My boyfiend and I have been together for 3 years and have lived together for 2 of them. He will not let me get birth control and he will not touch me with out a condom. I dont understand why he acts this way. He also keeps telling me we will be getting married soon.... but I still dont have a ring. and Im losing hope. We also hardly ever have sex. (he tells me its not important to him) but he is always downloading porn and "taking care of stuff in his own way." when I find this out I feel crushed. Lefted out and alone. I know Im not bad to look at I get asked out ALL THE TIME. so why is he not intrested in doing things with me? Someone help Im losing my mind. p.s. he dont have someone on the side I dont give him the chance for that.
2006-10-17 09:01:00 · 10 answers · asked by janinepa2002 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds like he is insecure. First things first... he should not have to let you or not let you do anything. If you feel you should get on birth control - DO SO and you can always get the shot then he will never see you take a daily pill. Better to be safe than sorry. If he has no sexual interest in you meaning perfers porn or his own pleasure there is definitely a problem with him... Ask yourself what man doesn't like sex??? Marriage is just away to keep you under his control.. Take a look at the big picture and decide if you should just move on.
2006-10-17 09:10:11 · answer #1 · answered by Donna13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think a little communication can go a long way. Also tell him how you feel when he does the porno thing on his own. Tell him you are interested in marriage and if he is serious, then you need to set a date, if he blows you off you should take that as a hint to get your stuff and hit the road. Just remember you are a princess and you should be treated as such....there is always one guy out there that will treat you the way you deserve. I would definately try talking first. As for the pill, be glad you're not taking it, it can make you gain weight, YUCK!
2006-10-17 16:09:30 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, he doesn't own you. Nor does he have any say over what you choose to do with your own body. Second, you need to leave him. He will not let you get on birth control, but he will not have sex with you and he his downloading porn? Sounds to me like he is controlling you. He wants to have his fun and have his good woman at home too. If you are not happy, change the situation. You need to LEAVE HIM and get your own place. Don't bother talking to him cause he obviously doesn't want to talk about it. Instead, let your actions do the talking for you. Please girl. He is lying to you. He says that sex is not important but he takes care of it in his own way. Please. Take care of yourself, he obviously isn't.
2006-10-17 16:09:37 · answer #3 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you two need to open communication a bit better. If you are interested in marriage then you really need to talk to him about setting a date... a ring... a engagement... now as far as you being on the pill I am sure he is scared that you could just decide to stop taking it... if you want to take the pill then go for it. Now as far as him and porn... ask if you two can watch one together... and then tell him you need more lovin!
2006-10-17 16:04:29 · answer #4 · answered by Tricia P 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are both pretty controlling, if you want to go on the pill, go on the pill. If you want to get married ask him, if he says no move on. If he is getting off to the computer and not with you something is very wrong ............ seek help or move on.
2006-10-17 16:07:40 · answer #5 · answered by sharing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmm...sounds like a situation i just got out of....how often is he "taking care of things himself" as opposed to having sex? and how often is he downloading porn? in my situation, and it may be very different from yurs, but my ex was addicted to sexual activities, i.e. porn, strip clubs, porn shops, and it was the anticipation that he was addicted to not the activity of sex, in actuality he was bored with sex...so maybe hes addicted to sex...look it up, im sure it could better be explained...sorry...
2006-10-17 16:06:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say take charge of your life. He don't own you. You make your own decisions. If it is what you want then go for it. If you are not happy do something to change that. Even if it means moving on.
2006-10-17 16:05:11 · answer #7 · answered by omvg1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's the madonna/whore complex, where they see you as untouchable because your not a whore. watch the third and fourth seasons of "sex in the city" read "the rules" and start following them! it's hard at first but don't you cry, make him cry a little and appreciate you more! it works but you have to tailor it to him and what makes him more crazy. don't cry your beautiful right! and deserve more out of your relationship!
2006-10-17 16:06:31 · answer #8 · answered by love154100 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on. He is more interested in his needs than yours. A guy like that is not worth being with. You need to find a guy that will put you first.
2006-10-17 16:04:19 · answer #9 · answered by kyrie_eleison_gr 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He could be gay or have bi tendancies
2006-10-17 16:09:30 · answer #10 · answered by Shawn P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋