Where does low self-worth come from?

Question

I come from a good family who was always good to me. I've never been an over-achiever -- but I'm also definitely not an under-achiever. Yet, I feel no self-confidence or self-worth. Where does that come from?

Answer 1

When a person judges others highly and themselves lowly. Try to look at your self with a more loving eye! Be easy on yourself and love yourself more. You will always mean more to others than you do to yourself, trust me. I dont even know you, and you mean something to me already. Take it easy when you judge others as well.

Answer 2

A low self-worth almost always originates from a power figure in your life, who either denigrated your efforts or didn't acknowledge them. Sometimes it's something as simple as someone who loves you saying, "Too bad you only came second." They don't mean to be cruel, but if you've done your best and come in second, you deserve a hug for that, not to be made to feel that you probably could have won if you had tried a little harder.
Another factor is that sometimes we set our own goals too high -- we expect perfection from ourselves. Or we compare ourselves to people who are definitely far more capable, stronger, faster, smarter or whatever, without also acknowledging that people are all different. Someone may be smarter than you, but you may play the piano better. But sometimes we tend to focus on the superficials, like marks, and decide we just aren't up to snuff. And that's a pity.
Instead of concentrating on your lack of confidence or self worth, each day, take a sheet of paper and jot down a list of things that you DID do that day, and things that turned out well, and things that made you feel good. You'll soon have a stack of really positive things that you have accomplished, and believe me, that's going to help build your self-esteem. You can also undertake some volunteer work -- that is a REAL ego builder!
Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Depression can leave someone with very low self-esteem and self-confidence. It is very difficult and timely to build it up again, but with medication and hard work, working with a professional can put you on track again. Be patient though, my self-confidence was so low and it took a long time to regain any of it, but slowly but surely I am feeling better. So much so, I was seriously ill for many years and now I am back in the working world. A true feat.

Answer 4

Well first of all it sounds like you already know that nothing he said was true. You decribed yourself as a smart, attractive, EXTREMELY caring and affectionate person. You have to know that you are an individual and we all have our differences and thats what makes us great, If we were all the same that would really suck right? Love yourself for who you are because you know you are a good person. I would recommend some daily meditation or deep breathing excercises. People seem to let others effect them and its sad. Really he is the one with the issues, that is why he is abusive. It makes him feel better about himself. Be happy that you are free from him now and know that it happened for a reason cause you knew you werent happy. Love yourself. Take NOTHING personal. No one knows how another feels. Stay strong and positive and nothing can bring you down. We are all of this earth and are beautiful. There is much love for you in life and love the compliments you get and use then to feel good. Best of Luck my friend :) You know who you are.

Answer 5

It comes from you...
Spend some quiet time when you can, every evening, and scan your emotions throughout the day. When you find recurring themes (Good and bad), look and feel these, try different emotional angles and analyse/think about them when you are ready. It can sometimes take ages to find what triggers your thoughts of self worth (High and low). Give yourself some room to move (grow), and relax, be kind to yourself.
Reinforce the highs and change the lows
It takes a life time to know who you are. It should/can/is fun!

Answer 6

Low self-esteem, (self-love, self-worth, and self-respect).
Comes from constant assaults on us by other humans.
Criticizing, making fun, talking about us.
But it is all just a twisted mind game people play to try and
keep from facing up to their own short comings.
King Solomon said, "All is VANITY, and VEXATION of spirit!"
He wasn't talking about doing something in VAIN, which would be meaningless. He was talking about EGOTISM.
All the things some do.
Feeling sorry for themselves.
Acting bigger than they are.
And pointing the finger at others.
Is just feeding the EGO. Trying to make themselves feel
better.
But in reality. When they behave that way toward others. It only
makes them feel WORSE!

Answer 7

It could come from many things, but alot has to do with your upbringing and how your childhood was. Was it difficult? Were your parents divorced? Alcholism involved? Many issues can predict your future personality as an adult. Abuse issues, and sexual misconduct too can be leading factors.
If you feel this way a therapist can help sort all this out for you
Good luck

Answer 8

Do you place your self worth on what others think of you? If someone does not like you for ex., then you think you do not like you either. Did you have to perform well in school, etc. in order to be recognized? Now, that you are older, it is difficult to perform to be recognized. Or perhaps you are just clinically depressed. Just some ideas...

Answer 9

from so many sources..mostly from people who have had power over you..family, teachers friends, TV...
but you can over come this..get new friends, believe in yourself..take a class at a Jr college..and no matter how you do in it.praise yourself for taking it..
take up a new hobby and make new friends..and again praise yourself for doing the new hobby..
and do not let anyone tell you that your not a good person or doing something wrong.
good luck
smile

Answer 10

It can come from many places, usually starting in childhood. Or with a friend or romantic partner who put you down. Depression can also make you feel you're worthless. Have you talked to a therapist?