i have a very tired daughter having just started secondary school...any suggestions?

Question

My normally loving, even tempered daughter has become moody, tearful, getting headaches and so tired from her first half term at secondary school. She is finding longer days, so much homework and general build up hard to deal with.....any suggestions how i can help?

Answer 1

My son has just started secondary school also. He is finding it incredibly tiring, its a big change for them and the homework seems to take over life and their childhood. My son has only just turned 11 and I feel society is making our children grow up too fast and putting to much pressure on them. They should be allowed to be children. For those who say "we went out to work when we were 14, 16", yes maybe some of us are too soft on our children but that is what they are Children. Give your daughter as much support as possible, don't expect her to have a routine of organising her books for the next day and homework etc,do it with her, sit with her if you can when she is doing home work so that she doesn't feel she is the only one having to do something she doesn't want to do and generally help her, (you may already do this), soon she will be into the flow of it and it will happen naturally when she is ready for it. Support and encourage her and make sure she gets time to relax. Make sure all home work is complete for the week by Friday night so that she gets 2 whole days of not having to think about school. I believe it is the way through it and I can already see the change in my son.

Answer 2

If she's feeling tired, she may be anaemic. This isn't anything to worry about, just iron deffeciency. Very common in teenagers. Feed her lots of spinach and/or red meat, or have take some iron tablets. Also, make sure she's drinking a lot of water. That often helps.
The longer days may be a result of not going to bed on time, also very common in teenagers.
The so much more homework isn't anything. That's just the jump from junior to secondary school for you. I found the same problem when went to secondary school, so not to be harsh, but she'll just have to deal with that.

Answer 3

I have one exactly the same here!

Have you tried letting her have a short nap of about 15 mins after school in her room with no telly or music? She may be being over-stimulated at school - you know, so many people, moving from class to class, different subjects and different class mates. It's a big change.

Perhaps a small snack of some bananas or other fruits as soon as she comes home may help. Sports people swear by bananas as quick energy boosters.

Has she tried to use going to secondary school as an excuse for extending her bed time? Perhaps if you speak to her in her more rational moments and explain that her tiredness is the reason you set her bedtime then she may appreciate that.

Answer 4

Talk to her about going to bed an hour earlier at night. Give her a nice healthy breakfast in the mornings and make sure she has lots of water and healthy nibbles for break times. I give my son cereal bars just to keep his energy levels up and it helps him to stay focused on his school work. She might be finding it hard to settle in her new school due to "the pecking order". So far she's had only her usual primary and middle school friends but now she has to cope with meeting a whole load of new faces. All very scary to her. My son settled after around 8 weeks so I wouldn't worry too much, she's perfectly normal and when she's found her feet again she will be fine. Hope this helps. Ü

Answer 5

Have a word with her school and make sure there are no bullying issues. All her symptoms point to stress- has she any close friends to offload onto? A trouble shared... but she may not wish to tell you. Remember that she is starting puberty too- will be an alien at/for some time! Make sure she has some time to just chill out- no doubt you will feel you can do nothing right at times but you're there for her and at some level she will appreciate that, even if it's not obvious that she does.

Answer 6

Try getting her to bed earlier. About an hour before she goes to bed have her do some calmer actitives. Don't make her do her homework as soon as she gets out of school. She just spent all day doing school work. If she doesn't improve have a meeting with her teacher maybe something is going on at school.

Answer 7

She sounds completely overwhelmed and stressed. Poor girl.

Cut out outside activities or lessons - limit two per week .
Agree a bedtime and stick to it 6 days per week
Ensure regular eating pattern and snacks e.g dried apricots not crisps!
Agree homework timetable on weekdays and stick to it.
Speak to the school for support.
Is the school work too challenging for her - can she move to a less academic stream in the class.
It takes a while to get used to the new routine.
Best of luck.

Answer 8

she should be young and fit enough to cope..look at what she is eating and make sure it's healthy and has slow energy release to maximise her day..she should be getting plenty of exercise and have a sporting activity. she may have picked up a virus at the new school so if diet and exercie don't help or you're really worrying get her to the doc's for a blood test. she may be having bully troubles so try to get her to talk about her day

Answer 9

take her to the docs, make her get early nights, if she is struggling with homework she may need help.
she might need glasses, you get nasty headaches when you do and makes you feel so tired as well.
get some vitamins down her and make sure her diet is healthy adn varied! might help! good luck! wait till shes working then her days will be even longer, her body needs to adjust and in the meantime she might be shattered!poor love.

good lck

Answer 10

Acupuncture or chinese herbs. Thinking affects the spleen according to chinese medicine theory. And the headaches could have something to do with her eyes. Also she might be going into puberty. That wouldn't help whereas acupuncture or chinese herbal meds could help there too.