A friend of mine and I while in vacationing down in Brazil had a conversation with these two girls from France. We were both surprised to her these girls were advocating being dishonest about having an affair, especially if it was a short term thing. Their opinion was that it would be unncessarily hurtful and could jeopardize the relationship for no good reason. This was a bit shocking to say the least. I felt if this is a common attitude among women how can I trust enough to be in a serious relationship.
2006-10-16 15:43:28 · 16 answers · asked by Love of Truth 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I appreciate most peoples comments and their desire to be honest. However life happens and it is very difficult to do the right thing, especially if it may end the relationship, and it might. The answers I can really trust are the ones who cheated and came clean. But it still does not invalidate any of the others. Kudos for those strong enough to have not strayed in the first place.
2006-10-16 16:34:59 · update #1
Yes! I did a week after I did it b/c I just couldn't tell the guy I loved so deeply that I cheated on him.
2006-10-16 15:45:58 · answer #1 · answered by Steph1490 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I would be totally honest about something like that. I mean if I don't say something, don't know if one of your friend's or someone else you know is taking a trip there too and could see me all over some guy. I think its better for the girl to come clean than to hear it from someone else. But I feel if there is enough trust between both ppl then there should not be any need for flings or anything else. Because you know you can be open enough and tell your partner if you are not really into them anymore or if you guys need to go to couple's therapy before either of you do something drastic.
2006-10-16 22:49:23 · answer #2 · answered by Bloody Kisses 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if they sincerly didn't want to hurt the other person they shouldn't have cheated in the first place! But if you do happen to cheat then be honest about it.I was cheated on and after we broke up he told me(he was also a jackass)in a mean way.If he had told me when we were together then it would have hurt less bc he was honest enough to admit a mistake.If they want to jeorpradize their relationship then don't tell the other person.Let them find out the hard way and get hurt more!
2006-10-18 00:50:01 · answer #3 · answered by Bellatrix/Jimmypants 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would like to think that I someone cheated on me that they would tell me, instead of finding out some other way. But, I know that I would not be able to keep that from someone I am suppost to love. I have been with my husband for eight years and I have never felt like cheating on him. And I know that he would never do that to me. I don't know that all women would be so honest to say they would tell, because I had a friend who left her hubby for someone she met on the internet in another country. He had no idea until she packed her stuff and moved out of the country, and he couldn't find her. It was really bizzare. She didn't even tell her family where she was for two weeks. They all thought she was missing. You can never rule out what a scorned woman is capable of doing, until they have done it!
2006-10-16 22:52:35 · answer #4 · answered by Not the one for you! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everybody thinks they'll never get caught lying about an affair... It always happens somewhere, sometime, when you least expect it... Some guys get the "I might be your child" conversation one day... OR The other party makes an unexpected surprise visit, phone call, or communication...
Someone lets something slip.... It never fails because a web of deceit usually has to become bigger and keeping track of the lies usually causes it to come apart.
2006-10-16 22:49:38 · answer #5 · answered by James B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
so me and my guy have a rule... a strict one... cheating is not an option. period. the relationship will be immediately and permanently terminated if either of us cheat in any way on each other. it is a mutual rule as well, and it completely eliminates the urge to cheat. if the whole idea, what if comes to your mind, you just think... is this something that is worth loosing my mate? of course not, and so, it never even goes there.
but, all those morons out there seem to have made cheating a past time... they forgive & forget like it never happened... its really sad.
so, to answer your question... it is not all women!
2006-10-16 22:46:45 · answer #6 · answered by christy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not judge all women the same, those girls were out for a good time and probably have no love for their mates.
Male or female you can go out and have a good time without jeopardizing a relationship.
and yes I would come clean if i cheated i don't believe in living with guilt or hurting another person.
2006-10-16 22:50:50 · answer #7 · answered by whisper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can assure you that not all women feel this way. They do appreciate honesty and integrity.( and I have been with enough women to know) I did have an affair when I was married and did come clean and I gotta tell you that knowing how I had hurt her hurt me worse than anything I have ever experienced since
2006-10-16 22:47:37 · answer #8 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you love a woman and she loves you and you are open with her: The first step that you have to take is to make yourself vunerable enough to say, "Baby, I never want you to cheat on me". I am serious. Tell her. Be honest with her. I think most girls want to be faithful and want to know that their guys are willing to be faithful and want them to be faithful- you can make it work. It's going to be alright. When you find real love- you will see that worry about her being faithful or you for that matter. Won't be an issue. Best Regards,
2006-10-16 22:47:36 · answer #9 · answered by mivelantine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, ( I would not cheat!!!)
However if that were my thing...
I would have to figure out why I wanted to or did and THAT would get me out of the relationship and not the fact that I strayed!
U should not stay were u don't want to be.
2006-10-16 22:52:49 · answer #10 · answered by FoReal! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋