done something now, but failed to. Good luck and God Bless!
2006-10-17 18:29:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your not going to forget it.
This is trauma.
Also tragic.
You probably need to speak to an pyschologist and get on some anti-depressants.
Tragic this happened to you. You have a new life in front of you to make of it as you will.
You can can dwell on the unfairness of it all and the emotional scars or you can try to move FORWARD and make everyday a triumph of a new step, a new day. Life is truly truly too short to harbor all of this.
I wish you the best and a beautiful world today, tomorrow from here out.
2006-10-17 21:31:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife went through this, too, and still has setbacks from her experiences. Her older brother was a step-brother. She says you can't ever really get over it, that you just have to come to terms with what happened and learn to live with it. The toughest parts are making yourself realize that it wasn't your fault and having a relationship with a man afterward. Some women never can. My wife is great, but it really hindered the romance for a while because of her memories.
Bless you, and good luck.
2006-10-17 19:04:55 · answer #7 · answered by Charles H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You won't ever forget it but you can do something to prevent it from destroying your life. When you can put it on the back burner and leave it there untouched, you will find much relief.. but, there are triggers embedded within the mind which allow the emotional turmoil to bubble up to the surface.. the urgent need is to get rid of those triggers. They are not eliminated by conscious efforts.. has to be a bit deeper than that.
2006-10-17 18:59:07 · answer #8 · answered by mrcricket1932 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You will need a support system to get you through this. See a counselor, social worker or psychologist for help. If there is a victim assistance center in the city then give them a call. This is a good place to start. Even a visit to planned parenthood to talk to a lady there would give you some relief. Best of luck to you!
2006-10-17 18:29:26 · answer #9 · answered by whrldpz 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't have a right answer for you, but I can give you my opinion. First off, forgetting something as life changing as this won't fix the problem, nor can it make it go away. Have you considered talking to a pyschologist or just a freind who can listen. Have you sat down with your brother and discussed how you feel about this? I know that may seem extremely complicated, but it helps. You might find it hard to be in a relationship, but just be aware that all men are not like your brother. Feel free to message me sometime if you like. I'll be more than happy to talk to you if you're comfortable talking to a pychologist. Sometimes its better just to talk to a complete stranger about things such as this
2006-10-17 18:28:55 · answer #10 · answered by pregowith1stbabyboy 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋