my boyfriend and i broke up initially b/c im catholic. make sense to anyone?

Question

my b/f and i broke up the other night b/c he doesnt want a relationship without the possibility of marrage in it.(oh yea, and im 16!!) he says that we couldnt go beyond going out b/c ''im christian and your catholic" and he wants to marry in his religion. does he not realize that catholics are christians too? and if he doesnt there are ways to work it out. all my friends think there are too many holes in his story and that he is lying. i think its just what his parents have taught him and he doesnt know anybetter. he's sooo sweet and i dont want to believe my friends but they do have a point. adivice?

Answer 1

ugh ur right! christianity is really a sub divison of the catholis religion! what an idiot. liek you said your only 16, there are plenty of other fish in the sea, and he one that doesnt want to stick around. it could work out. my bf parenst dont like me cause i dont go to chuch and im really agnostic. (dont really know what i am really) and my bf goes to church and is really christain....it can work if both of you make it, but it doesnt seem liek he wants too and if he;s listening to his parents then he just cares about them more than you. just loose him, its his loss anyways right? =D youll find someone better very soon! just make sure hes not another jerk liek your ex.
maybe ou should just be friends with your ex and see if he makes up his mind. but you should definately call hima nd ask him what the real reason is, if you trust him and he says its cause of his religion then go ahead believe him.
ugh if my bf gave me that excuse iw ould kcik his *** (we've been dating for almost 2 years)

i dont believe that religion s hould play a decings factor in marriage LOVE should be the factor. it just shows that he STUPIDLY cant accept you as who you are.....forget abotu him, his loss, your gain. sounds liek a loser to me

be strong!

Answer 2

Well, this question is complicated, so let me tackle the points one at a time:

1) 16 years old is waaaaayyyy too young to think about marriage. Heck, 22 years old is pushing it. You really shouldn't marry until you have come to fully understand yourself as a person. And that doesn't happen until 3-4 years after you leave school.

2) He's pushing you into a deeper relationship. That means he's trying to control you. These things take time. And if somebody is pushing and pushing, that's a sign of an abuser, whether he hits you or not.

3) The Faith thing will loom large in whatever relationship you have in the future. Before you start saying, "Oh, they're all Christian, so what does it matter?" remember that Christianity really covers the entire gamut of beliefs, and one strain of Christianity is utterly different from another. Imagine what would happen if you put a Unitarian and a Pentacostal in a room together to discuss common ground. The results wouldn't be pretty.

I'm Episcopalian and I married a Catholic. And, to be honest with you, I took exception to a great deal of Catholic theology and practice. I wasn't rude about it. But I had honest discussions with my fiancee on the subject. For several years, we attended both churches, until my wife decided she felt more comfortable in the Episcopal tradition. Her parents, however, made our first years of marriage very difficult due to our religious differences in marriage ceremony, our children's baptism, public vs. parochial schools, etc. etc. So you really need to consider this. Overall, your boyfriend is a nitwit, but he does have a point. If you have a strong faith, it is very difficult to be in a relationship with somebody from a different denomination.

Answer 3

That is just plain silly.

You are still only teenagers. There will be plenty of more things to worry down the road. Being catholics and chritian is one of the most nonsense thing to worry about. Once you grow up, you will find out what works and more important between you and him.

For now, if you really think that he is a good one and you two goes well together. Then remain as friends.

If you think he just put on lame execuses, then let it go. He ain't worth the time.

Answer 4

We are not there we cannot advise you. This is no different than if you were white and he were black. To him, if he is sincere, you are not Christian. Unfortunately you are feeling the effects of a civil war that has been over for five hundred years yet is still going on in many peoples minds. You are being separated on someone else's tribal divisions. He is too immature to realize it, if he is sincere. The relationship cannot work because he isn't old enough to date people yet.

Answer 5

I would agree with your friends, that their must be a hole in the story, since you have told him that catholics are Christian's too, and it is so I think he is just looking for an excuse to leave you.

Answer 6

You're too young to worry about dorks like him! 16 year old boys aren't know for talking marriage anyway. Live life to its fullest without dating someone exclusively. Focus more on you and what you want out of life. You will be glad you did when you are older.

Answer 7

There's not going to be much you can do to change his beliefs. Maybe a guy who feels the way he does isn't mature enough for a relationship.

I say move along. It's always difficult to get over somebody, but time will fix everything.

Answer 8

It makes sense. At 16 you haven't dated a lot yet. Your feelings are different than his.

Over coming the differences in others is the major human conflict.

Answer 9

He has NO idea what he's talking about!!
Besides that, he is FAR too young to be talking marriage (and immature)...
You can find someone better who will like you for who you are and who makes some fricken sense! OK?! No worries dear!! Move on!! =)

Answer 10

You're both young, so it's possible that he's just naive.

Take him to church with you next Sunday (even if you don't go to Mass a whole lot) so he can see the priest talk about Jesus. That should convince him.

You could always offer to 'convert' later, too . . . .