I am in love with a girl who turned to prostiution in order to support an ever growing drug habit. I have tried every method I can think of along with throwing several thousand dollars at this dilemma. I have since switched coasts to distance myself from this young lady...but still find myself smitten....forever destined to be the hopeless romantic. This girl has been through the ringer her enitre life....being sold as a sex slave by her mother at the age of 11 and again at 14....being forced to prostitute in her early teens by Mom as well. All in all this girl has had the worst hand dealt to anyone that I have ever met in my entire life. I just want to give her the opportunity to see a different sort of life. I have bought plane tickets, orchestrated "commando" style raids to rescue her from pimps, and a myriad of other things. It seems to me that she truly feels unworthy of being loved....or just does not know how to accept it. I do not know how to give up...HELP!!!
2006-10-17 07:57:07 · 15 answers · asked by rusjet19 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I just want to add a thank you so far for all the input and advice. Keep it coming. I am hoping for something to just strike me as "the right thing". I have tried just walking away from the situation to to no avail. I have never been this way with a female in my life...I am not a baby, I am almost 32 years old. I just truly want to help a person who I truly find to be "super-special" on so many levels. There have been several attempts on my part via providing plane and bus tickets, but she can never seem to get herself to the bus station/airport. Also, I am in agreement that she has to want the help. She calls me at various times and makes a plea for help...but it only lasts a moment. Keep the answers coming and thanks! Oh yeah...one more thing, I have spent over $9000 in the past 2 months...so now "airlifting" her out of AZ and here to NY is financially impossible for me. So that one is out of the question!
2006-10-17 08:47:55 · update #1
OK....Another Update.....I just submitted a "Story" to A&E's Intervention Program.....If anyone would like to drum up some support for me please feel free to email them I tried to find a direct email for the intervention production crew but couldnt. My name is Russell Maffei and the subject would be Selina Martinez. Thanks folks!
2006-10-17 10:35:28 · update #2
omg,i am so sorry!!! honestly, her mom should go to jail!!!that MFing B****h!!!! She needs to burn in HE**!! sorry but she deserves to go there,as for your friend, stand by her! She needs someone who actually cares for her(unlike her mom) dont give up whatever u do! take her to rehab or whatever its called for her drug problem, or get her one of those patch things.
as for the prostiution thing, sorry i cant think of anything but tell her you care for her deeply and that she should stop, if anything take her to move in with you, help her stop and get away from her mom.
Good-Luck to the both of you! I hope she stops all those horrible things! Remember, dont give up on her, imagine being in her shoes, would you want anyone to give up on you?
2006-10-17 08:45:13 · answer #1 · answered by Brutalyhonest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She will not change over night... You can't make decisions for her
with addiction her mind is telling her that she is going to die if she doesnt use and to get more drugs she will do anything!!!
You can take her to a rehab or na meetings but don't expect immidiate results because in order for anything to happen for her she must truly want it to happen... What I highly recommend is that you find an ALANON meeting for yourself which will help you to be ok with your self enough and less dependant on her. It seems that you allow her to have power over you... However she is feeling or whatever she is doing you are letting affect your life.
Life is short... Find happiness within yourself
2006-10-17 15:24:06 · answer #2 · answered by jimmy h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree this girl needs help, the question is does she wanna be helped. I don't wanna interfere but the smartest thing you have done so far is move away. Perhaps you should simply move on with your life and forget about her.
Once you'll meet someone else you will forget her trust me.
Been there done that, and learned the hard way.
2006-10-17 15:16:53 · answer #3 · answered by dragor321 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're the one with the problem. Why do you need this kind of drama in your life? Even if you can "reform" her, what's the best possible scenario here? Herpes, AIDS, a body unfit to carry a child, and more baggage than love can overcome.
Let this one go, honey. If you need to be a missionary, find a church.
2006-10-17 15:31:29 · answer #4 · answered by Shepherd 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She will not change her ways until she wants to. No matter what you do, she will not change until she is ready. Try to talk her into getting into rehab and some counseling. Once she is away from the drugs, you will be dealing with a whole different person.
2006-10-17 15:27:16 · answer #5 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy some high qulity crack and and give it to her for her to move in with ya.
No but seriously, rehab. Honestly, it's a lost cause. Find another baby bird with a broken wing my friend.
2006-10-17 15:26:13 · answer #6 · answered by MisterO 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course she doesn't want your help as she feels that she is not gd enough for you. If you seriously want to help her, get her out and ignore what she say to you at this moment as her self esteem is still very low. She see herself very small. You have to do alot to get her thru as her mind get confused and drift off course. You have to be very firm and clear. You also need to get her to a counsellor and rethink about life.
2006-10-17 15:13:37 · answer #7 · answered by Sob Sob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well she does need help. but first things first, the only way that she will leave everything behind is if she wants to do it herself. if you truly love her and want to help her you need to find ways to do it. she is vulnerable and might not accept the help as she might think that she is not worthy but you could help her, but she needs to put a little on her part too. you are a good man for trying to help her.
2006-10-17 15:11:31 · answer #8 · answered by metalchik 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't make someone see anything they don't want to.
dude, she's messed up, unfortunately, and there's nothing you can do about it.
Nothing.
You can say one thing to her and let her ponder..."You know, EVERYONE deserves to be happy."...
Then let it go. Do you really want to waste time on someone who doesn't deserve you? Or spend time with someone who does?
2006-10-17 15:11:28 · answer #9 · answered by adrian_biccum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Become a drug dealer yourself. She can't resist the hand that feeds her.
2006-10-17 15:12:22 · answer #10 · answered by Justin G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋