My mother and I have always had an EXTREMELY close relationship. she was my best friend up until about 6 months ago when she decided to move from idaho to illinois to get back together with a former ex (abusive) boyfriend from about 16 years ago. She told me that b/c so many years had passed he had changed alot and was a better man. so she divorced my step dad and left my 17yr old brother to live with her friend, and moved across the country. i went with her because i figured there would be some good opportunity for school. when we got here we found out he lives in his parents basement, was addicted to oxycontin, was an alcoholic, and numerous other very bad flaws. regaurdless-she married him a month later- divorced him the next mo. and moved back to idaho-now its been 2months and she told me shes moving back here to illinois because she "loves him and has to try to make it work". Again abandoning my brother. ive lost all respect. i dont know who she is anymore. Give up? plz Help
2006-10-17 14:23:52 · 9 answers · asked by stuckintheburbs 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your brother is 17 years old...I don't view leaving an almost adult child as abandoning him. I was on my own when I was 16 1/2 didn't hurt me a damn bit. At 17 he is perfectly capeable of "fending for himself" and if not he should go to CPS and tell them that his mommie abandoned him. Then the courts will get into it and have mommie arrested and a 17 yr old placed into forster care until he turns 18...What is wrong with YOU taking your brother in?
2006-10-17 14:29:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Amanda, Im so so sorry that you and your brother have been put through that. There isn't anything you can do about it, your mother sounds like she is very much a co-dependant person and this shows in her action of wanting to make herself happy at the expense of her children. All you can do is be there for your brother and know that none of this is your fault or brohters fault. You look after you sweety and your brother. No one can save your mum from her mistakes except your mum and I know this from experience as I use to be co-dependant myself but am now very independant after years of self work. Focus on your life and your hopes and dreams and don't get tangled up with you mum and her life. You can love your mum, just stay separate from her lifestyle.
2006-10-17 14:35:23 · answer #2 · answered by Linda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother will be always your mother. You have to respect her and try to love her, though she made bad decisions. You will be a mother too when you get married.
In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives you air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives you water to drink and food to eat.
God gives you a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves you, and you are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
(Digestion of above can even prevent depression and suicide attempt.)
2006-10-17 14:37:28 · answer #3 · answered by Moriahho 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, that's not good, I'm sorry for all that you are going through. I say let her do her own thing and love her anyhow, parents are people to and make mistakes. Just be there when she needs someone to talk to, but don't be afraid to tell her what you think, honesty is the best policy. Take care and good luck.
2006-10-17 14:31:24 · answer #4 · answered by Windy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, try understanding her. You guys might have 2 different opinions on something. So yea, try to get alone with her and kinda have like a chat with her, saying something like I don't like what your doing and try to come up with a resolution that will work with both of you. Then say something like I love you and conflict has ended. I've once had the problem like that.
2006-10-17 14:35:02 · answer #5 · answered by abominationzxd 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sadly love can be a completely irrational thing. I really don't think there is much you can do, all i can think of is to talk to her about why you don't like what she is doing and say why.
2006-10-17 14:29:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to go to al-anon meetings. Not much you can do but don't go with her this time. Common sense tells you it won't work so don't get drawn into again.
2006-10-17 14:34:36 · answer #7 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU DIDN'T SAY HOW OLD YOU ARE. YOUR MOM SOUNDS TOXIC TO ME,HOWEVER SOME DAY SHE MIGHT NEED YOU. THAT DAY YOU WILL HAVE THE BALL IN YOUR COURT. I HOPE YOU TALK TO SOMEONE SO YOU WILL KNOW IF YOU SHOULD SERVE THE BALL BACK. I DON'T HAVE MY MOM ANY MORE. I WISH I DID
2006-10-17 14:49:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
2006-10-17 14:30:45 · answer #9 · answered by Rollin' VIp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋