Ok...yes what do I do? I am engaged to someone that I love. BUT I am also having urges to be unfaithful. There are times when we are together and I can't keep my hands off of him and I love him more than life. Then there are other times when I can't stand him. Just the sound of his voice makes me sick. We live 2 hours apart and I am having ot do all of the traveling. He wants me to move in with him. But right now my mom is dying and I need to be with her and he is upset that I'm not just dropping her and moving in with him. What should I do????? Should I stay with him or leave him????????????????
2006-10-16 07:42:30 · 20 answers · asked by misse2341 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If there are times when you can't stand him then you can't truly love him!! To love someone is to love everything about them and what they do - obviously you don't love everything about him.
I would stay with your mum. She spent years looking after you and giving you her love and support, the least you could do is be there for her when she needs you.
2006-10-16 07:48:30 · answer #1 · answered by Dragon Empress 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. He is inconsiderate of your situation. Your mom should be the most important thing right now, and he should understand, and he should do the traveling. If there is a reason he can't come see you (like he is on-call 24/7, or he doesn't have a license...) then he should understand when you can't go to him. If you're already having issues where you can't stand him, things won't change once you're married and live together. I'm sure you do love him, but lots of times, love just isn't enough to make a relationship work.
2006-10-16 07:50:10 · answer #2 · answered by Jan S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, if he loves you in the right way seems to be a major question. He needs to love you enough to be your friend and your wall when things are hard- like right now. Sometimes we love people truelly, but that does not necessitate they are the ones to marry. You will provbably be in love many times in different ways,but your husband or spouse is always someone you just know--its never a question. Your parent will always be your parent, or a brother a brother for instance- its the same with your true love. IF you two are ment to be then when the time is right you will be there for each other. If you have to question it,then either break up or take your time. Listen to your heart- you are wiser than you know.
2006-10-16 07:48:15 · answer #3 · answered by ARTmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont move in with him if you are unsure. That would be a huge mistake. It sounds like to me that your on the path of leaving him. Once you get started down that road its hard to turn back. Your mother should be the most important thing right now and if he was a good man he would understand that. For him to want you to drop everything and move in with him and always want you to come to him, not making any effort to drive to you, it seems to me he is a little immature and spoiled. You have already started in the right direction. Just keep moving.
2006-10-16 07:47:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
SITUATIONS ARE LIKE THAT SOMETIMES, I KNOW ITS THE SAME WAY WITH MY MATE, SOMETIMES I CAN'T STAND HIM EITHER AND THEN THERE ARE TIMES WHEN YOU JUST WANNA GIVE YOUR ALL TO HIM- I'M THERE, BUT I THINK THAT YOU NEED TO TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL, IT'S ALL ABOUT HONESTY,AND DON'T BE UNFAITHFUL BECAUSE IT WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS IN THE LONG RUN IF NOT RIGHT AWAY AND FOR GOD SAKES, HE MUST UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR MOTHER IS VERY IMPORTANT AND YOU CAN'T DROP HER TO BE WITH HIM LIKE THAT- I KNOW THAT THAT REALLY CAN'T BE EASY TO DEAL WITH. TELL HIM THAT HE NEEDS TO HAVE MORE SYMPATHY AND BE PATIENT, IF HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THAT THEN HE'S TOO SELFISH AND THAT WOULD BE A PROBLEM...I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK.. EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE, JUST BE HONEST WITH HIM.
2006-10-16 07:51:48 · answer #5 · answered by ke ke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're in any condition just yet to make any decisions. If you don't know where your heart stands then you need to wait it out and see where this is going.
You have too many mixed emotions so I definitely wouldn't move in with this guy if I were you. You don't even sound like you're ready for commitment.
2006-10-16 07:48:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is putting pressure on you to do something like that to your dying mother then this is an indication of what future events will be like. He will put you in the same situation in the future (if you agree to his wishes now) and will realize that he has that sort of control over you. Therefore, I think that you should break up with him immediately.
2006-10-16 07:45:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You love him and thats what happens sometime you hate that this person is even allowed to breath. You need to let him know that at this time you need to be with your mom because if something happened and you weren't there you couldn't forgive yourself so if he can't understand that then maybe you should leave him alone because he is selfish
2006-10-16 08:03:21 · answer #8 · answered by Ms Drea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing you need to do is tell your fiance that you aren't mature enough to be engaged and break it off. Getting married at this stage of your emotional development is doomed for failure.
Also, he's about the same level of immaturity and certainly does NOT need to play house.
Leave.
2006-10-16 07:45:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're even asking this question, you have serious doubts about the relationship.
Your 360 page suggests you're still interested in your ex, who is still in contact with you.
How did you and your ex split up? Were there times when you couldn't stand him?
I don't envy your position, but it's probably time to choose one direction and go in it.
2006-10-16 07:48:29 · answer #10 · answered by johntadams3 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋