how do you get your 4 year old to pay attention and study school work. he's in kindergargen??

Answer 1

Sorry this is long--but please read all the way through. I worked for 10 years with an expert in this area and have heard too many times what can happen to young kids who get pushed too early.

Your child--how smart or talented doesn't matter--may not be ready for kindergarten. Your child may not be developmentally ready for K just like they weren't ready to walk at 6 months. Most kids aren't ready at 4 because the school work is designed for a kid who is at least 5. (And some kids at chronological age 5 may be developmentally younger and this is absolutely normal. These kids struggle too.)

About 10 (?) years ago a study was done of special education referrals and achievement and child age. In states with December cut offs (so the kids start at 4) the number of children with Dec. birthdays who were identified as special ed was many times that of kids with Jan. birthdays. Why? They were too young---or kids born in January are just naturally better at sitting still in school.

Now lots of folks will tell you that the kid will get ready or catch up in a few years. Not completely true...it's just that the differences between a six month old baby and an 18 month old baby are very dramatic and obvious. The difference between a 10 year old and an 11 year old aren't as obvious to the eye.

A five year old is 25% older than the four. A year isn't much to a grown up, but it is huge when you're four. Are there any differences between a 16 year old and a 20 year old? How about a 32 year old and a 40 year old?

Four is very young for today's "pushed down" curriculum and making him/her miserable now could set them up for years of school failure.

I BEG you, check out the program and ASK if what they are doing is developmentally appropriate. See how that's determined.
If what they are doing is dev. appropriate for the child then it shouldn't be so hard...and paying attention wouldn't be a big problem because the classroom work would be designed to teach the child in the way they learn best.

Contact the NAEYC (National Association for the Education of Young Children) and check out their guidelines for developmentally appropriate practices for children your age.

BTW Please don't go the bribe and punishment route. If the kid can't do it, the kid can't. The brain develops at its own pace and your 4 may not be able to stay focused no matter how hard they try even if they are super-smart.

Don't try to force a child to do what they physically may not be able to do. It would be like announcing to a baby "hey, you're supposed to have 4 teeth right now---get them out here."

Best wishes,
Bookmom

Answer 2

Four years old wow, I can't get my fourteen year old to pay attention and study school work.

Try sitting with him (no more than 15 minutes a night for any homework for a 4 year old!) and talking to him about it. Do it with him. Remember the goal is to instill the love of learning. Don't make it boring or stressful. Absolutely always an adventure and fun.

Answer 3

Why is it that we adults expect this out of our little ones. He is only 4 for goodness sakes. You can't expect most 4 year olds to sit still and do homework. Even if he is gifted I think 4 is just a little too early for Kindergarten. You may want to look into a great Preschool program. There are even some out there that cater to gifted children. Is he homeschooled in Kindergarten or is he going to a Public school? I think they just expect way too much out of our kids. They want them to sit still, do homework, etc at this age and most kids just aren't mature enough yet to do that kind of thing. Makes me so sad!! Making our kids grow up and act like adults. Shame on us!! I say get him out and do something else until he can sit in a classroom like a drone and do meaniless work like all the rest of the kids.

Answer 4

Get him out of there! He's not supposed to be paying attention at that age! That is an ambition of adults forcing their will against the natural ways of childhood, and taking away his happiness.

Answer 5

if he doesnt do what is told.time out. then after a 10 minute time out you will ask him why he was in time out and he will telll you. it is important for children to know what they did wrong. reward him when he does something right. it is important for children to know right from wrong at a young age. make sure he is not around bad influences. that will be bad for his growth. do that and make sure you dont go to hard on him. he is only 4.you should give him lots of love to nurture him . make sure he knows he is equal yet only a child in a simple way. tell him your the adult and you get to make most of the decisions because you know whats best for him and you want what is best for him. tell him you have been through everything he has been through yet keep in mind he is a boy. got all that? if you need more info let me know on one of my questions. i will gladly help you and provide you my email adress. have fun raising him!!!

Answer 6

I don't know, but if you find out, write a book and let the rest of us know how you did it.

I have a 4-year-old in preschool, and I know there's a difference in preschool and kindergarten, but something that usually works in getting him to do things he needs to do is letting him pick what we have for dinner.

Most people suggest giving them m&m's, chocolate, cookies, whatever... That is like signing myself up for a headache (my child is hyper already). Picking dinner makes him feel special and "all grown up", and it's something that doesn't require giving him sugar to actually make things worse.

Answer 7

I question why he is in kindergarten. I assume he is gifted. Athough his intelligence level may be kindergarten it sounds like his maturity level is normal and that of a 4-year-old. I think you need to find a healthy balance between nurturing his gifts and allowing him to be a kid. There will be plenty of time later on for schoolwork, but he only has a little time to play and be a child. Don't waste it -- he will suffer for it.

Answer 8

1. he's 4.... why is he in kindergarden? that's for 5 year olds.
2. if you want him to pay attention, make it fun. make it like a game. same with picking up clothes and toys. make it fun and he'll want to do it.

Answer 9

Turn it into a game. make it fun, use small bribes. My mom got in the habit of using a timer. kids need to be engaged. trying to make them sit still will make him just want to go off and play. if you make school work fun they'll motivate themselves. if he's 4 what is he learning? the alphabet and addition and subtraction? sesame st.videos!!!!!! i used to love them at that age! Very educational. Ask him lots of questions and encourage him to answer. if he gets it wrong, don't even acknowledge it. just correct him and go on every time he gets something right make a big deal of it. NEVER REWARD With TV. Make him love reading. if he's interacting with you, he won't be bored

Answer 10

he needs to be able to play 4 is often too young for formal learning.

however if he has firm and consistent bounderies at home and school then he will beaware of the consequences of his actions and then will concentrate harder and for longer.