Need Opinion?

Question

I need some other mother's opinion. I have a 2 year old son that grows like a bad weed!! His birthday is coming up soon and my family asked what they should get him. I told them he needs clothing because really what kid doesn't need clothing. The only thing I told them though was to get it second hand because I know if you look hard enough you can find some really nice second hand clothing and what you spend on one shirt now you can buy alot more if you go the second hand way. I love my son alot but with the way he grows it makes more sense to me to buy them second hand instead of going out and spend alot of money on clothes that aren't going to fit him for more then a couple of months. Don't get me wrong I do buy him new clothes but not as often as some parents do. Any ways my family looked at me weird because I told them to buy him second hand stuff. Was it wrong of me to ask them to?

Answer 1

I agree with you on buying second hand clothes for my daughter. I don't want to spend $20 on one shirt she will out grow in 4 months when I can get 4 second hand for the same price. Or even better.. hand-me-downs. The thing is I would never tell my mom to buy second hand. She knows I wouldn't mind but if its for a birthday or Christmas, she is going to do what she wants to. Most people don't like to give second hand gifts. Even though many people with young children don't mind getting second items, it would be a little weird to unwrap a pair of jeans cousin Joe wore last winter.

You were just giving them a heads up on a way to save money. They may not care about that for a birthday. It is almost like asking them to bring used toys. Birthdays and holidays are a time when relatives can legitimately buy something for a child and not be "spoiling" them.

I figure they will get over it and do whatever they want anyway.

Answer 2

I buy almost all my daughter's clothes & toys at second hand mother's stores. But, I would never trust my family to get something cute or the right size and it can be hard to return or exchange if it is second hand. I'd ask for gift cards or money to use on clothes instead with maybe something small for your son to unwrap. At 2, he won't know the difference. Also, if they buy new clothes (with the tags on) you can always return them and get other things instead with the money.

When you told your family to buy second hand did you say only that without the added justification that they can get more that way? If so, that may be why they thought it was strange, because they were not thinking that they could buy more that way. Most people think about gifts by item not by overall price.

Answer 3

I buy second hand clothes for my kids all the time though I could easily afford new ones. They have awesome wardrobes of almost perfect clothes that were worn a handful of times. I'm always complimented on how nicely they're dressed. That being said, that's your choice. Most people usually like to give new items as gifts which may be why they raised their eyebrows. I'd tell them that clothes are your first choice and if they'd like to get items at a second hand store that would be fine with you as that's where you do your shopping anyway. If you get new items, politely say thank you and enjoy.

Answer 4

I'm on the opposite side of the fence, when it comes to this argument. I have two daughters and a son on the way, and I refuse to buy second hand clothes for them. However, Like all parenting it's a prospective debate, and if you shop second hand anyway I see no reason why you shouldn't make the suggestion to others especially family.

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with second hand, I'm thinking they probably just don't feel comfortable buying a second hand present because of the stigma involved. (birthdays christmas - bigger better - yada yada)
For the record. I am done my Christmas shopping for my daughter and it's all second hand or reduced cost from an outlet store.
I absolutely agree - you get more bang for your buck if you shop second-hand (even try to find a local classified site in your town) Let other people spend the big bucks and your kid can still look good!

Answer 6

My daughter is 6 and growing faster than I can believe! Sometimes right in front of me, if your family is unconformatable with the second hand clothing approach ask them to get gift cards so that you spread out the clothing purchase throughout the year and make the gift go a little farther.

Answer 7

No I don't think it was wrong of you to ask them that. Buying second hand clothing is a great way to conserve. I found a lady who has a son just a couple years older than my son and I buy all his old clothes from her. She buys new stuff, brand name stuff too....so I get a great deal. Then when my son outgrows it all, I pass it on to my youngest son, then to nephews and so on. If your family feels like buying him something new then it's their business. If they want to go the second hand route then, to each his own. Hope that he has a great b-day!!!

Answer 8

My kids grow like crazy. Your family probably doesn't like being told to get clothes. My in laws try to always have the biggest, best, most amazing gift, so if I told them to get clothes, the would be like, yeah, right. I get my kids a lot of second hand stuff. We have awesome consignment sales where I live, and I get the bulk of their wardrobes at consign sales, but when we get gifts for the kids, it is usually new stuff.

I don't think what you told your family was wrong in any way. Just be gracious and thankful for anything they give you.

Answer 9

I think its rude to ask someone to buy your child second hand clothes, don't you have anyone that GIVES you hand me downs? I have 4 kids and would NEVER ask someone to PURCHASE used clothes. People want to buy NICE things for children and if someone else is willing to spend some cold hard cash on something for your child, then let them. ( Why do you make rules on what someone WANTS to buy?) I wouldn't wear second hand clothes from a stranger so WHY would I expect my children to?

Answer 10

If second hand is right for you, great, but you shouldn't ask someone else to do it. If you family wants to buy new clothes for your kids, let them.

Also, I avoid second hand stores, but I have friends that have children a couple sizes ahead of my children, and friends that I pass my childrens clothes on to. I also rarely pay full price, I buy summer clothes now for next summer, etc. Target and WalMart have great sales racks with childrens clothes selling at resale store prices---brand new!