My 13 year old daughter was caught red handed with a cell phone that didn't belong to her and when asked how it got in her bag she claimed that someone put in there. Yea right! Please help me!! Also she has been lying about school work and her grades were very poor at conference time last week. Need help with her!!
2006-10-17 14:01:55 · 9 answers · asked by gemini72 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I did make her return the phone plus write a letter to the mom and the daughter each saying why she did it and then she mailed them. Also after she was caught with the phone she wouldn't tell me at first why she took it so I drove to the local police station and told her if she wouldn't tell me then she could go in and tell the police what she did. I opened the car door and told her to go inside or tell me...she told me it was to get my attention. Also about the grades she has 2 weeks to pull up her grades or she will be off mock trial at school. So I didn't ground her from anything at home since this was punishment enough. And no she's not having sex since she is not allowed to date until she is 16 per her dad and me.
2006-10-17 14:53:58 · update #1
THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG.
OUR DAUGHTER RAN AWAY YESTERDAY AND IT STARTED WITH LYING AND THEN STEALING AND THEN GRADES. SHES FAILING 4 CLASSES AND ITS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSES FAULT.
TALK TO HER. DON'T YELL. PLEASE DON'T YELL.
DON'T BE HER FRIEND EITHER. LET HER TELL YOU IN HER OWN WAY WHY SHES BEING LIKE THAT.
LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN
2006-10-17 14:08:21 · answer #1 · answered by TROUBLE 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
About her schoolwork, I can't help you because I feel that by the time a child is in middle school (jr. high) they are responsible for their own schoolwork and if it isn't done then they are the ones who will fall back a grade and they will have to pay the consequences of such. Again as far as stealing the phone. IF she has a cellphone of her own I would take it from her and find a charity that accepts used phones (several do now) and donate it. She would also be paying off the balance of her phone charges. Frankly I would have let her be arrested, by 13 they know the difference between right and wrong. She needs to learn a few concqueces to the choices she is making.
2006-10-17 21:37:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, find out where the cell phone came from and whose it is. Go with your daughter and have her return the phone and apologize for it. This will be slightly humiliating for her, so she won't forget it. If you let her get away with it, it will only happen again, maybe in another form.
Then have her sign up for community service or volunteering somewhere in the neighborhood. Drive her to her shifts everytime to make sure she is actually there. Grounding, or leaving a child with nothing to do but watch tv or sit on a couch, only further rotts their brains. Rather, have them do something productive with their time.
In terms of her schoolwork: set up a system with her teacher where she has to return the completed homework with your signature on it. Of course you won't be DOING the homework for her, but this way it is actually being done. You can even help her with some of it, in a calm/no yelling environment, if she needs it. This activity may also be a bonding experience and might even provide the necessary attention or love that she is currently lacking.
2006-10-17 21:33:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What were the consequences for stealing the phone? Or for poor grades, and lying? Sounds like a cry for attention. Until she is made to be accountable for her actions...whatever they may be, she will continue this pattern of doing without thinking.
2006-10-17 21:09:36 · answer #4 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ground her for a long time. lik 2 months take away her cellphone and computer and she probably has some bad friends so take her to church where she will meet some better ones or if ur not religous YOU spend more time with her and help her with homework and stuff.
2006-10-17 21:11:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to approach the situation calmly. Obliviosly your daughter is stressed out or lacks self confidence in some area in her life what you need to do is talk to her. Put yourself in her position think how you would feel.
~Nikki~
2006-10-17 21:07:13 · answer #6 · answered by BehindThisSmileIStillLoveHim.... 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down and have a nice long talk with her.....start by taking away privileges until she straightens out (ex. phone, tv, computer, hanging out with friends, etc)....she'll straighten up real quick....trust me!!
2006-10-17 21:36:16 · answer #7 · answered by honey_bear_21_1999 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you better tell your daughter not to be so grimey, no one likes a theif, tell her to grow up
2006-10-17 21:04:22 · answer #8 · answered by chuckleburry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she might be having sex with guys and that kind of bad stuff........starting to remind me of the maury show......
its hard to make a child study when they dont want to........
2006-10-17 21:07:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋