I know this sounds weird, but could someone help me?

Question

this problem of mine probably seems really minor to some, but to me, it's not. i'm hoping someone with a similar experience can help or somebody who has some advice please!

sometimes when I go in stores or walk in a place, I start feeling a little afraid...of how i look to other people, how my expression is, if i look weird or funny to them, or if my face is red. i know strange huh?

i think this might stem from when one of my "friends" from school made a comment to me, "why are you smiling? you always smile."

how can i learn not to worry when i walk in a store or afraid of how i look to people?

thanks!

Answer 1

I wish there were more people in the world like you who seem to smile for no reason ... it would be a much happier place to be .... you obviously see those around you and maybe sub-consciously think "I hope I don't look like that" theres a lotta weird people in the world today .... don't sweat it ... if it really bothers you ... come shop in my area ... I'd be happy to see you smile, might even offer to buy you an ice-cream :)

Answer 2

How old are you dear? If you are a teen, in my opinion you can take comfort that in knowing that pretty much every other teen goes through the same thought process. You may have a little anxiety about public places and / or be paranoid a bit about what people think, but generally this is something that you will grow out of.
If you join a club or team, usually that can help you with your self esteem and give you a boost of confidence.
Don't worry too much about what your "friends" say about your appearance. If you are generally clean neat and tidy, you have nothing to worry about. - and oh - about the smiling.... NEVER stop smiling honey - a smile goes a long way and always makes others around you feel better about themselves.

Answer 3

the next time someone asks why you are always smiling, tell them it's your anti-exercise campaign... that it takes less muscles to smile than does to frown hehehe

real deal though, I think all of us worry at times about how others perceive us but there's a time and place for everything - people you don't know and will likely never see again shouldn't be permitted to have that kind of power over you

it's a question of mind over matter... if you don't mind, it doesn't matter

your brain believes exactly and only what it hears... it doesn't know the difference between truth and a lie... if you keep on questioning youself in this manner, your brain will start to absorb the negativity and you might come down with a serious case of anxiety which would be harder to deal with....

you might consider some positive affirmations (takes a bit til they kick in but with practice ohhh they do work if you give it your all)... I don't worry about how I look to people... I am quite fine exactly as I am...

good luck

Answer 4

My god, why not smile? You sound like a very happy, sensitive, and emotionally connected person. You should use this to be in touch with how other's feel for better communication with others, especially in difficult situations. Don't worry about what others think of the way you look. And smile all you want; the world will be a much better place for it!
PS Don't go to the doctor and take anxiety meds. They make your emotional energy weaker, not better. Then you will really be anxious and paranoid and chances are they will give you paxil or prozac, and paxil is extremely tough to quit and prozac makes some ppl suicidal. Just take good care of yourself emotionally. You seem to be more emotionally sensitive than most ppl.

Answer 5

Know that you will never see these people again, so it doesn;t matter what you look like to them. That being said, do you look at people and think those things? If you do, then that may be why you think they do the same thing to you. And I assure you, they don't. Most people are very busy and just don't pay attention.

I wouldn't worry about your friend'd comment. Maybe they were, in a round about way, complimenting on your constant smiling. Or, maybe they wanted to know what you were smiling about so that they could smile too.

If you cannot get over this fear, you should talk to a councelor who can help you better than we here can do.

Answer 6

Hey there,

This is textbook for social anxiety disorder. Especially because you said that you are afraid of what people think when they see you.

Knowledge is power so find out what you can and make an appointment with your MD. Talk therapy can help and you might need meds to assist you . I think you have good insight to why you may feel this way. Don't give up!!

Answer 7

Don't worry about what people are thinking about you. It doesn't matter. Besides most of them aren't looking at your expression or what your wearing or etc. They are shopping. Not worried about you at all.
What's wrong with always smiling? Makes you seem like a content person. Easy to approach and be friends with.

Answer 8

Look, you have just have to tell yourself the truth. No one cares about what you look like, especially if your seeing them in a store..think about they see you coming down the isle and that is the last time they will probably see you again. Why try to impress people you dont even know, they may be rapist for all you know. What I do is just du have dont make eye contact and strut off like you definatey have something good to look at. The thought of them looking at you but you not looking at them makes them look like the guilty party.

Answer 9

Dont bother with what others think, if you want to smile, then smile. The world needs more smiles I say. Next time someone asks you why you are smiling, tell them "life", or "I am alive to enjoy another day" or just plain, " I love to smile".

Really, your smile is sending a wonderful message, keep sending that smile.

Answer 10

As a retired mental health professional with 20+ years experience, and as one who, on occasion, had people say some "questioning" comment about my appearance, I can say assuredly that your friend's comments have little to do with your present day anxiety. You remember that comment as part of your anxious reaction to how you feel you look to others since that comment was "available" to your memory as a way to affirm or deny your concerns, so, for lack of a competing memory to the opposite, you took it and adopted it as something significant, which it's not. You sound like you have a healthy, albeit uncomfortable, concern for you appearance in public, and that's great since that self concern will serve you throughout your life to guide you in how to appear appropriate in social settings, and that can go a long way in improving your life. At the same time, you don't want to "use up" all your social anxiety at whatever young age you may be at, because I'm sure you have a long life ahead of you and you'll need some of that very healthy social anxiety, which we all have, to guide you through all the years and stages of your life. So, don't use up all your social anxiety too quick. It will serve you well throughout your long and healthy life, and people all through the years of your life will be glad you still have some measure of social anxiety left to keep you beautiful and appropriate throughout your life. You sound like you're doing wonderful to me, just slow down a bit. You've got a long life ahead, and there'll be plenty-a-times ahead to be fittingly beautiful. God Bless you.