Ladies: What makes you an "Independent Woman"? And is "Independent" such a good thing?

Question

I hear it all the time "you know what I'm saying, I'm an independent woman, got my own car, my own place, my own job, don't gotta depend on a man to do anything for me." But is that really all there is to independence? Shouldn't you be independent in state of mind? I mean I don't wanna start, take this question anywhere you want to ladies, what are your thoughts?

Answer 1

Independence, can be all of those things you mentioned, however how you pay for them is also going to determine if woman are really independent.

It actually means you need no man nor woman to occupy all of your time that is (co-dependency) however all woman have a trait of it, its the way God made us. But true independent WOMAN will be able to function and take care of our priorities without doubt or question and seek God first before we seek man's advice, and we are leaders not followers. Our minds are sound and not quick to judge, and we prepare ourselves, ie. financial burden, buying a home etc. WE STAND ON OUR OWN TWO FEET, AND WHEN ITS TIME TO SUBMIT WE HEED.! If we need help we humble ourselves, we dont ask for help and then get proud. AND WE NEVER BRAG OF OUR INDEPENDENCE, BECAUSE ITS NOT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT TO BE PROUD OF, BUT THANKFUL ITHAT T IS POSSIBLE.

Answer 2

It is good when a woman can feel that power of independence by making her own money . But, you are right in that it is also a state of mind. What I mean by this is -- I don't think a woman is truly independent if she has to justify herself by making statements of I own this that and everything else and I don't have to depend on no man. I wonder if claims like this are not hiding some hidden agenda, or possible hurt.
An independent woman thinks for herself but is strong enough minded to be open to others thoughts. She is considerate and thoughtful. The other ownings are just added perks of being independent. If that is a woman's main focus (on the material aspect of independence), she is more materialistic.
Sometimes I wonder if that word "independence" isn't some buzz word. The words needed are confidence, reliability, considerate, and trust worthy. I believe that you have these words embodied withing you, then you are truly independent.

Answer 3

I've been a single mom for over 10 years. My ex-husband was physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive. It took me a really long time to "find myself" again. I own my own home, have a good job, etc. so I do have the financial kind of independence (which I think is a good thing), but there's also emotional independence/stability. I'm proud of the fact that I've been able to do so much on my own for me and for my child.

But the flip side is, I've been doing it all by myself for so long that I've forgotten how to ask for - or even accept - help from friends, family, etc. That's been the biggest issue between me & my boyfriend: he wants to help me, and I haven't been able to let him. I don't mean with money - it could even be something as simple as picking my daughter up from after-school care, or bringing me chicken soup when I'm sick. I don't know how to let him do even the simplest things for me.

So, no: in my personal life, being an "independent woman" isn't always a good thing.

Answer 4

Personally, I have my own everything, always have, so much for the material. I also have my own independent thoughts, intelligence and a great deal of wisdom. It is very good to be independent because in most cases, especially among AA's that is the only a woman can survive. If you speak of relationships, the best ones are where the people are 100-100 not 50-50.

Answer 5

When I think of an independent woman, I think she doesn't need anyone to depend on financially or spiritually, she could have only one of those qualties or both. So, she's got her own place, and own car, she's educated consequenting in a good job, but another woman could be independent and still live wit her parents, (this woman is spiritually independent) like, she won't let a man control her or walk all over her cuz she's doin her own thing. She's still got her her sense of dignity and pride. (that's quite a tough question) but it can mean different things.

Answer 6

Great question. Yes, you should be independent in state of mind. It's great if you have your own place/job/car, but if you still rely on a man to fill your emotional gaps, you're not truly independent. I'm only 16, so I don't have my own place/job/car yet, but I intend to. However, I already don't need a man to fill my emotional gaps. I have friends (and my own self) for that.

Answer 7

I do what I need to do to get what ever it is I need to get done. For me, it's not about not needing a man to do anything for me.

I am independent financially, and emotionally.

Is it a good thing?! Sometimes it is, sometimes it's not. I'm independent because I have to be. I don't have someone to lean on. Not that I necessarily want one however it would be nice to have one. But when someone offers to do something for me or help me w/ something, it is very hard for me to accept it.
Like anything else, being independent has it's pro's and con's, which may differ by individual.

Answer 8

It depends on your defintion of independent. I'm independent cause I make my own money, have my own bank accounts, pay my own bills. Yes, I'm independent in my own state of mind also. Those who don't have to depend on men either have issues with them or go the other way. My man help me raise our son, is there when I need him, etc.

Answer 9

For me it's being able to get and do things for myself, achieving my own goals. I have a great carrer working with my head-start class. I have my own vehicle, that I purchased by myself. I like being independent because I don't want someone else taking care of me, sometimes it's ok, but in case anything happened it's nice to know that I will be able to take care of me.

Answer 10

To me being independant is not having to fully rely on anyone else. To be independant you have to know what you want and how to get it. Yes, it is also in your mind, not just your car and your house, anyone can do that! You have to be strong, mature, and smart. If someone told you they were independant because they have a few things, they are an idiot! It is about being mature and grown up also.