I have a 13 yr. old brother and it seems he is odsessed with porn pictures and girls...how do i talk to him?

Question

I dont know how to talk to him with out him getting mad at me and not talking to me for awhile. I dont want this to ruin our relationship.

Answer 1

Tell your parents...sounds like an issue they need to deal with.

Answer 2

Well he probably is obsessed with porn and girls, he's 13. If you want to talk to him just make sure you're not interrupting the national pastime, and I'm sure you should be able to get along like you used to. As long as you're not talking to him about porn and girls. That's not really what a big sister does. He doesn't need you poking your nose in his business. At his age, in this country, there's usually a certain amount of embarrassment about this stuff, so of course he's going to get mad if you start talking to him about, no matter how delicately you broach the subject. If it's developing into something unhealthy, where it's taking away from doing actual activities with other people or he's staying up until 5 AM at the computer, then you might want to tell your folks. This is probably just part of the normal discovery of the opposite sex. Just be there if he wants someone less judgemental than his parents, but otherwise leave it alone.

Answer 3

If you are really concerned about it, which you should be, just try sitting him down and being honest with him. Tell him how you feel and that you don't want him to get mad at you or anything, but you are worried about him.

Porn is a bad deal no matter what and it needs to be confronted and stopped!!! If he gets defensive and mad, then you may need to go to your parents or maybe even a school councelor.

Your brother is way too young and he needs help. This could get way out of hand and turn really bad. It is just like drugs or alcohol and it's a disease, an addiction. He needs help!!!

Good luck, my prayers are with you. I hope he can get help!!!

Answer 4

He sounds pretty normal, really. 13 yr old boys are obsessed with girls, and especially any kind of porno they can get their hands on. When I found porno mags in my son's room when he was about 13, I and his step-father each had a talk with him, separately. We assured him that we were not angry with him for having the pictures but that this did not depict real life, women are not objects, they are to be respected, etc.

Answer 5

To me, it seems as though Patricia D has the right idea. Congratulations to you and your husband for not "freaking out" on the poor kid! I remember what it was like when I was a young teenager. When I got caught with pornography, it was like it was the end of the world. I wish that my parents would have discussed the issue with me calmly and rationally, without resorting to making me feel so guilty about it.

Answer 6

first of all how is he getting all this material? and the more education he gets about sex the least harm he might put towards sex especially if he is getting off by looking at this stuff,i would just let him know your their if he ever wants to talk,dint pressure him about it he definitely don't want to be lectured,just listen and answer any question he might have leave the door for communication open.he will be okay .don't ruin your relationship over it its there nature to do that all men do it at all different ages.

Answer 7

guys will forever love porn.... but if you guys are religious.... remember this, pornography is adultery of the mind.... so porn is sin and though God loves you, he hates your sin.... and God forgives those who ask for forgiveness and he has to remember that it's sin, because it's also sin to know that what you are doing is Sin but still do it anyways.... so he's playing with sin and that's bad.... really bad... and if you're NOT RELIGIOUS, then 13? he's breaking the law and could potentially get your parents in ttrouble.... tell him that it might seem good, and it might be good..... but he wouldn't want for his parents to get in trouble for something he's doing.... and make sure that he understands you're just trying to protect you parents.... not tell him he should stop it because it's sick and wrong..... sensitivity... and don't be rough.... if he gets mad.... then let it go, worry, but don't squeel, and make sure that he learns his lesson some how.... then he'll stop

Answer 8

Don't nag him_it is OK for him to like girls! Try to get him to go to a good movie with you or out bowling. Something to get his mind off porn for a while. Just don't mention this to him! Let him go out with you and some of your friends! Talk to your parents about it when he is not around! Have them just catch him at this and not mention that you told them! Maybe your parents will work with you to get everyone to do more as a family! GOOD LUCK and it is nice that you care for your brother and are trying to help him!

Answer 9

Tell him his obsession makes you uncomfortable and to tone it down. Don't be judgemental or obnoxious about it.

But you should realize he is a teenager and it's perfectly normal for teenage boys to be interested in girls, and even porn. Even so, there has to be boundaries. If it makes you uncomfortable, you have a right to speak out about it.

Answer 10

He's going thru puberty for crying out loud. Its called hormones. It's normal. Im not saying a line shouldn't be drawn tho.

Answer 11

This is not a conversation for you to have with him...it is up to his parents to discuss this with him. He does need this issue addressed, or else he is going to grow up with a distorted sence of how women should be treated and what they are worth. Unfortunatley, you see examples of this supposedly innocent behavior growing out of control with men objectifying and using women as they grow into adults.