am feeling trapped and frustrated and longing to live alone. Anyone else dealing with an ill spouse? Have you stayed married? Am so tired of dealing with the illness but always promised I'd be there...is there a limit to one's ability to handle these situations?
2006-10-17 15:28:40 · 7 answers · asked by OliveRuth 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
has a good doc and meds..good years/ bad years...in touch w/NAMI for years..just so done..if it weren't for my vows...and btw.. people w/mental illness often self medicate w/drugs/alcohol..it happens all the time
2006-10-17 16:05:59 · update #1
oh jinx I do understand..and he has always taken meds and I do get the anguish...but every time he cycles down it takes a huge chunk out of me and it's just so hard...I have great understanding and empathy for anyone dealing w/any mental illness and am a staunch supporter...
2006-10-17 17:10:43 · update #2
This is one of those questions I just can't let go of, Olive Ruth. Obviously you need reassurance. With that much strain for so long, anybody would. Under that much strain, we sometimes do really stupid things and regret them and wonder why. We wonder what are we doing wrong when they aren't doing all right..We start believing that Karma crap someone else talked about here. We second guess ourselves. We question our worth. And sometimes we get as crazy as they are; for us, it passes a little bit easier.
I can't offer advice. You are already doing just about anything you can do. Especially, you stayed when you wanted out. Most people don't seem to realize how hard that can be.
I have a great deal of respect for you, and know you are really hurting bad this week. I believe your focus will change back to where it needs to be. You can't help him unless you take care of yourself. You are doing the best you can do, and that is all anybody can do. My prayers are with you.
2006-10-17 18:14:23 · answer #1 · answered by bob h 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. My hubby is bipolar too. Sometimes I think I just can't take anymore of his outbursts, and then his apologies. He can't take meds because he has a CDL and his job won't let him. Can ur hubby take meds. I am so sorry. It's hard living with all the unstableness. For me it's only been 4 years, so I give you kudos for sticking in it this long.
Your man needs help, but keep remembering he is a human being and needs more love and support than most because of his condition. He might treat you like crap, but deep down you are probably the only support system he has. Try to get him professional help.
God Bless
2006-10-17 22:38:37 · answer #2 · answered by manicschematic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm speaking on your husbands side.
Have you ever thought about what it's like for people like us to have bipolar? What scars it leaves on us, knowing we're causing hell for those around us? Do you have any idea how much worse it will get if you leave him? Taking a few yelling arguments every now and then is nothing to what goes on inside of us. If he hits you thats a different matter. Especially since he's not on any meds this is just one thing you'll have to learn to deal with. If you knew about his bipolarism before the wedding, why did you marry him?
2006-10-17 23:40:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are committed in staying then you need to seek some professional advise/counseling or a support group.
I have a brother that is suppose to have bi-polar disorder but it seems pretty strange to me that his bi-polarism sure stays in check when he is dealing with someone big enough to whip his butt!
I personally don't believe in this diagnosis.
In my opinion bi-polar is a fancy label for being spoiled or just a method of manipulation.
How did this country get so many new labels for behavioral problems that our grandparents never had yet seemed to raise happy,healthy and well adjusted children.
A good butt kicking or whippin cured alot of things back then and alot of children just simply learned to handle their "bi-polarism"
Another thing I notice about people with this diagnosis is that they are usually users of alcohol and drugs. . . is this a possibility?
Any person diagnosed bi-polar who uses alcohol or drugs only make the situation worse.
PLEASE remember that this advise is only my opinion.
I have many years experience in the medical field but psychiatry isn't my field.
2006-10-17 22:40:10 · answer #4 · answered by Just Q 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I fear in the spiritual sense if you walk away you will have to deal with it again another time. You are fulfilling a karmic debt at this time. I understand what you are going through because my brother is also bi-polar and I can only take him in small doses and he was never able to find a woman to marry as a result of this. My only true solution to this is prayer. Law of Grace takes precedence over Karmic debt.
2006-10-17 22:36:09 · answer #5 · answered by soniaatcalifornia 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It can be very frustrating. Have you tried finding a support group for family of mentally ill? Look up NAMI.org. on the computer. They may be able to help you find one in your area.
2006-10-17 22:33:07 · answer #6 · answered by lucy02 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it happened to me my husband was sick for 2 years,but doing good now,but let me tell you it was the longest 2 years in my life,but thanks to a good therapist and Zoloft he is now going to collage full time and looking forward to a wonderful future.but it took a lot of different drugs and omg a lot of ups and downs more downs than ups for a long time.myself there were times that i wanted to just RUN away but then i remembered my vows when we got married in sickness and in health.so i stayed and now I'm glad Idid.has your husband ever went to the doc?if not get him in quick they have a lot of new drugs out there that DO WORK!!!good luck and god bless....
2006-10-17 23:00:54 · answer #7 · answered by kitty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋