Enthusiasm in sex, What I mean that is she must Enjoy what you are doing? and let you know that she is enjoying it. And what if she's not? How important is that to you.
2006-10-17 09:13:10 · 7 answers · asked by Alisha 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes its important to know that she is enjoying what you are doing and she should let you know that she likes it or doesn't like it that way you can try something else if it doesn't work for her I mean what good is sex if both ppl aren't enjoying it
2006-10-17 09:32:11 · answer #1 · answered by the Juggernaut 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the man; his level of self-esteem, along with his level of care and compassion for others.
The environment in which in which I was raised taught that sex was a maritial duty for a wife. On demand, she provided a necessary, if a bit inconvenient and distasteful, duty for her husband. For a man who buys in to that philosophy, he sees a woman as merely a service provider. Her joy and satisfaction is not a requirement, nor is it expected. It is not even a real consideration.
A man with low self esteem sees sex as a conquest. His ability to coerce or connive a woman into bed boosts his fragile little ego. He doesn't really care whether she enjoys it or not. Some hope they don't; even using sex as a means to hurt, debase or demean.
If their self esteem is a bit higher, but still below normal, men need more than just the "conquest". They have to believe they are great lovers. In order to boost their self esteem they have to perceive that they are great sexual performers. This requires the woman to appear enthusiastic and at least fake an orgasm (one is sufficient... they probably don't even know about the capacity for multiples in women). They do not suffer comparison to other men well, often demanding their wife be a virgin (so she just doesn't know any better). Her ability to perform is much less important than her reaction to his "performance". In fact, since they are insecure with their own sexuality, they would feel threatened if she agressively expressed hers.
A man with high self esteem doesn't need conquests. He already knows he is a man of worth. He doesn't "need" his lover to be enthralled with his performance. He understands that intimacy is more than just the physical act. In bed, though it's important, and wonderful, he has other goals beyond orgasm, for himself or for her. He needs to feel wanted and desired by the one he wants and desires. Not because his ego is fragile, but because he sees love as a partnership; he is not aroused by forcing himself on someone who is unwilling. He wants her enthusiasm to match his, not because he needs his ego fed, but because he wants to fill her life with as much joy and satisfaction as she does his. Otherwise, he would feel like he was not holding up his end of the partnership.
There is a lot more, of course. But those who know what I'm talking about already understand. Those who don't, never will.
2006-10-17 16:55:42 · answer #2 · answered by antirion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, most definitely. Men who care know when you're faking.
In the same token, it's good to both give and receive. None of us are going to be happy all the time, but to paraphrase, "sharing is caring".
Wish you luck!
2006-10-17 16:18:58 · answer #3 · answered by diagofaldi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me If I care for the person in some way then I care. If its a 1 time thing no not...
2006-10-17 16:18:32 · answer #4 · answered by Scott 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Great question. Participation is good.
2006-10-17 16:18:49 · answer #5 · answered by big_strong_one 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question!
2006-10-17 16:15:24 · answer #6 · answered by souljagirpart2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
huh?
2006-10-17 16:15:21 · answer #7 · answered by NNY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋