My husband and I disagree how to handle our 9 yr old ADHD daughter. She needs therapy. My husband doesn't like doctors and thinks we can counsel her better than any therapist. I'm going out of my mind with her! She's been to 2 psychiatrists and we've tried Strattera, Adderall, and Concerta and all had no effect on her. She's constantly in trouble in school. She's very provocative for her age and I'm afraid she's going to be pregnant the moment she hits puberty. I've excepted we need to deal with this, but how can I convince my husband we need outside help!?
2006-10-17 17:52:34 · 8 answers · asked by chadiego70 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
We've given up on the medication part, but she needs a therapist to TALK to. She's an emotional wreck and I'm afraid suicide may be something she'll consider one day.
2006-10-17 18:03:30 · update #1
Contact the Drake Institute. They don't use drugs-they strengthen the brain so that it can control itself- focus, make better decisions, etc. You and your husband are very important as your child's support, guidance, and re-emphasis of proper behavior.
It's not just counciling your daughter needs. There is actually a part of her brain that is weaker. With the Drake Institute, she will learn how to strengthen that portion of her mind and will control her own behavior- with guidance from you both, of course.
2006-10-25 15:39:54 · answer #1 · answered by Insufferable Know-It-All 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok take a breath. She needs to see a PYSCHOLOGIST for skill building and coping.
First things first: Get her in a routine. A STRICT routine. be very firm about limits. ADHD kids need structure structure structure. They work well with simple lists.
School work: make a folder with this on the front:
Go to locker
get books for homework
pack in bag.
Bring home.
The inside of the folder: One side says "DO" one side says "DONE".
At home, everything needs a place and everything belongs in its place. Have her lay out her clothes and have her backpack packed the night before school.
No sugar, no sweets, no caffine.
Put her in a regular exercise program with structure to help wear her out.
In bed and up at the same time everyday of the week.
2006-10-17 18:19:08 · answer #2 · answered by fireeyedmaiden 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the people trying to convince you ADD doesn't exist. It is a real condition and it needs to be managed. People with ADD have certain strengths they can use to their advantage but they need guidance and sometimes medication. All I have is my own experience with an autistic child - when my husband got like that, I left him. I have been lucky because he hasn't meddled in my decisions. The youngster above also has good suggestions because they're from experience.
2006-10-17 18:03:21 · answer #3 · answered by Kacky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello, I'm 16 I have ADD and I know exactly what you are feeling. When I was 11 I moved to a new school where no one knew me, the shock spun me out of control. I quickly failed all of my classes, became deppressed, gained weight, got sick alot, and very short tempered. My mom forced me into counselors, taking pills, and constant pressure from her. I didn't want to do anything at all. I refused I had ADD, I hid my pills under my tonge then spit them out, I lied all the time about school and my grades. My dad thought there was nothing wrong with me and even sued my mom in court over the matter. My parents were divorced so I felt like I was always choosing sides and in the middle.
Around the begining of the next school year i came to a hault. I thought about suicide all the time. I even tried to cut my wrists. One night I wrote in a journal and said all of the things that made me want to hurt myself. I reread that page for hours. It was at that point that I decided to get help and regain the life I once had. I showed the page of my journal to my mom, and as I watched here read I could see her tears shed on that paper. I couldn't believe that I actually wanted her to be that way. If I killed myself than that would be the expression on her face when she found me dead. How could I have ever thought of doing that to her, my own mom. From then on I have always tried to do whatever I can to make myself better. I tried the medications and eventually found one that worked. My dad was still Headstrong of his opinions untill I told him the entire truth of the matter and that I wanted to take these medications by my own will, and not someone elses. My advice to you is to have a deep conversation with your husband about how you feel, he needs to see that there is no harm in trying and to keep an open mind. Keep trying different types of Meds., If I could guess I'd say that they're not working because she isn't taking them. For the meds. to work you need to find the right dose and always take them consecutivly, or they will not work. Try Depression meds. too, I guarentee she is more depressed than you think. If she gets in trouble you need to be just as harsh as you would with a non ADHD child. A punisment must stay the same, but you must have her teachers know the situation, and allow more time and chances for school work. I know you may think that she is crazy and you cant stand it, but you must keep your cool our you'll never get her cooperation, just more rebellion. Talk to her as much as you can and make sure she feels loved and not useless like I did. Never put her in the middle of a conflict between you and your spouse. Provide a strict, strict, strict, routine and enviornment, and enforce it always. Phisically check on things she's sopossed to be doing and be clever, cause she will find ways to trick you. Don't force her to see a therapist she doesn't like, try different ones. Keep her envolved in things like sports, and dance, and especially music. I cannot stress how much being able to play an instument can help childrens minds. I have been through it all and I am basing my advice on my life, but remember to always try different thing till you find something that works for you her and your husband. Please love her as much as you can and telly your proud of her. Don't let her self-esteem drop so she feels like I did. Nip this in the butt while she is still young. Please include her on your decisions. Please take my advice. It will help you I promise.
-Never stop the love
2006-10-17 19:41:48 · answer #4 · answered by cougarbrooke08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try looking into these resources helping ADHD naturally.
"BEING IN CONTROL:Natural Techniques For Increasing Your Potential And Creativity For Success In School."
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/9659025114/
"Being In Control : Natural Solutions For ADHD Dyslexia and Test Anxiety'.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/9659025130/
2006-10-25 13:58:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
http://www.ritalindeath.com/
Info for Parents of Children who are being Pressured to Diagnose and Drug their child for ADHD.
*CHEM-TOX* http://www.chemtox.com/cancerchildren/default.htm
Researching effects of Chemicals and Pesticides upon health
*Center For Childrens Health and The Environment*
http://www.childenvironment.org/
Research examining health hazards of environmental toxins.
*Childrens Health Environmental Coalition* http://www.checnet.org/
A national non-profit organization dedicated to educating the public, specifically parents and caregivers, about environmental toxins that affect children's health.
2006-10-17 17:57:51 · answer #6 · answered by A Healthier You 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
OMG!!!! mkay
My mom took me to shrienks and put me on meds and crap like that and im fourteen and um.........uh.. they kept me off a buncha sugar and put me on this diet thingy that the doc gave us....so yea, its helped and uh.....yes i go to iss a lot but like...my parents make deals w/ me. like if i stay outta trouble they'll buy me a new t shirt or something. yup
i hope i helped
(bet i did)
:D
:D
2006-10-17 17:58:38 · answer #7 · answered by Just wonderin' 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your husband is correct, and there's no such thing as ADHD. GET HER AWAY FROM THOSE DUMB PSYCHIATRISTS AND THEIR FILTHY, HARMFUL DRUGS!
YOUR HUSBAND IS CORRECT - LISTEN TO HIM!
HE'S CORRECT CORRECT CORRECT CORRECT CORRECT!
GET HER AWAY FROM THEM NOW! HE'S RIGHT AND YOU'RE WRONG ON THIS ONE!
Excellent post below. Check out those links.
2006-10-17 17:54:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋