My boyfriend and I want to get married (no wedding though) have a child, and THEN have our wedding. How can we do this?
2006-10-16 15:29:19 · 20 answers · asked by Curious&can'twait 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
We also want to keep our marriage secret until after our wedding, but that comes after the baby. What should we tell our families for them to approve of us having a baby and then a wedding?
2006-10-16 15:31:10 · update #1
I am sooooo confused!
2006-10-16 15:33:15 · answer #1 · answered by Mommy-of-Twins 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My nephew did that. They were married about a year after the child was born. You are the ones that need to get the license. Do that when you are ready. You should discuss this with your parents especially if you are expecting them to pay for the wedding. If your parents are not going to provide the wedding. see about having a ceremony for your friends and family at a park, in a back yard, or someplace you can afford.
Congratulations.
2006-10-16 22:39:43 · answer #2 · answered by redunicorn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That sounds a little silly to me. Is there a reason why your families wouldn't approve of you being married, and that's why you want to hide it?
Just get married if you want to get married. Unless you're very, very young, they can't stop you.
If you just don't want the drama of planning a wedding right now, see if the judge at your local courthouse preforms them. If he doesn't check the surrounding counties.
But if you want your marriage to be secret, why have an actual wedding later?
2006-10-17 00:51:42 · answer #3 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Instead of doing that why don't you elope (no wedding) tell you parents have kids then renew your vows and have a large wedding that way with the ceremony and reception then? This way you get what you want and your parents do as well. But it is not so confusing. You are just renewing your vows earlier that is all. I don't know why you would want to do this unless you want to have the child in the ceremony so just renew your vows it is the same thing just rewording it a little differently!
2006-10-17 10:56:43 · answer #4 · answered by glitter3317 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It seems like
A) You are very young
B) You are pregnant
C) You are scared and don't know how to tell your family
IF the above are false, I am sorry.
Seriously, you can get married easily at city hall, just call your local city hall and ask for details, some places require blood tests and there are age restrictions at most places. Like, if you are 16 you can not get married without parental consent.
If you are looking to have a church wedding you need to talk with your pastor about the rules at the church you attend.
I really would suggest you find someone you can trust in your family to talk with though, because if you are young, pregnant, and scared to talk with your parents there are other options than rushing into marriage. You need to think about what you want, and find someone to talk to.
2006-10-17 00:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by Blah Blah Blah 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It is very offesnsive to have a mock wedding and lie to people about what they are witnessing (actually a re-run, not a real wedding).
Have your small wedding now, and send out wedding announcements (different from invitations-- check etiquette on how to do these right) immediately afterwards. Then have the child.
When budget permits, host an Anniversary Banquet, which can be as formal as you wish, can have a tiered cake simillar to a wedding cake, you can wear formalwear, and have dancing, etc.
But not a re-run wedding, please. That would be quite rude.
2006-10-17 21:08:48 · answer #6 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the wedding ceremony is the actual act of getting married regardless of whether there is just the 2 of you & your witnesses or heaps of other people present.
once you are married that is it .
It is NOT necessary to spend heaps of money on having a celebration ; you could have the ceremony at the court house / city hall/ wherever with just you & your partner & wittnesses ; then invite family & friends etc for a ""Party "' at your home where you could then announce that you had gotten married .
I agree with some of the other answers in that you sound quite young.
2006-10-17 08:55:21 · answer #7 · answered by fairypelican 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SAVE your money and just get married no wedding. Your going to need all the money for the baby. You can always reunion your vows in 5, 10 years.
2006-10-16 23:23:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why is it such a secret? Girl please your not the first to do this. the thing is your still married and that;s the thing. Save your money and buy a house or a condo instead of a wedding send out announcements and it'll be o.k. I guess. announce your married and everything will fall into place. Good luck
2006-10-16 23:27:50 · answer #9 · answered by LIZA P 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just let then know that you do plan on getting married I hope your not waiting so you can save money because if you have a child it's going to make the money even tighter than it is now.
2006-10-16 23:24:44 · answer #10 · answered by Shonreaq G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's better to tell your parents that you're having a baby but willing to get married. parents just wants the best for their childredn. and i beleive they want you to get married if they fing out you're having a child. blessing from parents and the lord will give you good luck in life.
2006-10-18 00:41:06 · answer #11 · answered by K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋