Okay, outside opinions needed. I went out on a semi-blind date Friday. Had an awesome time, we only had plans for a couple hours but ended up talking into the wee hours of the morning. Then, we had the "date-after-the-date," met up and hung out for a couple hours on Sat night, much shorter and more casual than the 1st date, which was fine because our schedules were pretty tight Saturday. We have kissed but nothing more. Normally I'm a girl who waits for a while, but I don't think I can help myself? Sex on the 3rd date too soon? I am really into this guy. What advice do you have?
2006-10-16 04:31:10 · 25 answers · asked by M K 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do it, and DO IT ALL. Times have changed and you need to make sure he is hooked. Go O to completion and hint at A next time.....and ignore the bitter religious puritans on here...they are all lonely and wishing they had the guts or that their husbands came home nights!
2006-10-16 04:34:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I'm not going to be a "religious puritan" type, just a common sense older woman type here.
The time for sex is not yet. You need to find out more about him, what his values are like, hobbies, friends he hangs with, what he does with his quiet time, whether he wants you in that space or not. How does he treat you? Is he a gentleman with his mom or sisters? That's a huge indicator of how he'll treat you.
If you feed the physical attraction more than you allow the emotional and mental attraction to grow, it won't be a healthy relationship. It'll be one-dimensional and painful when he gets bored and it shatters 'cause that's all you had to hold it together.
My advice is to keep it to kissing & handholding but no petting or sex until you're both ready for something more committed. Sorry to those who advise to "go for it!". They're looking at the short term lust and gratification. If you want more, maybe a deep relationship with this guy, then wait.
2006-10-16 04:45:14 · answer #2 · answered by Mmerobin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only person who I ever had sex with early on in the relationship was my husband. We actually were so attracted to eachother, and so into eachother that we did do it on the first date, but it was mutual. (I know what people are going to say about that, and that's ok...we love eachother so I think it's fine)
If you know he's not just gonna up and leave you after this, then I'd say go for it! Nothing wrong with it! If you don't trust him, or think there is a chance he's not gonna call again then I'd say wait a little longer...see what he's like. Good luck :)
2006-10-16 04:37:39 · answer #3 · answered by Huliganjetta 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that it has to be no sooner than the third date but also no earlier than about 2 weeks for a blind date. I'm a hypocrite though; I've had a ton of one night stands but that's all most turned out to be. Waiting is better if you want a real relationship.
2006-10-16 04:35:40 · answer #4 · answered by Kuji 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, if you think you want to be with this guy for a long term, DON'T SLEEP ON THE THIRD DATE!!!
I mean, don't even sleep on the 10th date if he hasn't asked you to be his girl!!
I think people just go sleeping with strangers too easily, and guess what, you'll be dumped in a month.
Don't do that for your sakes, no matter what your friends say.
You will definately regret if you sleep too early!!
I assure you FOR SURE, waiting isn't bad!
When that time comes, and I know you would be seduced very much, but tell him that you won't be sleeping with a guy is not in a relationship.
If he goes away from your life cuz you don't sleep with him easily, than that's the kind of guy, and you don't want that do you?
If you want him to love you, respect yourself. There's NOTHING COOL about sleeping with people you're not in a relationship. Get him to say the words first, and than go in bed!
2006-10-16 04:42:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know in your heart when it is time, it doesnt matter if it is the first date or the 30th date. Sounds like things are going great and I wish you all the best. My wife and I both knew within hours of meeting that it was meant to be. I wont say when it was but we had sex pretty early in our relationship.
2006-10-16 04:34:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the choice is really yours to decide. to some it would seem a bit too soon, would make you out to seem a bit easy, who wants to marry someone who puts out after a couple of dates, if you do it with him how many people has she done it with? it is easier for blokes they are still socially accepted if they sleep about but not for women. the other side is if you fancy him/sex that much take it as far as you want!! oh yeah dont forget safe sex
2006-10-16 04:39:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it all depends, do you think he just wants you for sex? or do you think that it is something that will turn into a relationship? if the only thing that you guys want from each other is just sex or a fling go for it as long as that is what BOTH of you want. but you need to talk about it. to me it is weird, people feel shy or embarrassed to talk about sex, but they feel more ok to just have sex with someone they don't really know that well. you know what i mean, when you talk al you do is move your mouth and words come out, but when you have sex you use so much more.
so basically if yo can't talk to him about it then you shouldn't do it.
2006-10-16 04:45:46 · answer #8 · answered by Stacey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait. Wait. Wait until you know him a lot lot lot better. I believe in waiting til marriage obviously you differ in opinion. Get to know who he is before you put your emotions on the line. If you're they type of woman who can just have sex without attachment then you probably wouldn't be here asking.
2006-10-16 04:36:08 · answer #9 · answered by kyrie_eleison_gr 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it looks like you guys are on the same page, so why not go out on the 3rd date? if youre into this guy and he's giving you the same vibes, then i think you guys are ready for the 3rd date. just because you're use to taking your time doesnt mean you still have too.
good luck for the both of you!
2006-10-16 04:33:57 · answer #10 · answered by kolie_rocks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋