I've known this guy Tim for a couple of months...liked him just as long. I just found out my friend Emily likes him too! I MEAN SHE REALLY LIKES HIM! A LOT! But the problem is...lots of people have told me he likes me...and I'll admit I see it. It makes me really happy and all...BUT I CAN'T BETRAY MY BEST FRIEND! But I REALLY like Tim...I'M SOOOOO CONFUSED!!!!
PLEASE HELP...THIS HAS BEEN KILLING ME FOR OVER A MONTH!
2006-10-16 07:08:18 · 21 answers · asked by Irish Darling 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Get a new best friend. Problem solved. You chicks are so flighty anyway, you'll be done with him pretty quick then you can jump back to Em as a best friend again.
2006-10-16 07:10:39 · answer #1 · answered by letum_ante_dedecus 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If I was in your shoes, I would definitely choose my best friend over a guy. Think about it, are you willing to risk your long time friendship over a guy (that you both like)? Be the better person, and let her have him.
There are so many guys out there. I'm sure someday, you'll feel the same way for another guy. Perhaps not today, but eventually. And hopefully, this time, only you will be liking him instead of both you and your best friend. And when the time comes, go for that guy! I'm sure your friend will be totally happy for you then.
Then again, it's your personal choice. If you believe this guy will conquer your friendship between you and your best friend, then go for it.
2006-10-16 14:22:24 · answer #2 · answered by mjangel28 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OK...i know EXACTLY how you feel
i was here with my two best friends and the same guy... we just stayed completely honest weith eachother and said that whoever he chooses we'd be happy...even tho we knew it wasn't fair to the others we would do what we felt was right...well by the time any of us decided we were going to date him if he liked us, he had chosen one...he said he was sorry for leading the others on but this one was hispick. the other two respected that and let the two date. Honesty is the only way you can get through this. most important be honest with you BF...if she's a true friend you guys can work this out
2006-10-16 14:14:11 · answer #3 · answered by lilkitty4eva 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go up to your best friend and tell her the following: I know that you have a thing for Tim, and I want to tell you that I do too. I've heard from several people that he has the same feelings for me. I just want you to know that if you really like him, that you can date him. You will look like the bigger and better person if you say this. It's kind of reverse psychology because you tell her this with the hope that she will concede and tell you that you can go out with him.
2006-10-16 14:12:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I was recently in a situation very similar to this. It was complicated, but I let my best friend have the guy because she means so much to me and I really wanted her to be happy. They're together now, and although it's a little awkward for me being friends with both of them, I like seeing them both so happy. In the beginning I could tell that he liked me more, but I didn't engage it and let him grow to love her. He still likes me now but he has grown so close to her that he could never betray her. I didn't get caught up in it despite my friend telling me I could have him, I knew she really liked him and that was my gift to her. I'm seeing someone else right now, if we weren't both taken there would probably be something between us even now, but I'm not selfish.
One thing --
If your friend is resentful against you if you date him, she is in the wrong. She can't blame you for liking him, or for the fact that he likes you.
2006-10-16 14:16:44 · answer #5 · answered by ~*Mistress Shadows * 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you honestly believe Tim has some interest in you, go for it. Your friend should understand that Tim has a thing for you and she should be happy for you if things work out for you and Tim. If she's too jealous to continue being friends with you then maybe she wasn't a very good friend to begin with.
2006-10-16 14:12:41 · answer #6 · answered by Joe P 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well here ya go... Does she know you like him as well? Did you ever tell her you had any interest in him? If you have and she still wants to pursue it, then why would you worry about what she thinks? Life is too short to please everyone. I know she's your best friend but really, what if you two are going to be happy and the only thing stopping it is a friend who has no chance.
2006-10-16 14:16:19 · answer #7 · answered by Pimp E 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You can't betray your friend, you are right about that. Guys come and go but friends are forever. Just give the guy a cold shoulder and a wide berth and find a guy that you can be with that isn't so complicating to your friendships.
2006-10-16 14:11:37 · answer #8 · answered by Phaylynn 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
No man is worth losing your friend. You can have any guy, but you only have so many friends. You could explain it to her and see what she says. maybe if neither of you date him, it would be the best.
Again, men come and go.
But friends are forever.
Treat your friendship like its something precious.
They also end, but its harder to get over than a breakup.
2006-10-16 14:12:03 · answer #9 · answered by cici 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't ever let a guy come between you and a friend! However, if you are really good friends, talk to her about it, and see how she feels. If it would really upset her for you to go out with him, then I would say don't do it. Good friends are hard to come by.
2006-10-16 14:13:08 · answer #10 · answered by rebecca_sld 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋