Here's my story?

Question

I work in an Intensive psychiatric care unit. Our clients are more unwell and more aggressive than in other parts of the hospital.
I love my job, I am never off sick and have been there 6 years. I understand that working in this environment can be stressful and does pose a risk of being assaulted…But that does not bother me.

8 weeks ago, I was assaulted by a client. My optic nerve was damaged and I couldn’t see. As soon as I got the all clear from the eye clinic, I was straight onto my GP to get me back to work.
The client in question continues to verbalise thought of harming me. Basically he does not understand relationships and felt betrayed that I get on well with all the clients and staff in the ward. So that was the reason I got punched.

2 days before returning to work, the hospital managers decided that I couldn’t go back to work.
I would be working in another ward. A ward where I don’t know the staff, the clients, the routine or the layout. I don’t have a uniform and therefore, I look different.

I feel that I have to go back to MY ward as I have ghosts to put to bed, I need to know that I can do my job without feeling fear and anxiety or having to look over my shoulder all the time.
I don’t believe I can move on from this sitting in a strange ward.
In this new ward I feel deskilled as I have far less responsibility. I have a senior role and do a lot of management stuff. In this new ward, the manager does a lot of these tasks himself.
I also have to constantly defend myself as automatically people assume you have been removed from your ward for aggression towards a client or without knowing me the other staff say “Oh you’re the nurse who was hit!”

I have been in this other ward for 3 weeks now. The work is a doddle, the staff are nice and I have no problems there, but I’m not moving on from the assault. My mood has dipped, I come home from work and cry and I don’t sleep well and if I do, I dream about the assault and the client in question.

Now my dilemma is this….
I don’t want to go off sick as I feel that I’ve let the management get to me…(there are political reasons why they wont let me back into my ward that they wont admit to)
But recently I’ve felt I should go off sick as working in this other ward isn’t helping me.
I’ve never felt so stressed by the management and I know that if they said I could go back to MY ward, the stress would go.

What do you think?

I am desperate to go back to my own ward, I've spoken to ALL levels of management and they say I can't go back to my ward until this client moves on...He already been there for over 2 years and I don't want to be sitting in limbo for another 2 years.
The management scared as his mother a "letter writer"...complains about everything.
They are worried that the client will get agitated hearing me back at work and "may" assault my peers trying to get to me and that someone will get hurt...or the client will complain to his mum that me being in the ward is upsetting to him and she will complain about that.

I can't win with the management...my union say if I stay out of the ward she will raise a grievance...but i'm getting so down about it I just wanna curl up and hide away until its all over.

Oh..and my ward manager wants me back...It folk over him that are putting the blocks on it.

The guy in question is assaultive to females.. has done this before... None of the other females were moved out so I don't know why I have been.
Female staff do not go anywhere near this guy..We don't even look at him and he's been isolated from females since he assaulted the last female 2 yrs ago.
The only reason he got to me was because he was visited by his mother..and came out of the room when I was dealing with another client.
It could have been anyone..but it was me...There are no risks to myself if I went back as I'd be doing the same job ...dealing with the other clients.
The male staff deal specifically with him.

Answer 1

I work in Psychiatry too, and I also work in an IPCU.
I think you have to look after yourself. You say you've never been off sick so I suggest you take some time out for yourself. Your time off due to the assault should be an industrial illness and therefore your sick time wont be affected.
It's very easy to think that you can go straight back to where you left off..But the Trust has a duty of care not only to you but also to the client.
If you being there is upsetting for him..then they have to protect him from that. And protect your peers from a potentially aggressive situation.
I'm sure you wouldn't want your peers to go through what you have gone through.
The thing i'm wondering about is why has he been there for 2 years?
Thats terrible treatment...surely, whatever his problem, they should have identified a more appropriate place for him in that time..
Also..i'm wondering, If he had assaulted one of your male colleagues...i'm guessing he wouldn't have moved out of the ward.
What observation level is this guy on NOW?
What observation level was he on THEN?
What are the risks if you were to go back to your ward?
Obviously you know all the risks and are not going to put yourself in harms way...Is it possible for you to go back to work and not have to deal with this client?
Has he done this before?
I know you don't want to go off sick..Please don't see it as "the management getting the better of you"
Maybe you went back to work too soon?
So take the time...
Get your head straight and who knows....
He'll be moved on and you'll be able to go back to your own ward.
Keep talking to your peers, your friends and if you have a good relationship with him...your boss.
Take care of yourself..cause no one else will and if your not ok...your clients will suffer and you sound like to good a nurse to jeapordise their well being as well as your own.
Let your union know what your up to...consult occupational health and take the time off..
Remember you have 6 months before they cut your wages.
Management are famous for "Knee jerk" reactions without considering the feelings of the nurse.
So don't think they have beaten you if you go off...You went back too soon thats all.

Good luck and I hope they move the guy on.

Answer 2

First off, I am sorry for your bad experience and I appreciate your bravery in wanting to face your fears, but you should just face the facts here. The management can not put you back there or they would be negligent by putting you in harms way! True, there are underlying reasons for this such as legal liability reasons, but it is also for your safety and possibly the safety of the client as well. A properly maintained institution would never allow you to go back there and I fully support that. However, you have been given a new opportunity in a new area and I suggest that you make the best of it. Learn from your new surroundings and try to fit in with those around you and perhaps after time you will enjoy being there. Leave your "ghosts" behind you and look forward. Understand that the management is not trying to punish you and that this was the consequence of an unfortunate mishap. You are certainly not to blame either. As for your new co-workers, you are just experiencing the "new kid" experience. After you have been there for a while people will accept you and you should fit in well. If all else fails, entertain new avenues such as a new work environment away from where you are now and if stress continues to mount I might suggest counseling. Just remember though, there is no fault here. Accept your new position and you will be just fine I am sure. GOOD LUCK

Answer 3

I sympathise with your predicament. I understand where you're coming from, but political agendas aside, the management would be extremely negligent by returning you to an environment that would be unsafe for you to work in.

As long as your assailant is still verbalising threats about you, or remains fixated on you, management have to be seen to make every effort to ensure your safety.

If there comes a time when your assailant moves on or is transferred or discharged (which doesn't sound like it will be anytime soon), then perhaps you could renegotiate your post.

In the meantime, look around either in your unit or elsewhere to find a job that would be more fulfilling.

Failing that, pay more attention to your own mental health. It doesn't sound like you've taken some time out to assimilate what has happened. Sometimes, when you work in a high risk situation, you may find you're quick to brush off incidents like this and react with an "I'm fine, don't worry about it" attitude, but your life IS affected by such events, and your subconcious may be struggling to come to terms with what was a serious physical attack that could very easily have had permanent repercussions.

Your current dip in mood may have something more to do with that, rather than the current job. Maybe it's because of the current job that your mind has more time to think about things, instead of rushing back into the fray without really processing what happened.

I wish you the best of luck, I think you should consider counselling for yourself, just to explore your feelings a little further, and I hope you reach an outcome to this that you can be happy with.

Answer 4

I'm a nurse (although general, not mental health) so I can empathise with you on this. Unfortunately though, staff come second and patients come first - it's very harsh, but that's how it is. Go back to your union rep and ask them to help you write to your line manager and be present at a meeting. You're entitled to that at the very least. I'm assuming you work in the NHS - sadly they can move staff wherever they want to as per service need and skill level, for whatever reason.

Another point is that although it seems unfair, you have more chance of moving on from this than the patient who attacked you has from moving on from his demons. Is there a counselling service at your work? I wish you luck, and hope you don't make yourself ill by becoming so stressed.

Answer 5

u know what debbie - i understand more than most what u r going through. i am a mental health act administer for a medium secure unit i also work extra as a support worker - my unit is a dangerous environment and nurses have to have a course that is moreorless self defence. u have to watch your back all the time.

i can empathise with u totally., but i also understand the hospital managers. you need closure but from a health and safety point of view the managers have made a decision not to put u back on that ward i totally understand this. i am not management as i said im a mhaa but i do believe what they are doing is right.

there is too much aggression and it could end up you being seriously hurt - god u were hurt enough. we have nurses who have been really badly injured.

i think basically what u need to have is counselling - this is no bad thing but u need to move on and have closure. i dont know if u work in a trust like me but some trusts and workplaces have these in built counsellors - please try to seek them out for your own good.

i can also see your point of view. its a tough one but i really hope u dont go back to the ward or u will be pin pointed by the patient. you never know what they are going to do and what they are thinkiing. be one step ahead of them.
take care and good luck.

Answer 6

It's obviously not the answer you're looking for, but it is the best thing for you to be off your old ward. I think you know that already though. You have clearly stated that you know you would be putting yourself and other staff/clients at risk if you were to go back and that should be enough for you to accept the management decision. I doubt they have made it without taking everything into consideration.
The reason you feel so bad is because it's not YOUR decision. That's always hard to take, however, you need to think of the bigger picture and the potential risks involved.
The patient has mental health issues and therefore we are expected to protect him, against real and percieved harm. What if his problems with you resulted in him hitting you again, or someone else?? This could end up with the patient having forensic evidence against him (if he doesn't already) and potentially ruining his future when he does recover from this relapse.
I honestly think you should try to come to terms with the move and we all know moving jobs is one of the most stressful things you can do, (especially enforced) but there are plenty of services out there to help you with this, and any residual feelings you have from the attack. To me it sounds like you are suffering from Post traumatic stress and require a bit of specialist help - i'm sure you know that already. Yes, exposure to your 'fear/problem' is a good method, but if that's not possible then there are other ways, which someone who gets to know you could help you with.
I wanted to point out there are other intensive care areas around - this may sound harsh (why should YOU have to move job??) but if that's your 'calling' then thats your calling....
You know it would be daft of the managers to allow you back onto that ward, they don't need to and doing so would cause problems at every level. The hospital doesn't revolve around one staff member, no matter how dedicated and efficient and excellent they are at their job. (Which it sounds like you were, by the way, in case you thought I was being too harsh.)
Good luck to you though and i hope you can move on from this.

Answer 7

yes, i think you should and im sorry for what happened but its like this he hit you for some reason thats no reason for you not to go back to your own ward ok you have never taken a sick day off but just because of that you are dont let it get bto you even though he physically abrused you you should go back and show that person that what you did dont scare me there worser and you face it maybe that person has jealous ways and took it out on you dont let that be the case to you losing your management trust and other things but me personally i woul of wen tback to my own ward with my head held high you do so an see how it goes dont ever let anything so little be so big to your lose your job you put all you days and skills in.

Answer 8

I think you probably could do with talking things through with someone, is there a confidential staff counselling service you could access? If not, go back to your GP. There is no shame in taking a bit of time off sick due to the trauma you have been through, being assaulted is a trauma, and it is only being compounded by the 'political' situation at work.

Answer 9

Sorry to hear about your plight and I feel for you. I think that you should forget about the other ward (My Ward ) as you put it.

I think that if you apply yourself to this new environment you will get a lot from this new challenge and you will grow into a stronger person. Eventually once you have proved yourself so to speak I have no doubt that you will be given extra responsibility. Perhaps this was not given to you at present as management may think that you are not yet ready for extra responsibilty since your trauma.

I also think you need to find closure to what has happened and perhaps it would be advisable for you to speak to someone from HR to see if they can arrange for you to have counselling.

I certainly would not let what has happend jeopardise your future prospects.

Good luck...and learn from that experience. x

Answer 10

I am a nurse of many years and unfortunately I do find managers in nursing tend to be non listening and non supportive - but very good at covering themselves! It seems no one is listening to you. You just have to do what is right for you, leave, go find another job, try and talk to yet another non- listening person...it is a shame but they don't really gove a damn, just as long as they can tell themselves you are alright as they have moved you in the best interests of both you and the ward. Shame, if they lose you they lose a good worker, but thats' their problem