Is there anything you can do for a child with seperation anxiety other than medication?

Question

My daughter is five years old and is showing signs of seperation anxiety. I have been told that she should be on anxiety medication from her school counselor.But I don't think she needs medication. Is there anything else I can do to help with her seperation anxiety? Her doctor said he would prescribe her hydroxyzine for anxiety and I could decide to give it to her or not, that it was completly up to me. But I don't know what to do?Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

Here are few suggestions; decide which are more feasible based on what you know of your daughter and the situation personally.

1. Create a situation where she is familiar with the place where ever you are leaving her kindergarten/school/babysitter/extended family member's home. You can do this by creating an orientation where she becomes familiar and safe with the new environment after some time of meeting the people and activities of the new environment.

2. Whenever you go, make sure she has something from home like her favourite toy, blanket or her school bag - just for a sense of security.

3. This might not be feasible if she has allergies or something which prevents this, but a dab of your perfume or usual worn scent on her neck, wrist or clothes can remind her of your presense and give her sense of ease.

4. Make sure you do a proper goodbye when you leave her. It's not beneficial in resolving seperation anxiety to say goodbye a few times then never leave or finally manage to leave on the sixth goodbye. OR leaving without saying good bye and she didn't anticipate you going that can cause some anxiety. So ensure a proper, meaningful good bye that is said once and make it official. Make sure her caregivers and you also tell her that you will coming back soon and in mean time distract her with various activities.

They (suggestions) all maybe way off and not applicable or inappropriate, it depends on what you feel about the situation personally.

Answer 2

I pray Trace that you do not give that baby girl any type of anxiety medicine. She's only 5 years old, she has entered a world outside her boundaries that she's not familiar with, nor is she comfortable with it. You and her family are the people she has known for the past 5 years. Give her some time she will make some little friends at school and also encourage her to talk about school, just bring up anything and everything. Also make school sound like its a fun place to be, books to read, to play games, to learn, and to make friends. And let her know that you are going to be there when she gets out of school. I'm not even certain the school counselor should have even suggested medication for that little person.

Trace my daughter was much like yours at that age, she did not want to be separated from me either. It was as if we were connected at the hip, she was defiantly my child. Today she has grown into a very professional young woman, travels all over the world with her job, and she still misses me. I would try if I were you to give this some time, and talk her through it. I think in no time you will see her becoming more independent. If at all possible though do not put her on medication, I feel that it sets them for trouble on down the line.

Hugs to you, and your little one.
Texas Girl

Answer 3

I am a mental health professional and I don't know about the school counselor, but in my field it is against the law (if you are not a qualified dr.) to give out medication advice. The only person who should give out advice like that is a psychiatrist. I would not opt for taking medication from a family doctor. Although it is safe, a child psychatrist is much more qualified to give you long term results. For an attachment disorder at this age, the psychiatrists I work with would almost always recommend therapy first. Their are always other options for you. Medication for anxiety should be an option not a requirement. A Child/Family therapist should assist greatly in eliminating her behaviors and if you attend consistently, their is a very good chance medication will not be needed, but is always an option. Good luck!

Answer 4

children naturally have a seperation anxiety. my brother had is pretty bad. but, while children are easily bored, they are easily amused, and soon they will lose track of time and wonder where it went.
in my opinion, doctors are more than happy to peg a condition on something that is completly natural in the maturation of a child. Time and patience will tell if there really is a problem, or if she's just a perfectly normal little girl.

Answer 5

yeah Tracy but it takes time, it will be more difficult as she is older now, these things need to be taught from birth if for no other reason than death happens, emergencies happen...children need to be comfortable with whomever you leave them with, they need to know that you will return when you say you will return, so that they can trust you too.

On one of those nanny shows they started teaching it to the children by distracting them with some other activity...they barely paid attention when mom said she was running errands and would return shortly.....I wonder if she always has seperation anxiety or if it is just when she goes to school.

Answer 6

When I raised my children, a long time ago, there was no psycho babble involved. You told your child that just as their Daddy has to go to work, the child has to go to school. There was no hesitation and it worked. If you show strength, your child will become strong too. Just let her know how proud you are that she takes her job at school so seriously and reward her for good behavior, ignore bad behavior and she will get the idea. Good Luck.