I have a little cousin (12 years old) who lives in a bad neighborhood...she recently has been staying over my house with my boyfriend and I. I told my grandmother that I would be her guardian in the event that if my grandmother passes away, I would take care of her. But now, my boyfriend feels that we should tak eher in now. I am not ready now. We have just moved in with each other this past May...am I doing the right thing?
2006-10-17 08:00:46 · 11 answers · asked by La Caballota 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Adjust to this new dude. I wouldn't be too geared on a guy I didn't know real well (you just moved in together - how long have you been an item? How old are you - 21?) having unfettered access to my possibly screwed up lil cousin. Wait until you see if the two of you have made the right decision to move in together before adding more responsibility to the mix. Where is she now? At your grandmothers?
2006-10-17 08:29:09 · answer #1 · answered by devilUknow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Britni242 or whatever voiced my very first thought too.
Sorry, but I'd question why the boyfriend is saying she should move in.
No matter what its a big thing, if you are not ready, you are not ready.
She's twelve, and its a precarious time for her. BUT if she has a good solid family support twelve year olds are very resilient, smart and tough. Be there for her to make good choices (corny but true).
In short:
What do you mean by bad neighbourhood?
Are you talking drive bys? - get her out!
Are you talking tough kids? run down homes? she'll be fine with grandma.
2006-10-17 15:34:37 · answer #2 · answered by Oh, I see 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your in a tough situation. U really have to think this through, It's not easy raising a "soon to become TEEN" i lived with my lil' cousin once, she was a bit older, but there could be confrontations, and fights that make you wish u hadn't. SO u have to be sure that this is a responsibility that your going to be ready for thru the GOOD & BAD.
P.S. make sure everyone understand what they are getting into INCLUDING your cousin!
2006-10-17 16:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by carly7529 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing I would definately do is make sure that you beleive your boyfriend is a trustworthy good hearted man. Make sure you trust him incase he has to be alone with her. After that, tell your cousin what you expect from her. Tell her all the rules ahead of time. Make sure you can financially support her. There are many things to consider but it will probably be best for her if you live in a better protected area.
2006-10-17 15:14:40 · answer #4 · answered by Britni Gayle 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i think u should take care of ur poor little cuzin.U either do that or eventually somethin bad would hapen to her.and i know u wouldnt want that and if u said u would take care of her wen ur grandmother passes away then i think u should keep ur word and do so. Hopefully things go well..
2006-10-17 15:41:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sound like you already have your hand full with your little one and a relationship with your boyfriend. A 12 year old can be a hand full, where is this child mother and father, why don't they step up to the bat. Unless she has no where else to go I would say definitely no.
2006-10-17 15:21:06 · answer #6 · answered by Ellen J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wouldnt you regret not taking her in if something bad happened to her? My friends son died because the family lived in a bad neighborhood, not becuase of the people he was with, because he was in wrong the place at the wrong time. He was a good kid too!
2006-10-17 15:12:17 · answer #7 · answered by TroubleRose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
can you take care of her right know ? she is at an age we're she really needs someone who can relate to her, and she seems like she really needs to be around you so if you can help her know that bf of yours has the right idea (but watch him) and remember she is your blood i know you want alone time with your bf but if a family member needs you your family comes first . who's to say how long your bf will be-around blood will always be there and mind you he even thinks she needs you right know don't be selfish help your lil cousin lol good luck
2006-10-17 15:38:03 · answer #8 · answered by sexyswells42 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you know at this point you are not ready I don't think you should do it because you will just wind up regreating it later. I was in the same situation with my younger brother, who is now 12.
2006-10-17 15:42:22 · answer #9 · answered by baby61283 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you trust your boyfriend yes. if you dont trust him then no you dont want him hurting the girl
2006-10-17 15:27:22 · answer #10 · answered by Lisa X 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋