i have had a realy bad couple of months its been one thing after another and today is just another nad day tell me some lmao jokes to get me thru today in a better mood
2006-10-16 03:51:09 · 5 answers · asked by Catie 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A lady walks into a Lexus dealership and browses.
Suddenly she spots the
most perfect, beautiful car and walks over to
inspect it.
As she bends forward to feel the fine leather
upholstery, an unexpected
little fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she
anxiously looks around to
see if anyone has noticed and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right
now. But, as she turns back, there standing next to
her is a salesman.
With a pleasant smile he greets her, "Good day,
Madame. How may we help
you today?" Trying to maintain an air of
sophistication and acting as
though nothing had happened, she smiles back and
asks, "Sir, what is the
price of this lovely vehicle?"
Still smiling pleasantly, he replies, "Madame, I'm
very sorry to say
that if you farted just touching it, you are gonna
**** when you hear
the price."
2006-10-16 04:21:13 · answer #1 · answered by Adele 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?'' When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep. Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!'' The Teacher fainted.
2006-10-16 04:14:14 · answer #2 · answered by Raven's shade 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat.
"I’ll have some ******’ French toast," he says.
The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants.
"Well, I guess that leaves more ******’ French toast for me," he says.
She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast.
"I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the ******’ French toast."
2006-10-16 03:56:33 · answer #3 · answered by S K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well i dont ko a joke but you can e mail me anytime if you need to talk to someone, also remember JESUS LOVES YOU
2006-10-16 03:59:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
sleep well at night and think of me, ur day will be better joke kno........
2006-10-16 04:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by stone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋