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My boyfriend is Jewish, and I am Catholic. I am wanting to bring him home with me for Christmas this year, but he has said that being at a "Christmas celebration" would make him uncomfortable. In my family, Christmas isn't at all about the religious aspects - it is mostly just a good reason to have a family reuinion once a year. Does anyone have any ideas/experiences on how I could make the holiday season enjoyable for both of us?

2006-10-17 10:46:21 · 15 answers · asked by VandalFan 1 in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

15 answers

All inter-religious couples face this. The reality is usually far less uncomfortable than the worry beforehand. Reassure him that no one is going to try to convert him; that he won't have to pretend to be anything he's not; that you love him for who he is, and most of your family will learn to do so, too. You can't promise him that there will be no awkward moments, but you can promise him that you'll be at his side to share a smile and a roll of the eyes when things happen, and together you'll get through it. Lots of others have. You will, too.

I wouldn't recommend trying to combine a Chanukah celebration with your family's traditional Christmas one. That could cause some confusion and make your boyfriend feel even more isolated and "different." Save that for when you visit with his family.

2006-10-17 10:55:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

>>". In my family, Christmas isn't at all about the religious aspects - it is mostly just a good reason to have a family reuinion once a year."<<

its more religious than you think. you are accustomed to it, and do not SEE it as religious, but to someone who does not celebrate it AT ALL its signifigantly so.

honestly I'd say its time to have a LONG talk about exactly how these things will be dealt with, especially at a "bring them home to the parents" stage, its long past where it needs to be discussed.

as said, its just the beginning...

>>"I have a few Jewish friends who have kids so they do the Santa clause thing, which has no religious themes to it at all, its mostly for the kids."<<

honestly thats utterly revolting, and they are doing a severe disservice to their kids. why the hell would they do such nonsense? its disgusting.

Christmas is a religious holiday. even if its been devalued by those who alledgedly believe it, its still a religious holiday.

2006-10-17 11:07:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Well, my situation is a tad bit different, but on the same page nonetheless. I converted to Islam about 5 years ago and just got married to an Egyptian Muslim a year ago. Thankfully we share the same faith so certain issues are understood by both of us. However I spend Christmas with my family and he comes along as well. Neither of us celebrate the holiday, but my family isn't huge on religion and pretty much are more into the family time, decorations and festivities than anything, so my husband has no problem with sharing the times together.

If you could explain to him your feelings about why you want to spend Christmas with them, that would be great. He doesn't need to participate in religious matters and can just enjoy the good food and cheeriness that radiates from people during this time. Plus he can get some nice gifts too! ;-P

Good luck!

2006-10-17 10:54:48 · answer #3 · answered by hayaa_bi_taqwa 6 · 1 0

I have a few Jewish friends who have kids so they do the Santa clause thing, which has no religious themes to it at all, its mostly for the kids. In your situation, if you can go to your parents house and the Jesus thing won't be crammed down his throat ,i see no need not to go, talking with my Jewish friends in THIS day and age, they are comfortable with it. They know he was a Jew, a teacher, a master, these thing we have in common. Yet as I no loner celebrate Xmas and the reason being, LOVE is the real theme, and the only. the rest is you say, he say. So the whole point is lost,on our own egos and false teachings. So this year spend it with the ones you love , for nothing else matters.
YOUR ex catholic friend. I AM. S

2006-10-17 11:01:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Relationships are as much about giving as receiving.

Sounds like you're a "Giver" and have hard times asking for stuff you want. Now is a great time to open the giving/ receiving with you bf ... ask him to make a list about what's important about the month of December to him ... you do the same. Then together talk about what's on the list. Prioritize what's most important to you and make it clear to him that you need this; no compromise. Then let him do the same.

Good luck. My step mom (Catholic) & her second husband (Jewish convert) are married. He usually gives her what ever she wants because if she's happy, well he's happy.

2006-10-17 10:58:52 · answer #5 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 0 0

This is just the beginning of a lifetime of discontent. If you plan on this being a long term relationship (or marriage), one of you is going to have to capitulate on the subject of religion as it won't work any other way.

If you continue and marry and have children, the children would be considered Catholic by Jewish law...therefore, it would make the most sense if your BF relented.

Best recommendation, tell the boy that he'll always have a special place in your heart, but that it just can't work....then go out and find yourself a nice catholic boy to share your life with.

2006-10-17 10:54:34 · answer #6 · answered by mzJakes 7 · 1 1

Having 4 youngsters isn't in basic terms a "funds" concern...yet besides the precedence of having the flexibility to handle them exceedingly on an holiday. so some distance as themes to do to maintain them entertained, some concepts I quite have are: a million.) attempt having a scavenger hunt in and around your abode, like a treasure hunt. the two make a itemizing of themes they could opt to discover (like a penney, a pink shoe, a rubberband, etc.) or a treasure map with a clue to the subsequent merchandise. they could do this mutually. 2.) Crafts. Get poster board and stick glue. enable them to convey mutually small twigs, leaves, grass, and decrease out shape paper and make collages, or photographs. make optimistic and grant them each and all of the concepts they bypass with...glue, crayons, threat-unfastened scissors etc. 3.) you need to hunt for 'toddler friendly' recipes on the information superhighway. Like cupcakes that have gummy worms crawling out, or happy face pancakes. 4.) learn them a e book, then help them make up a play, or dance consumer-friendly to a familiar track. 5.) enable them to play Karaoke contests, and sing alongside to CD's or the radio. 6.) If it nevertheless warmth the region you're, activate a sprinkler on the comparable time as they play on their swing set... wish those help!!!

2016-11-23 16:29:53 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I'm jewish. I love going to christmas celebrations. But It is a little uncomfortable if someone starts praying. I dont know if you guys pray, im guessing you dont. Explain that to your bf and say that it would just be a get together. In return you should agree to go to a Hannukah celebration.

2006-10-17 10:49:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

If Christmas is just a good reason for a family reunion for you then you might as well just become a Jew because you are kind of doing the same thing--ignoring the reason for the season more or less.

2006-10-17 10:55:54 · answer #9 · answered by Midge 7 · 0 1

A trip to the Bahamas is always nice around Christmas.

2006-10-18 04:46:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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